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The Art of Having a Shower
How to shower like a woman:
Get in shower.use face cloth,arm cloth,leg cloth,long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.Wash hair again to make sure it is clean.condition hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil,leave on hair for 15 minutes.Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.wash rest of body with gingernut and jaffa cake body wash.shave armpits and legs.Turn off shower.Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower,spray mould spots with tile cleaner.Get out of shower.dry yourself with towel the size of a smaal country.Check entire body for spots,tweeze hairs.return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way,cover any exposed areas. How to shower like a man: Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed.Leave in a pile.Walk naked to the bathroom.If you see wife along the way shake your knob at her making woo-hoo sound.Look at manly physique in the mirror.Admire the size of your knob and scratch your arse.Get in shower.Wash your face.Wash your armpits.Hold one finger over each nostril and Blow your nose.Make fart noises(real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.Spend majority of time washing your private parts,Wash your butt leaving coarse hairs in the soap.Shampoo hair.Make shampoo mohican.Pee.Get out of shower.Partially dry off.Fail to notice water on floor.Admire shiny knob in mirror.Leave shower door open,wet mat on floor,light and fan on.Retuen to bedroom with towel around waist.If you pass wife,pull off towel,shake knob at her and make woo-hoo noise again.Throw wet towel on bed. |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
Originally Posted by >Trigger<
How to shower like a woman:
Get in shower.use face cloth,arm cloth,leg cloth,long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.Wash hair again to make sure it is clean.condition hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil,leave on hair for 15 minutes.Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.wash rest of body with gingernut and jaffa cake body wash.shave armpits and legs.Turn off shower.Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower,spray mould spots with tile cleaner.Get out of shower.dry yourself with towel the size of a smaal country.Check entire body for spots,tweeze hairs.return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way,cover any exposed areas. How to shower like a man: Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed.Leave in a pile.Walk naked to the bathroom.If you see wife along the way shake your knob at her making woo-hoo sound.Look at manly physique in the mirror.Admire the size of your knob and scratch your arse.Get in shower.Wash your face.Wash your armpits.Hold one finger over each nostril and Blow your nose.Make fart noises(real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.Spend majority of time washing your private parts,Wash your butt leaving coarse hairs in the soap.Shampoo hair.Make shampoo mohican.Pee.Get out of shower.Partially dry off.Fail to notice water on floor.Admire shiny knob in mirror.Leave shower door open,wet mat on floor,light and fan on.Retuen to bedroom with towel around waist.If you pass wife,pull off towel,shake knob at her and make woo-hoo noise again.Throw wet towel on bed. Have you been speaking to my husband? :D :D |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
Originally Posted by Louise M
Have you been speaking to my husband?
:D :D Nah, it must have been mine ;) :D |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
Originally Posted by >Trigger<
How to shower like a woman:
Get in shower.use face cloth,arm cloth,leg cloth,long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.Wash hair again to make sure it is clean.condition hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil,leave on hair for 15 minutes.Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.wash rest of body with gingernut and jaffa cake body wash.shave armpits and legs.Turn off shower.Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower,spray mould spots with tile cleaner.Get out of shower.dry yourself with towel the size of a smaal country.Check entire body for spots,tweeze hairs.return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way,cover any exposed areas. How to shower like a man: Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed.Leave in a pile.Walk naked to the bathroom.If you see wife along the way shake your knob at her making woo-hoo sound.Look at manly physique in the mirror.Admire the size of your knob and scratch your arse.Get in shower.Wash your face.Wash your armpits.Hold one finger over each nostril and Blow your nose.Make fart noises(real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.Spend majority of time washing your private parts,Wash your butt leaving coarse hairs in the soap.Shampoo hair.Make shampoo mohican.Pee.Get out of shower.Partially dry off.Fail to notice water on floor.Admire shiny knob in mirror.Leave shower door open,wet mat on floor,light and fan on.Retuen to bedroom with towel around waist.If you pass wife,pull off towel,shake knob at her and make woo-hoo noise again.Throw wet towel on bed. Trigger, What is your avatar?! :confused: It looks like an armless hedgehog with a big nose, but I think perhaps it's supposed to be something else!?!? :rolleyes: :D |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
Originally Posted by George&Kim
Trigger,
What is your avatar?! :confused: It looks like an armless hedgehog with a big nose, but I think perhaps it's supposed to be something else!?!? :rolleyes: :D |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
OMG! :scared: You have all had an insight into my life!!!
LMAO Lisa.x :D |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
Must have cctv in my house !!!!! :scared:
Sue |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
[QUOTE=>Trigger<]It can be what ever you want it to be......armless hedgehog? :D[/QUOTE
Unless my eyes deceive me,Its a little penis with feet on his balls!!! |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
:) Thanks that was very funny I think my wife would like some Jaffa cake body scrub.
Ian |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
Originally Posted by >Trigger<
How to shower like a woman:
How to shower like a man: Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed.Leave in a pile.Walk naked to the bathroom. Hold one finger over each nostril and Blow your nose. Make fart noises(real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower. Spend majority of time washing your private parts,Wash your butt leaving coarse hairs in the soap. Pee. Leave shower door open,wet mat on floor,light and fan on. Throw wet towel on bed. 'shake your knob making woo-hoo sound.' and other times i think not... ;) |
Re: The Art of Having a Shower
I've got to admitt thats me to a T but I wax my leg's
Tess xxx :eek: :D |
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