Your top tips for making new friends
Mar 22nd 2009, 7:57 am
#16
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 159
Re: Your top tips for making new friends
Hi
Keep smiling and being friendly and saying hello - and keep doing it even if you get ignored. I did this for 2 months with the school mums until suddenly some of them started talking to me.
Develop a really thick skin - some Aussies can be very direct but that's just how they are and probably aren't trying to offend you
Oh and volunteer for everything and anything you can to do with your kids - you'll meet loads of other mums that way.
Good luck
Keep smiling and being friendly and saying hello - and keep doing it even if you get ignored. I did this for 2 months with the school mums until suddenly some of them started talking to me.
Develop a really thick skin - some Aussies can be very direct but that's just how they are and probably aren't trying to offend you
Oh and volunteer for everything and anything you can to do with your kids - you'll meet loads of other mums that way.
Good luck
Mar 22nd 2009, 8:14 am
#17
Forum Regular
Joined: Jun 2002
Location: South Australia
Posts: 108
Re: Your top tips for making new friends
[QUOTE=Three Legs;7405713][QUOTE=homewardbound;7404923]I usually keep away from neighbours at all costs.
Are you from London ... ?
That sentance optimises everything that has gone wrong with Britain in the last 20 years ... in my opinion anyhow ... which counts for 'very' little.
I think you have something there.
We live in Oz and have done so for the last 6 fantastic years. Not every day has been easy as it wouldn't have been in the UK but anyway - I'm just getting to the point of this post:
Myself and wifey are not particularly good at making friends and never have been - that said we have always had a small circle of close friends, even in the UK. This is not always enough for everyone. However since we have lived in Oz we have a much wider circle of really close friends.
Because you leave family and friends behind the ones that you make over here are that much more special, and in a sense become your family.
To balance this out (I'm still getting to the point) I am still in touch with the lovely couple that moved into our house in the UK - in a small village in Bedfordshire. They email me from time to time and let me know how they are getting on. They have made lots of friends in the local community and are so happy that they made the move (as are we!) whereas when we lived there we were on 'nodding' terms with the immediate neighbours but that was about it. They are a retired couple.
And my point (I said I was getting there) is that we now have the time to make friends and maintain those friendships - which are a two way street.
When we lived in the UK (South East) we were so busy working 12-14 hours a day to keep body and soul together and paying for our material goods and expensive holidays that we took whenever possible to get out of that hellhole, that we missed the simple things that were just as attainable there.
It was just that the life we were living didn't give us that time. Now we have 'downsized' (not a term I like) we have the time to be real people.
I guess the point is that we are not as selfish as we were in the UK - which in my eyes kind of explains what has gone wrong in the UK - reinforcing your point above........
Our only regret is that we never moved here 20 years sooner.....
MAX
Are you from London ... ?
That sentance optimises everything that has gone wrong with Britain in the last 20 years ... in my opinion anyhow ... which counts for 'very' little.
We live in Oz and have done so for the last 6 fantastic years. Not every day has been easy as it wouldn't have been in the UK but anyway - I'm just getting to the point of this post:
Myself and wifey are not particularly good at making friends and never have been - that said we have always had a small circle of close friends, even in the UK. This is not always enough for everyone. However since we have lived in Oz we have a much wider circle of really close friends.
Because you leave family and friends behind the ones that you make over here are that much more special, and in a sense become your family.
To balance this out (I'm still getting to the point) I am still in touch with the lovely couple that moved into our house in the UK - in a small village in Bedfordshire. They email me from time to time and let me know how they are getting on. They have made lots of friends in the local community and are so happy that they made the move (as are we!) whereas when we lived there we were on 'nodding' terms with the immediate neighbours but that was about it. They are a retired couple.
And my point (I said I was getting there) is that we now have the time to make friends and maintain those friendships - which are a two way street.
When we lived in the UK (South East) we were so busy working 12-14 hours a day to keep body and soul together and paying for our material goods and expensive holidays that we took whenever possible to get out of that hellhole, that we missed the simple things that were just as attainable there.
It was just that the life we were living didn't give us that time. Now we have 'downsized' (not a term I like) we have the time to be real people.
I guess the point is that we are not as selfish as we were in the UK - which in my eyes kind of explains what has gone wrong in the UK - reinforcing your point above........
Our only regret is that we never moved here 20 years sooner.....
MAX
Mar 22nd 2009, 9:43 pm
#18
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: Whinging Aussie
Posts: 523
Re: Your top tips for making new friends
OK, so we arrived in Australia about a year ago. My wife didn't really know anyone, and now has circles of friends from:
1. Work - she is a nurse, which is a pretty sociable profession
2. Playgroup - we have a baby daughter now
3. Post-natal mother's group
4. Nursery Rhymes group at the local library
5. Baby swimming classes
6. Church - we're not strong belivers but it's a great way to meet people
7. Neighbours
She met many of these people jsut through suggesting they go for coffee after playgroup, swimming etc. She also introduced people from one group to people from another, which helped cement her place in the middle of things.
You really have to work at it, phone people multiple times even if you haven't heard back etc. Another big tip is to say 'yes' to absolutely every social invitation you get in the first 6 months, even if you don't feel like going - it will pay dividends down the line.
1. Work - she is a nurse, which is a pretty sociable profession
2. Playgroup - we have a baby daughter now
3. Post-natal mother's group
4. Nursery Rhymes group at the local library
5. Baby swimming classes
6. Church - we're not strong belivers but it's a great way to meet people
7. Neighbours
She met many of these people jsut through suggesting they go for coffee after playgroup, swimming etc. She also introduced people from one group to people from another, which helped cement her place in the middle of things.
You really have to work at it, phone people multiple times even if you haven't heard back etc. Another big tip is to say 'yes' to absolutely every social invitation you get in the first 6 months, even if you don't feel like going - it will pay dividends down the line.
