Telling family your plans, how far ahead should you say it?
Feb 16th 2005, 3:53 am
#31
Paul, Louise, Laura & Amy
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: Kinross, Perth, WA
Posts: 601
Re: Telling family your plans, how far ahead should you say it?
Originally Posted by teach
Hi,
We told our families once we were absolutely sure it was what we both wanted. They have been great.
A word of warning about telling others!!! I had to tell the headteacher I was going because I needed a reference for my NOOSR, I did this in the October. I didn't tell anyone else at work but last June a member of staff asked me out right whether I was still going to New Zealand. I told them that I wasn't ever considering New Zealand and left it at that. Before I knew what was going on a number of staff started quizzing me. I approached the head, who denied ever telling anyone (like I believed him). I decided that from that point I would be totally honest about going, huge mistake. Since then I have been treated like a leper. I've been called into the office more times than I can count because people, well one in particular didn't like the way I spoke to her, looked at her etc, she has made sly little remarks about not caring anymore as I'm leaving. My life has been hell since June, I've spoken to the head and told him that her personal remarks are upsetting, he brushed it off as her being under a lot of stress. The most recent incident was put down to me being too enthusiatic but then in the same sentence the head said maybe I was getting complacent because I was leaving. If you can work that out, I'll buy you a pint.
So go ahead and tell your family, I'm sure after the initial shock they will all be supportive but choose wisely outside of your family.
Best of luck.
Sarah
We told our families once we were absolutely sure it was what we both wanted. They have been great.
A word of warning about telling others!!! I had to tell the headteacher I was going because I needed a reference for my NOOSR, I did this in the October. I didn't tell anyone else at work but last June a member of staff asked me out right whether I was still going to New Zealand. I told them that I wasn't ever considering New Zealand and left it at that. Before I knew what was going on a number of staff started quizzing me. I approached the head, who denied ever telling anyone (like I believed him). I decided that from that point I would be totally honest about going, huge mistake. Since then I have been treated like a leper. I've been called into the office more times than I can count because people, well one in particular didn't like the way I spoke to her, looked at her etc, she has made sly little remarks about not caring anymore as I'm leaving. My life has been hell since June, I've spoken to the head and told him that her personal remarks are upsetting, he brushed it off as her being under a lot of stress. The most recent incident was put down to me being too enthusiatic but then in the same sentence the head said maybe I was getting complacent because I was leaving. If you can work that out, I'll buy you a pint.
So go ahead and tell your family, I'm sure after the initial shock they will all be supportive but choose wisely outside of your family.
Best of luck.
Sarah
My immediate family has been the only issue here
All the best of luck to you Sarah.
Cheers Paul
Feb 16th 2005, 4:09 am
#32
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: Telling family your plans, how far ahead should you say it?
Hi Paul,
Just seen you are in Guildford ! We are in Maidenhead. We are also waiting for house sale. Survey was done yesterday so finger's crossed we'll be out by March. We think we'll stay at family here for a few weeks and fly out about 25th April, staying in Singapore for 3 nights en route. We will initially stay with Mark's sister in Greenwood and then will rent for 6 months like you. I really would like to buy nearer the coast, within walking distance. Quite fancy Ocean Reef but it's a bit expensive. My friend is renting there at the mo, they've got a seafront mansion ! I think it's worth about $1.4 billion ! They are paying a lot of rent I think, but then I suppose compared to here it's reasonable. Keep in touch and maybe we'll meet up at Hillarys ! What sort of work to you do and have you got kids ? If I'm being nosy you don't have to answer !
Jo
Just seen you are in Guildford ! We are in Maidenhead. We are also waiting for house sale. Survey was done yesterday so finger's crossed we'll be out by March. We think we'll stay at family here for a few weeks and fly out about 25th April, staying in Singapore for 3 nights en route. We will initially stay with Mark's sister in Greenwood and then will rent for 6 months like you. I really would like to buy nearer the coast, within walking distance. Quite fancy Ocean Reef but it's a bit expensive. My friend is renting there at the mo, they've got a seafront mansion ! I think it's worth about $1.4 billion ! They are paying a lot of rent I think, but then I suppose compared to here it's reasonable. Keep in touch and maybe we'll meet up at Hillarys ! What sort of work to you do and have you got kids ? If I'm being nosy you don't have to answer !
Jo
