Well, we had our Case Officer last September, did the PCCs in November, the Meds in February....everything was submitted & cleared as "Met" back at the end of March....Now we're waiting, waiting - when will we get our visa grant?

This dropped into my mailbox this morning:

Dear Mr **** & Ms ****,

Thank you for your letter expressing a modicum of frustration with the slow processing of your visa application.

It has come to our notice that you are a frequent participant in an online forum known as British Expats, specifically the Australian Migration forum. We have determined, in order to reduce demand, that your visa should never be granted, given that you will no doubt to tell other people on this forum and thereby deter them from applying.

The reason this has proven necessary is that we have discovered that our migration program in fact works far far better without applicants, particularly with respect to all those annoying complaints. We will of course occasionally let some people in so they can attend functions with the minister, citizenship ceremonies etc, but we find that the numbers required for such symbolic activities are much less than the advertised migration program of over 100,000. In fact, with good costume design, makeup and language training, we only need about 50.

We are not currently selecting English applicants as their constant whining makes it difficult for them to impersonate Chinese and Indian applicants. In fact many Indian applicants can imitate English accents better than the English so we are hoping to one day outsource your entire country, virtually, to India.

I realise that you were anticipating better news, however to be absolutely fair to everyone we cannot possibly give you and your family visas for another 207 years. May I suggest a cryogenic solution? Our preferred cryogenic suppliers are FrozenVizas, see www.fv.com.tv .

Yours sincerely

**********


Well I never!

Hahaha...... I like the letter, amusing.

you know that someone will think that is genuine and start to complain about the morality of DIAC that link takes you to a very strange web page

Gosh... I never followed the link up, I just cut&pasted the letter....

That'll teach me to never trust a man who uses a photo of his youthful grandfather as an avatar

OMG, brialliant !! For a moment, mid way into the 'letter', I almost took it to be true. Instinctively, my brain was rewinding and playing my signing up on BE and creating a username- calculating whether DIAC can (from the username, sign up info and various posts) trace one's application. part of my brain process said "Abort !! Cancel BE subscription right now, just in case , you fall in the same category !! etc etc" . Phew ! Thankfully, towards the end, things calmed down and I realised what it was !
What a way to start my day