janeyray

It makes me quite angry when I read that people who don't stay in the country they choose to emmigrate to mustn't have the right attitude.

Now this isn't a thread for a expats fight between thoses who do and those who dont, its just my thoughts and I wanted to share them

I read from many posters who are yet waiting to go/or those that are settled and living quite happily in thier new chosen country that if you want to return or don't like where you are then it's all about attitude?

What is the right attitude then? Are they saying that as soon as we land that we aren't prepared to work? we aren't prepared to live a different way/to adapt to their culture? that we aren't prepared to leave the Uk behind? What?..what is then that makes the right attitude???

I think my family certainly had the 'same' attitude that the thousands of migrants that leave the UK each day have. We planned for ages, did our research, did everything the same as everyone else, we didnt do anything different.

When we arrived we did the same as everyone else, made friends (Aussie and British) hubby got a job, daughter started school, we bought a house, we got on with our lives in Perth. We didnt have a different attitude towards Australia that singled us out as a definate to return to the UK. Homesickness isn't a fault, it isn't an attitude problem.

Everything we did in our plans to go to Australia were the same as thousands of others...it's just plain and simple... you either like it or you dont, there is no hidden secret as to why some stay and some don't. It doesn't matter what type of person you are and what type of attitude you have...what rubbish. Please please please have an open mind about why others return, dont assume one thing.

Vash the Stampede

Liking it or not liking it has a lot to do with attitude.

Brisben

I Like and agree with your post, however attitude is probably the wrong word and it is very stereotypical. Mind set is an individual trait and only as individuals can we have an attitude. Reasons for making decisions in life are based on individual experiences and thought processes.

Those that think you have an attitude do not know you and what your thinking therefore it is not a word "ATTITUDE" it is an individual trait, ignore those that stereotype you because you think one way and not the other

eurotramp

I think it has more to do with you own expectations...

moneypenny20

Whilst I would agree with 99% of what you have said, I would just add my two pennyworth.

I read stacks of threads on here and am still gob smacked how people "read" things that are not there. Yes people say you (general you not personal) don't have the right attitude but that is mainly when the op has written in such a way that makes you think that. In your (personal) case, you have always written in a way that people understand and most would not argue with your thoughts.

Others jump with totally negative "everything is wrong, nothing is right" comments. They are the ones that get given the wrong attitude label. Generalisations will always happen, but when they are stated as facts, they will put other people's backs up and they will then bite back.

Obviously some people are having such a hard time, it is impossible for them to be fair because they can't see any light at the end of the tunnel.

There will always be people who DO have the wrong attitude wherever they live. There are far more who try their best but can't make something work.

You will also always get someone (whether you would call them a troll or not) who will say you are wrong whatever you say. Some of these people are sad, some are just playing devils advocate.

<")))><

Sorry janeyray but I think you are wrong. EVERYTHING you do depends on what type of person you are - whether you tackle things now, tomorrow or never, whether you learn to accept the differences or similarities and roll with them or not...and so on. I think it's ALL to do with attitude.

I agree that there is no right attitude to have however, your perspective on life, reasons for emigrating, happiness in spite of difficulties will dictate whether you stay or go home (or even move on again). You are who you are and must decide for yourselves.

merlotsmum

Sometimes you can apply yourself to something until the cows come home but it just does not happen for you.

How may of us have been in a job say, tried everything in our power to make it happen and it just doesn't - you end up leaving. It is just not you.

I never used to like sprouts now I love them, life is all about change, trying new things - you grow up and move on too.

<")))><

Hehehehehe...just read that again....must learn to read. <ignore>

Centurion

Some valid points there made but surely individual perceptions do make a large difference to the way in which events are dealt with by different people.

Some people choose to become irrate in queue and huff and puff, others use the time more constructively or adopt a "c'est la vie" manner. However, there will always be events and circumstances beyond your control which may mean that you feel you must return for example.

You are correct there is neither right or wrong for whatever decision a person makes that they are happy with is the correct one. I'm sorry that things didnt work out for you the way that you had hoped.

<")))><

Sprouts are all in the mind.

janeyray

Thats right, there is no right attitude, its all how things appear to an individual. I take the word attitude as a negative word to begin with. Its a strong word to use regarding someone you dont know.

merlotsmum

I have to agree with those that come on here that don't know you in the real world and tell you how you should go about living your life, we are all very different, in fact I handle my life in such a different way to say 2 years ago back in Australia. I have changed a lot.

merlotsmum

soapy©

oh yes there is.
u need the right attitude, if it dont work....fine! at least u gave it your best shot.
but dont dare come here thinking its little england !!!!!!
RIGHT, IVE STEPPED AFF MA SOAPBOX

Hutch

I think there's a lot of merit in the idea that the written word often fails to convey the real sentiment behind a post. The odd smiley dropped here and there can suggest you're kidding about something, but it's so easy to misconstrue someone's intentions from their posts. My missus is forever getting her knickers in a twist about emails she gets from clients and yet when I read them I don't get any indication of attitude from the person. You really have to tread carefully - but that swings both ways - in terms of original posts and their responces