And this is the reason why...............
Jun 28th 2014, 7:06 am
#31
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 38,611
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Hello everyone and wow, thanks again for all the good wishes you awesome people xx
Ok well I went to see him and it was just awful, I hardly recognise him and I know now there is nothing anyone can do. He's still got the old spark though, he told me he was fed up and he wanted to come home. The hospice staff were so amazing but we had a good chat and I said I could cope, I've got no kids, medical knowledge and time so they said ok, his face just lit up bless him! He refused to wait for an ambulance so we got him into my sister's car and off we went humming the tune from The Great Escape!
He's now home and Mum, my sister and I are taking it in turns to do 'night duty'. The support we have had is unreal - I never knew how much help was available. Within two days we have a special bed, mattress to prevent pressure sores, a commode, district nurses and a carer who comes in once a day. I have lot of drugs from the hospice so I'm doing all his meds plus fluids as he struggles to eat or drink. They even gave me oro-morphine in the take home pack, which I was surprised at, but it's great as I just give him a small amount when he needs it, he gets pain free rest and he looks so peaceful.
All my Dad wants is to die peacefully at home with dignity cared for by his family and that is what he shall have, he's been an amazing Dad so it's the least I could do.
Thanks again everyone :-) xx
Ok well I went to see him and it was just awful, I hardly recognise him and I know now there is nothing anyone can do. He's still got the old spark though, he told me he was fed up and he wanted to come home. The hospice staff were so amazing but we had a good chat and I said I could cope, I've got no kids, medical knowledge and time so they said ok, his face just lit up bless him! He refused to wait for an ambulance so we got him into my sister's car and off we went humming the tune from The Great Escape!
He's now home and Mum, my sister and I are taking it in turns to do 'night duty'. The support we have had is unreal - I never knew how much help was available. Within two days we have a special bed, mattress to prevent pressure sores, a commode, district nurses and a carer who comes in once a day. I have lot of drugs from the hospice so I'm doing all his meds plus fluids as he struggles to eat or drink. They even gave me oro-morphine in the take home pack, which I was surprised at, but it's great as I just give him a small amount when he needs it, he gets pain free rest and he looks so peaceful.
All my Dad wants is to die peacefully at home with dignity cared for by his family and that is what he shall have, he's been an amazing Dad so it's the least I could do.
Thanks again everyone :-) xx
All the very best to you, as you all ease your Dad and yourselves into his final days or weeks.
It is a good thing you do. I have never ever regretted doing this , despite all the odds against it.
He is your lovely Dad & I simply wish you all a little, teeny bit of quality time if possible and to see him comfy and peaceful.
Jun 28th 2014, 7:30 am
#32
Practical Paramedic
Thread Starter
Joined: Dec 2011
Location: The Beautiful South, UK
Posts: 931
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Hey there from someone who has been exactly there with this 5 years ago. Just me and my Dad though. We were given the exact same amazing care , service & facilities , except it was just me so a Marie Curie nurse would have been put in place to help me. The bed was 25th century to me.
All the very best to you, as you all ease your Dad and yourselves into his final days or weeks.
It is a good thing you do. I have never ever regretted doing this , despite all the odds against it.
He is your lovely Dad & I simply wish you all a little, teeny bit of quality time if possible and to see him comfy and peaceful.
All the very best to you, as you all ease your Dad and yourselves into his final days or weeks.
It is a good thing you do. I have never ever regretted doing this , despite all the odds against it.
He is your lovely Dad & I simply wish you all a little, teeny bit of quality time if possible and to see him comfy and peaceful.
I've been so grateful for the help we have received, like you say it's just amazing what you get isn't it? Everyone has been so kind and caring and very supportive,
I've got a good relationship with the carer and nurses already, they let me help out and I'm respectful of not interfering with their jobs. Mum is getting some rest too which is important as she has run herself ragged over the past few weeks. Today she's going out to see a friend for coffee as she needs a break, my sister is here every day and she is coming over all day Monday so I can have a break and go into town for a bit.
We are coping just fine but the help we have received makes all the difference. I know a lot of people don't get the choice/chance to do this as we all have different circumstances but like you said, no regrets and it's the right thing for us. Thanks for taking the time to reply, it helps hearing from other people who have gone through it x
Jun 28th 2014, 10:59 am
#33
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Joined: Nov 2012
Location: Back in the UK!
Posts: 2,404
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Miss Betty, we are all here with you in spirit. (((MASSIVE HUGS)))
Jun 29th 2014, 9:01 pm
#34
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Location: Scotland, just!
