jajpe

i remember a time when i dropped the kids off at school came home, had a coffee, got on with a little housework, had lunch, did the odd night-duty, fed the kids and did all round normal everyday stuff. then my husband went to bed one night and had a dream........that we all lived out in the wilds, on a little lifestyle place in NEW ZEALAND. i laughed of course, made him his breaskfast (checked his temperature) and thought that would be the end of it!
now here we are about 3 years later with a fact finding holiday booked for april to try to decide once and for all if we are going to follow his dream and i find myself TOTALLY addicted to this website and all things new zealand.
i have to be honest that somedays it is now my dream too! i say somedays because being a woman and a bit more hormonal and emotional than he is inclined to be, there are days when i think through all the tough bits , like all the goodbyes and locking the door of my much-loved home for the very last time and i think there is just no way i will ever be able to do this ..... ever.
i've read paula post about building a new life in nz this morning for about the sixth time, and it is so encouraging but i would really love to know more of peoples stories from the early stages. who's idea was it in your house? what are the main fears? what are the main reasons to leave (and not just for whinging sake!!!)
i really hope you join in as i am/was a very settled (read boring) person and am really curious about what drives people to actually go right through with this!!

pommiesheila

It was HIS fault - the hubbies, of course... I was that "settled" person too!!! But hey, life`s too short not to have adventures....

sophia

hì there

well I think you will find many many different motives for people moving around. Ours was a little out of the ordinary....
I am an Australian citizen, was born in Sydney but moved to the uk when I was young and brought up in Yorkshire (which I absolutely adore!!), so I've always had a yearning to come back to Australia but could never afford it. Anyway, met my husband who knew about my dream to move back but had no interest in moving away from his native Wakefield (?!! lord knows why !!!). I never pushed it as he was more important than moving to oz.

Anyway, I got diagnosed with breast cancer (at 28 years old!) whilst 8 months pregnant with our child. That pretty much turned our world upside down and made us re-evaluate our lives BIG time.

I used to be an executive PA with a large blue chip firm in Leeds and it was an incredibly stressful job (which I largely blame for the cancer, although I realise it wasn't the only factor, but stress can be a significant factor in triggering cancer). I decided that life was WAY too short to spend being stressed out to the max and left my job.

About 3 months into my chemotherapy we were talking one morning when husband said 'why don't we get some books on living in Australia?'...so basically that was that....I never pushed him, but it was obvious to us both that we wanted to appreciate the time we have together as we don't know how long that will be (none of us do eh?)

We applied for the spouse visa and had it granted almost immediately and came out in September 2002. We live in WA now, and I would totally agree with Watt Dabneys assessment of the early days, it is hard, but if you look on it as an adventure that you will have together rather than This is forever, you will enjoy the experience all the more.

My little boy has really come on in these last few months...he's seen pelicans on the beach up close, quokkas on Rottnest Island (which come up to you for petting) and best of all, dolphins came right up to rockingham beach yesterday afternoon...it's the first time I've seen them in the wild and I was very emotional!!! We couldn't have give him those sorts of experiences in Wakefield that's for sure!!

I've started yoga classes at the local yacht club which has panoramic views of the indian ocean to look at whilst practising...hmmm wonder what my view would have been if I'd taken up yoga in Wakefield?

I would definitely advise people to at least stick it out for their citizenship, then your options are always open.

I'm a firm believer now that LIFE is what YOU make it.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

love sophia xx

jajpe

[QUOTE]Originally posted by sophia

dear sophia,
thank-you so much for your inspirational reply. i appreciate the time you took to put all that down on record. congratioulations too on getting through such a hard time and turning your dream into reality. i read most of your post with tears in my eyes(told you i am an emotional being) but you are so right that life is too short and we never know just how short!

i guess sometimes we need to just get on with it and not waste what precious time we have.

anyway wishing you God's very best for your life in Austalia or whereever this big adventure leads you

FOX

Well,

We spent a year travelling and working in Australia, and on returning my husband (although we weren't married then) would have packed and got straight back on the plane he loved it so much. Being the voice of reason I insisted that we try to settle back into our lives here, to avoid acting upon the initial misery of having returned to England!! A year later I conceeded that I too wnted more than we had so agreed to look into it, and so starts the rollercoaster!!

Having approached our agent he said we should have no problem applying under the skilled sponsored category and explained to us what documentation we would need to prove our de facto status, already sensing that we did not need any further complication this prompted us to get on with it and we were married 2 weeks later!! One less bit of paperwork to deal wiith!!!

Our initial application was submitted on 30 June 99 and for reasons I can't bare to go into in great detail we are still waiting!! Oversights on the part of our agent (don't even start me on that) Problems with our sponsor and assuror of support etc. Anyway as our initial application languishes in the pool, our second application was submitted feb 01, we have just submitted details for a new assuror and have everything crossed that we may hear some good news in the not too distant future!

