S Oldfield

Still having trouble with the family.
we are half in and half out of our house. My sister keeps ringing gggrrrr.
What ya doing she asks ina dull dreary voice. I know they dont want us to go, but her and mum have now adopted this tone of voice that gives me the impression that we are gonna die at any minute. Its all......what ya doing, oh thats nice. all in bloody slow motion!!!

Really pulling me down

Megalania

Doppler shift.

NedKelly63

Thats woman for you!!

Salli

Family can be tricky....my Mum has taken to getting really upset everytime I talk to her. I feel really mean but all it's doing is putting me off calling her and making me want to get to Oz even quicker!

She's now talking about arranging a leaving do and getting the rest of the family there....going to be a real bundle of laughs! I can see her spending the entire time crying and making me feel guilty.....my aunt seems to be joining in with her and is just making matters 10 times worse

I know I sound really mean, and I don't mean to be....I'm just finding it really tiring....I really want her to be happy for me but right now she just seems really depressed.

This site is great though....gives me a real lift when I read the posts from people are already there. Don't give up, it will all be worth it.

Paul&Ann-Marie

Sandra, you are not alone .
We too have noticed people around us suddenly talking in slow motion, mostly my mum but also my brother in laws.
They must feel armageddon is approaching or something

Paul.

footie chick

Families !!

We aren`t at the leaving stage yet, but i popped into see my dad to tell him about our trip to Oz next week. He " have a nice holiday and we will see you when you get back " he is in denial i feel

But have bottled with my mum will tell her the day before we go next week she will think that i am leaving for good and the time for that will come soon enough.

Don`t let the buggars grind u down Sandra you have enough on your plate without their selfish whims.

footie xx

bundy

My mum says is often enough, but it's a true point - if you can't think of anything nice to say, then keep quite quiet. Maybe you should treat your lot like this!

I know what you mean by the slo-mo thing though - your life is whizzing along while others are plodding along as usual. Be patient with them, but don't tolerate them trying to bring you down

Kiwilamb

Family leaving do- that would have been nice, my parents took the news we were going so badly that they wouldn't even come to see us off and have refused to visit. We left just after New Year and I didn't even receive a christmas present or even a christmas card We talk now moreorless every week but it is on our phone bill. :scared:

How have other people found the family have taken the news?

S Oldfield

Oh I am so sorry to hear this.


From my own experiance if my kids said they were going to the moon, my love and best wishes would go with them.
I would never condone them or hold them back. If I knew I had made them unhappy I would be devastated.

bundy

Same with my parents. In fact, my mum is virtually nagging us to go! She feels great guilt that we delayed it because of her getting sick, and is determined to get better so that we are less worried about leaving her.

That said, I come from a family that lives all over the world, so it's no unusual for us to disperse - I'm doing my bit and colonising the antipodes, which is about the only place we haven't got to yet.

Although I can see that parents holding their kids back can seem selfish, I guess you have to remember that, to older generations, Oz probably seems further away than the moon. No excuse for not making the best of it though...

malpjc

i was really worried about having to tell my mum,in the end my wife told her and after 20 seconds she said that was brilliant,they would miss us but did not blame us for wanting to try.
i have read the other posts on this subject and cannot believe how selfish some of your families are being,if i got that response from mine i think i would just let them get on with it and concentrate on my new life,it sounds like most of them are jealous,if my kids wanted to do something that made them happy i would encourage them not try and make them miserable,don't let them grind you down

Pollyana

My sister and her family were quite upset, because we had grown very close, but the kids now write to me, and my nephew got a mobile phone for his 11th birthday last week so I am now getting texts from him! My sister's first reaction, although she was upset, was that its my life, and if it makes me happy I should go for it. They are now saving for holidays, and we exchange very long letters each week!

My mum was frighteningly philosophical, and having moved house last month she now "uses" me to make friends......."oooh my daughter is in Australia you know......" and its working a treat! She seems to be a local celebrity!

My dad - his initial comment was "well, she can't run home when it all collapses around her" (to my sister, not to my face!) - but he is now really pleased as I've managed to make the move, and get jobs, and for the first time in my life he has said he is proud of me. After 40 years that means something.

I'm glad I stuck to my guns, remember, you only have one shot at life, don't spend the rest of your time regretting what you haven't done.

artep

Keep your chin up Sandra.....you're nearly there

Don't allow them to get to you and grind you down.....you have my number if you need a chat or want a bit of 'time out'

Petra xx

debsy

Oh Sandra, poor you. People can be so hurtful at times. I am sure that they do not want to be like that but they probably cannot help acting that way as they will miss so much they dont know what to do. You have to try to undertsand them. Not long left now. You will be ok. It is hard though. Some of my friends have gone all cold on me too now the time is drawing near.

I have got to go to say goodbye to the inlaws in a couple of weeks time. I am not looking forward to that as my MIL is the queen of emotional blackmail. I have told my husband not to tell them the exact date otherwise we might end up having to visit for a sudden illness

Chin up girl you will be there soon.

Don

Sounds remarkably like my MIL. My wife and I had a pact that we weren't going back for any medical 'emergency' from my MIL whilst we were setting up in NZ. Not sure if my wife would have held firm but the old trout (my MIL, that is) already had a few little emergencies in the past when she needed a bit of attention...