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Re: And this is the reason why...............
Miss B. I laughed and I cried when I read your comment about your dad humming the tune to "The Great Escape", no doubt in my mind that you are your father's daughter. I am glad your dad is home with you and your family.
Jun 30th 2014, 4:39 am
#35
Practical Paramedic
Thread Starter
Joined: Dec 2011
Location: The Beautiful South, UK
Posts: 931
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Hi everyone just to let you know my awesome Dad died last night. It was just us here, Mum my sister and I held him, told him we loved him and he just slipped away, it was very peaceful and dignified.
I'm still in shock but I do take comfort that I was here and carried out his wishes as I know a lot of people never get that chance.
Thank you for all your kind messages I'm very grateful xx
I'm still in shock but I do take comfort that I was here and carried out his wishes as I know a lot of people never get that chance.
Thank you for all your kind messages I'm very grateful xx
Jun 30th 2014, 4:56 am
#36
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 38,611
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Sorry for your loss. Hard days of grieving to come then for there is never a right time to lose someone is there.
I am sure you will give your Dad the very best of final farewells.
I am sure you will give your Dad the very best of final farewells.
Jun 30th 2014, 5:29 am
#37
Forum Regular
Joined: Aug 2013
Location: Tauranga
Posts: 112
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Big hugs Miss Betty, so sorry to hear this. Love and care to you, xx
Jun 30th 2014, 7:35 am
#38
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Joined: Jan 2011
Location: A Proud Height, Northumberland UK
Posts: 1,163
Re: And this is the reason why...............
So sorry you've lost your Dad MissB, he sounds like he was a lovely man. It's good to hear you're able to take some comfort from being there for him and being able to carry out his wishes; I think this will help you through the difficult times to come - I've been there. My condolences to you and your family. 
Jun 30th 2014, 8:03 am
#39
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Joined: Jul 2008
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Re: And this is the reason why...............
Sorry to hear about your dad..
Jun 30th 2014, 8:11 am
#40
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Location: Canberra
Posts: 8,378
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Hi everyone just to let you know my awesome Dad died last night. It was just us here, Mum my sister and I held him, told him we loved him and he just slipped away, it was very peaceful and dignified.
I'm still in shock but I do take comfort that I was here and carried out his wishes as I know a lot of people never get that chance.
Thank you for all your kind messages I'm very grateful xx
I'm still in shock but I do take comfort that I was here and carried out his wishes as I know a lot of people never get that chance.
Thank you for all your kind messages I'm very grateful xx
Jun 30th 2014, 8:26 am
#41
SUPER MODERATOR
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 88,017
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Hi everyone just to let you know my awesome Dad died last night. It was just us here, Mum my sister and I held him, told him we loved him and he just slipped away, it was very peaceful and dignified.
I'm still in shock but I do take comfort that I was here and carried out his wishes as I know a lot of people never get that chance.
Thank you for all your kind messages I'm very grateful xx
I'm still in shock but I do take comfort that I was here and carried out his wishes as I know a lot of people never get that chance.
Thank you for all your kind messages I'm very grateful xx
Jun 30th 2014, 8:39 am
#42
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 603
Re: And this is the reason why...............
I'm so very sorry for your great loss. Your Dad sounded like a lovely, lovely man and as IF1 said it's clear you got your wonderful sense of humor from him.
We have never met and yet reading about your family's loss has had me in tears, where ever you end up calling home in the future I am so glad that you made the move back to the UK which enabled you to have that last holiday with your Dad and that you were able to be there with him at the end I am sure that was a great comfort to him.
Deepest sympathy to you and your family. x
We have never met and yet reading about your family's loss has had me in tears, where ever you end up calling home in the future I am so glad that you made the move back to the UK which enabled you to have that last holiday with your Dad and that you were able to be there with him at the end I am sure that was a great comfort to him.
Deepest sympathy to you and your family. x
Jun 30th 2014, 9:04 am
#43
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Joined: Apr 2010
Location: NS, Canada 2007-2013. Now....England!
Posts: 2,211
Re: And this is the reason why...............
MissBetty, so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. My sympathies to you and your family
Jun 30th 2014, 9:05 am
#44
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Re: And this is the reason why...............
So very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family right now.
Jun 30th 2014, 10:17 am
#45
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Posts: 2,404
Re: And this is the reason why...............
Saddened to hear this, but glad you were all there to send him on his way. May he rest in peace. We are here to lend a shoulder whenever you need it xx