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-   -   so miserable...sorry.... (https://britishexpats.com/forum/australia-54/so-miserable-sorry-696113/)

EmmaKate Dec 10th 2010 1:54 pm

Re: so miserable...sorry....
 
Hi there
Firstly, it's a shame to see that your screen name "happy mum" is not accurate at the moment.

This won't probably help you very much but I'd like to say thanks. I've moved to Oz with my 15 month old and partner and am finding it hard and am homesick. It's strange as I've been away for 10 years (in NZ) and thisi is the first time I've been homesick. We are 4 hours out of Sydney and a bit isolated though!

I keep thinking that it would be easier if I was in the UK and your and other people's comments have been a help to me. I am lucky, my parents say that they would love me to be home but they believe this is a better place for us to bring up our daughter. They have painted a very black picture of the UK.

My advice is to focus on what's best for you. Some people just don't have the tools to communicate and it is very possible that your family are just hurting a little. Yes, I worry about moving with my daughter too and I can see their point but if you are very unhappy and unsettled it will only have a negative effect on the children. Time is a great healer and I'm sure things will come good for you. You are the only people who know in your hearts what will make you happy.

As for Christmas, try to make amends even if it hard. Life is very short and we all need to make the most of every day.

Sorry if I'm rambling on a bit, I do empathise as when I first left the UK nobody understood, they all thought I was running away and being irresponsible. Now, they see that it was the right thing for me to do and our relationship is better than ever.

Just try to focus on your family - only you know what's best. Keep your chin up and have a great Christmas!

happymum76 Dec 10th 2010 7:53 pm

Re: so miserable...sorry....
 
Hi Everyone,


Thanks so much for all your replies :D
Right, an update..I came home from school drop off on Wednesday to find my parents sitting outside the house in their car. Well lets just say there were tears and raised voices, but I got my point across and vice versa...and I think (for now) they fully understand our reasons for leaving. SO, the plan is to pack up and come back late Feb/early March!!!
I am so relieved, and am looking forward to xmas with my little family:)
xx

scotsista Dec 11th 2010 5:24 am

Re: so miserable...sorry....
 

Originally Posted by happymum76 (Post 9034269)
Hi Everyone,


Thanks so much for all your replies :D
Right, an update..I came home from school drop off on Wednesday to find my parents sitting outside the house in their car. Well lets just say there were tears and raised voices, but I got my point across and vice versa...and I think (for now) they fully understand our reasons for leaving. SO, the plan is to pack up and come back late Feb/early March!!!
I am so relieved, and am looking forward to xmas with my little family:)
xx

That sounds like a good bit of progress and hopefully things will continue to improve for all of you. :fingerscrossed:

quoll Dec 11th 2010 6:42 am

Re: so miserable...sorry....
 
I hope you repaid their loan to you before all of this and that you havent burned any bridges just in case you decide that all those things that made you leave Australia in the first place are still there and you want to move back to UK at some point. You never know when you will need your family network.

Probably a bit late now but have you thought of moving to a different place in UK - whole lot cheaper and may solve the problems. Good luck with whatever your next step is.

Pine Cone Dec 11th 2010 10:39 pm

Re: so miserable...sorry....
 

Originally Posted by quoll (Post 9035017)

Probably a bit late now but have you thought of moving to a different place in UK - whole lot cheaper and may solve the problems. Good luck with whatever your next step is.

I was just going to suggest the same. I know a few people who have ping ponged about a bit. One friend arrived here in NZ, felt homesick so went back to UK. Realised they'd made a mistake and came back here again, but then realised why they'd gone back to the UK last time. The last time they returned UK though, they decided to try a completely different part of UK and one of them changed career which made all the difference. OK, so I'm talking about NZ here rather than Oz, but the lessons learnt are still the same.

Good luck with your move though. I agree with others in that you can't live your life for other people or you'll spend your whole life wondering 'what if?'.


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