Getting back to the original thread, I guess ultimatly it was a joint decision driven by the desire to live a DIFFERENT (not better necessarily) type of life. We loved Australia, we are very aware that it will not be a long holiday, and now 4 years down the line we have invested just about every emotion we have to this and we are damm well going to give it a good go!!

The waiting is excrutiating, my husband seems to cope with it better than me, I just want some control back over our lives, and so packing, moving starting afresh and everything that comes with it, whilst daunting is the part of this that I am desperate to get on with!!

Don't actually know if that is what you were looking for, but it has made me feel a bit better!!

Sarah

magnetman

What a fantastic post Sophia (tho' I thought Wonder Woman was American!)

Hope some of the miserable gits on here read it and think

Good luck to you and your family, you've got exactly the right attitude to make this work

pamzo

What an ispiration Sophia. I too read your reply with tears in my eyes.

My hubby travelled Australia 12 years ago on a years visa and has always wanted to go back. I agreed as I don't have much family here and couldn't think of a good reason why not ! I liked the idea of an adventure. We are expecting our visa in the next couple of months and are going on holiday to Perth in 3 weeks.

Can I ask you what you think of the work ethic there as many comments on this website suggest long working hours, few holidays with little time for leisure & family (we have 2 young children). My Husband is a Senior Account working in Industry/commerce.
Your opinion would be very much appreciated.
Pamzo

P.S. so glad things are working out for you - you sound very happy.

Watt Dabney

Wow what a good question!
Now ours is a bit of a long story, I'll try and be brief.
We had been wanting out of the UK since our son was born 7yrs ago, but at that time it wasn't possible. You see due to one thing & another my husband, athough a brilliant engineering tradesman, had no formal quals, he had gained all his skills through years of informal on the job training. So the dream of emigrating was just that a dream.
Then he got a job with a large firm, where he worked his butt off and got a good position and reputation with the top brass. They saw what a talented bloke he was and knew that he was going to need formal quals to get further. So they put him through his NVQS and some C&G courses.
So suddenly we found ourselves in the position where emigrating was a possibility! So we looked at our options, and due to the slight complication of his quals being at the wrong end of his work experience, we had decided to go STNI to Adelaide as his job is in demand there.
At this point in the process we both take responsibility, although Billy Connolly should take his share. We approached the company for references to start the application, and thay said they did not want to lose him and they always needed good engineers in NZ, and offered him a job!
Well after picking ourselves off the floor and doing some hasty research on NZ! we said thankyou very much!
So for leaving the UK I would say was equal faults of Hubby/me/Billy Connolly, for coming to NZ the company's, and I can't thank them enough!
I agree with Sofia life is what you make it. Our life is what my hubby's hard work has made it, and I'm very proud of him. he never lost sight of his goal, no matter how unobtainable it seemed. Although the job offer made things easier for him, he deserved it. Having done everything else the hard way, (40+ hr week being the sole wage earner and fitting in college/course work, at one point doing two courses at the same time!)
We are now experiencing the lifestlye we could only dream of in the UK, thanks to the hard work of my hubby. Now I won't praise him anymore cause he won't be able to get his head through the door in a minute!!!


Paula

muppetking

Without dreams where would we all be! We took the plunge 2 years ago after getting fed up with our lives in England and moved to Christchurch. It's been a fascinating journey and although we have decided it's not for us (we have applied to move to Oz) we wouldn't change anything. I hope you all like rugby!! Good luck with your decision!

jajpe

Hi!!
thanks to every one for all of these replies. i have thoroughly enjoyed reading them today and i think i'm even feeling a tad more adventurous!! Hubby will be pleased!!

poggle

Hi All,

Well i know we've all got our reasons for giving up 'life as we know it' in the UK, and gambling on a better life in Oz or Nz, but I firmly believe in 'life is what you make it!' and was really 'moved' by Sophia's post.

Im so glad things have worked out well for you Sophia, and wish you continued good luck, health and happiness for your future!

I've learned also from personal experience, that medically, you never know whats around the corner, so follow your dream, no matter what! Life's too short! and if things don't work out , at least you tried and had an adventure! better than sitting at home and wondering about all the 'what if's'?!!!when its too late!

Good luck to everyone still waiting!!

Cheers

lizzie

Well, compared to Sophia's very courageous tale, ours is going to seem like nothing. Bascially, like most people on here, we have become very disillusioned with the UK, (here comes the whinge bit) Tony Blair hasn't made things any better and my other half who was self-employed was struggling to find opportunities. He once mentioned going to work in Germany and my Mother burst into tears at the prospect of us moving, so for a while we never mentioned anything again but between ourselves continued to moan and whinge.

Last February whilst working for a large UK company he got talking to someone who had worked in NZ and the idea sprung from there. He came home and said "How do you fancy moving to NZ" and I took the idea and ran with it before he had time to change his mind. It became my little project, soaking up every little bit of info. on NZ that I could find, this is when I found this Forum which has been a godsend. By June we were ready to send in our application, unfortunately the passmark changed before we could get everything together and we had to take the JSV route.

