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Christmas cracker jokes!

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Christmas cracker jokes!

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Old Dec 24th 2007 | 2:54 pm
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Default Christmas cracker jokes!

What do hedgehogs have for lunch?......Prickled onions

What do you call a chicken in a shell suit?...An egg!!

Why do cows lie down in the rain?....to keep each udder dry.

care to add your's, hope there better than mine
 
Old Dec 24th 2007 | 3:39 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

http://www.nofatchicks.com/nofatchicks/pics/ThatWasn'tChicken.jpg

Maybe fortune cookies ?
 
Old Dec 24th 2007 | 10:37 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

what do you find on a angry sewing machine ?

cross stiches..
 
Old Dec 24th 2007 | 11:14 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

Originally Posted by mands
what do you find on a angry sewing machine ?

cross stiches..
They are terrible arn't they

I laugh at how bad they are...the toys were quite good in the crackers...for once.
 
Old Dec 25th 2007 | 2:02 am
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz
They are terrible arn't they

I laugh at how bad they are...the toys were quite good in the crackers...for once.
heres some more ,i'm sure they get worse

what dance do tin openers do ?
the can can

what is the centre of gravity?
the letter V

which age did the mummies live in ?
the band-age

why are alien gardeners so good?
because they have green fingers

what do you get out of a poorly piano?
a sick note

what is the best thing to do when a hippo sneezes?
get out of the way
 
Old Dec 25th 2007 | 9:44 am
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

Here's one I got in my cracker today - which are the cleverest sweets?

Smarties of course

Sad isn't it - mind you after a couple of large glasses of wine it made me laugh
 
Old Dec 25th 2007 | 2:13 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

We bought some crackers from Go-low for 4.99 for 16... deliberately with no trinkets in as most trinkets are crap. So jokes and hat only.

1st joke, "what kind of cough medicine does Dracular take" "Coffin Medicine"
2nd Joke "what kind of cough medicine does Dracular take" "Coffin Medicine"

And so on 16 times LOL !!
 
Old Dec 25th 2007 | 3:40 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

We got
"What is round, white and furry?"
"A polo bear"
The kids just looked confused and wanted to know what a polo was .
Nicky
Another one that confused them was:
"Why don't polar bears like penguins?"
"Because they can't get the wrappers off"
They had no idea what a penguin biscuit is and thought that it was just a sick joke lol.

Last edited by NickyP; Dec 25th 2007 at 3:42 pm. Reason: yet more cr*p jokes
 
Old Dec 25th 2007 | 8:36 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

Was at a cpl of partys yesterday, and crackers being passed around...

Aussies callem BON BONS !!!

I called em BAD BADS !! after the crap I won !!!!

A joke older than me, and a paper hat fit for a pin head, and no prezzie !!
 
Old Dec 25th 2007 | 8:40 pm
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Default Re: Christmas cracker jokes!

Two cows in a field, which one is on holiday? The one with the wee calf (said with scottish accent week off).
 

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