People familiar with my posts will know that my partner is currently in NZ searching for a job, so we're not home and dry yet. We know that NZ isn't without its own problems but at the moment we think it will be a better option for us with 3 children but it could still all come to nothing. Just need to keep holding that dream a bit longer ...

Lizzie

pamcorry

Sophia
Thanks for the great thread!

I first went to NZ in 1999 to see friends and couldn't get the place out of my head, I returned in 2001 and again, dumb founded with the way people treated you 'as a real person!!!', the lack of litter, the care that people have for their towns and cities and each time I returned to Manchester (apart from seeing my family) I wondered why I was here....I don't know what it is but once a place has got you, it doesn't let go!!!
My New Years Resolution is to be there by Sept of this year to put my mind at rest!!!!

Godd luck to everyone else in the same boat!!!

Herman

How we ended up here is quite convoluted. I came to Australia backpacking for a year in 1996 and had a laugh but felt that being on the backpacker trail I had never really got to know what it was like to really live here. I returned to the UK with the perspective that I wanted to make the most of my life and build a decent career in a job involving international travel. After a short while I landed a great job in corporate finance in London for one of the big four and within a week was on a plane to Taiwan for my first assignment and in 2 years never really properly unpacked in London!
After 2 years of living, working and playing hard in London and various other overseas locations I was actually beginning to get fed up with it and was considering the benefits of a simpler, easier life. Anyway, whilst having these thoughts I was sent on assignment to Prague to help an English company buy a Czech company and on my very first night out in the Czech Republic got talking to a beautiful young lady in a bar and was 'struck by lightening'. She was a Czech who had been back in Prague for just a month, having lived in Zurich for a while. We saw each other at weekends, whenever we could, for a year and then decided to go on a long holiday together to test the relationship. We did 6 weeks touring France and by the end of it I was truly ready to propose, but did'nt want to rush it. We worked out a way she could come to London without any major visa issues - she came over on a student visa to study Englsih for a year to formalise her already strong English with a qualification.
Half way through her one year course we were trying to work out what to do next as the time was approaching when major UK visa issues were likely to arise for her. We decided we would go somewhere overseas and were considering Austria, France or Switzerland. About a week later I got chatting to a new joiner at work who came from the Sydney office and I asked him jokingly if I could get a job there. He gave me a bit of an interview and he reckoned I had the skills they required and put in a phone call on my behalf to the top boys in Sydney. Within 48 hours I had been involved in a teleconference interview and had a secondment lined up for 2 years and, even better, my then girlfriend could come on my visa with full work rights. The absolute icing on the cake was that after some negotiation they agreed to continue to pay me UK salary.
So here we are, now married (last year we returned to Prague to get married). Its been great and I have an offer to stay (on local salary which would be a 60% pay cut) if we want. We came with open minds but, after having seen and experienced so much of the rest of the world, we feel that Australia is not for us long term. Yes it has many wonderful qualities but at the end of the day both my wife and I adore travelling and experiencing other cultures and the door to the rest of the world snaps shut pretty quickly when you are here (particularly on local salary).
Also we are planning to start a family and neither of us wants to do that here - we both love each others families to bits (no escaping the mother in laws for us!) and plan to relocate to the south west of england near my family but also to buy a holiday home/weekender in her country, the Czech Republic.
Knowing us this may not be our last move and Vienna is only a 2 hour drive from my wife's family so we are learning German just in case we get fed up with life in South West England or the desire to move to Austria becomes too strong.
Thats our story - we both love the UK for the wealth of overseas travelling options it affords, as much as for the great lifestyle people have there. British moan and groan about how terrible it is but we both believe they just dont know, or more to the point appreciate, how lucky they are.

Watt Dabney

Herman,

I'm not spoiling for an argument, but you have definately experienced Britain from a different viewpiont than us and I suspect a lot of others.
If we were in your postition (earning potential) i am sure i would feel exactly the same. Britain is a lovely place, if you can afford it. As for overseas travel options, the last time we went overseas from the UK was before our son was born, infact that holiday was the last holiday we actually afforded to pay for ourselves! Since we started a family we have holidayed on relatives charity only. When you are trying to live in the UK on £17k a year for a family of four the history and travel dosen't mean much as you can't afford to partake in it. In fact it becomes very frustrating to 'look but not touch' so to speak.Then when you realise that £17k is pretty much as high as its going to get in your profession and what you do gains you zero social respect because you 'get your hands dirty for a living' Britain dosen't look so lovely.
Our ability to travel hasn't changed much for our move, but now we can afford to live in the nice part of town, instead of on the edge of a rundown council estate. Respect for the trades is better here. your a tradesman because you are skilled at it not because you are too dumb to do anything else. The paystructure of trades compared with professinals is a little more equal, which is good for us, but for those who are used to the Uk where some are more equal than others its not so good for them.
So for some people OZ/NZ is the right move, we do appreciate Britain, in fact more than most we do appreciate how lucky SOME people are to live there.
I'm not trying to start an argument with you when you get back just do some sums and see how much of Britain you could appreciate on £17k between 4 of you.


Paula