afclegend

Hi all,

Been long time since i have been on here but just wanted to post some things and get off my chest.

Myself and the wife lived in Sydney for 2 years and left last novemeber she was pregnant and we thought at the time it was good decision to leave come back to the UK and have the baby. The reasons for this were we didnt really have any friends in Sydney although just as we were leaving we did start to get to know some folk, we thought since we would have friends around and my family this would help with the baby.
We came back and we found our friends have moved on a bit and we dont see any of them, we do see my family and they do help when they can with the baby but its more like granny and grandad coming to visit help. The health system is not exactly much better here than in Australia. My wife works part-time but dosnt really enjoy it much in the job here

So anyway, i was offered the chance to come back to sydney in a managerial role, so more money etc.. my wife can get her position back where she worked before. My wife is happy to go, we will also now have my step-son living with us, we would be coming back on a 457 visa so we would need to pay for education he is 14.

For me the deicsion is very dificult part of me wants to go but another part dosnt since we just came back and my parents were happy were here and they also now have there first grandchild so its very difficult to take him away from them, they are not best pleased about us thinking about going back thinking be a mistake etc.. since we did moan a fair bit about Sydney when we were there so there points are very valid.

So i just dont know, been thinking lots last week sometimes yes i will go as i feel was a mistake to leave so soon should have given it more of a chance sometime no wont go, my problem is i want to keep everyone happy but this almost impossible.

Oh well thats it lol

Cheers,

Steve

roaringmouse

Only people you need to think about is your family - i.e. you, wife, children. If you think your job is a good opportunity for you, and your wife is happy then what's the problem?

sonlymewalter

You're a grown adult with a wife and kid. Man up and do what's best for you and your family mate - you don't have to please anyone else.

Good luck mate

paulry

It doesn't sound like there's a lot in it one way or another but draw a line down a piece of paper to make two columns. At the top of the first column put the word "pros" and at the other side put "cons". Then list the pluses and the minuses for moving back to Aus. You could even get your family to do the same. That should help you all decide. Good luck.

Bermudashorts

If you moaned a fair bit about Sydney when you were there, I am not sure why you are thinking of going back, especially on another temporary visa, which may mean coming back to UK again in due course.

I find that after you leave a place that you were not particularly happy in, the memory plays tricks and you forget about what you didn't like and look back and think it was not so bad really. Do that pros and cons list and remind yourself of what is what you didn't like about it last time.

not2old

Steve, I'll be blunt, in fact a smack around the head

To add to post#4 - Recall the reason why you emigrated the first time, then why you went back to the UK, the experience of it all - what you've learned from it.

Now an offer to return to OZ, which is likely because you've been searching or communicating with OZ employers & haven't left it behind you?.

You wont know till you do it, the 457 gives you a few years to live life somewhere else & you're likely young enough to pick up the pieces should it all not pan out & start life all over again.

Now I waffled you ...

My vote would be for you to stay in the UK & tell the employer in OZ 'thanks mate we'll stay put' Close the door & get on with your life in the UK

BTW, why does your profile state you are still in Sydney?

Geordie George

We moved to Sydney in 2005, moved backed to Blighty in 2007 and our first was born there in 2008. We moved back to Sydney in 2010. Our circumstances are perhaps different to yours in that we enjoyed Sydney the first time around. We are also quite partial to the UK. Like you, we partly moved back thinking family would be nice to have around our little one. But we also learned people had moved on. We made the decision to move back and were fortunate to both walk back into the jobs we'd left here. Things were, initially, more difficult the second time around, as we found out I was expecting our second just a few weeks after landing. But we eventually settled into our routines and things are going swimmingly now. You can be a very successful ping-ponger. (Mind, I caveat that: we'd always planned to return to the UK, even before initially moving - it wasn't a forever move the first time. Nor was the return to the UK, necessarily. That was a suck-it-and-see move. And we saw Aus in our future.) This is a forever move and we're both at peace with both our decision and the journey to get to it.

Don't try and please your family. Don't try and pretend it's a move for the better for the children. Do what works for you and your wife. Being here with children is different to being here without them. Personally, we're happier here with them. But we also enjoyed it here without them, so make of that what you will.

quoll

If it were just you guys then it would be an adventure, you can suck it and see. However, you are putting a 14 yr old into the equation and then it becomes trickier - can you not take the step son? You don't want to be buggering about with his education which, on a temporary visa, you could easily do. Once he is off the GCE/A levels roundabout it gets harder (but not impossible, just harder) to step back on it and you never know when you might be asked to leave the country (looking more likely with the clamp down on temp visa holders).

You didn't like it enough to stay the last time, I suspect the same may well happen again but it's your lives and you chase the best opportunity you have at the time.

paulry

The 14 year old's wellbeing (on a temp visa) is a strong reason not to do it.

afclegend

Hi all,

Thanks for all the views i shall take on board, it wasnt that we didnt enjoy Sydney first time we did, i think when i use the term "moaned" it was more related to the work really, but we did have a good time there. Mine would be an internal work transfer same as last time so i know what to expect, plus wont have same issues work wise this time as a few things have changed in past year.
I think We both want to go back and make a real go of it this time, we realize our errors from the first time and we know what we need to change.
Myself and the wife really need to sit again and decide whats best, i think were 70-30 in going at present, depending on what extra cash my employer offers if it right deal then this may sway the decision.

Thanks all again,

Steve

sonlymewalter

Good luck with whatever you decide mate

paulry

Best of luck to you Steve

Chortlepuss

I moved with a 12 year old - found it quite tough, the younger one (9 at the time) found it easier - but another point raised quite frequently on this forum is that with kids that age you can get in strife if they want him to get to university (actually in the UK or in Australia in your case) as you have to be resident in UK 3 years prior to start to count as a domestic student for fees - unless being on a 457, the universities are still willing to count you as resident for domestic fees purposes in the UK? As a 457 holder you are not entitled to domestic fees in Australia
As citizens, we are 'stuck' here with our younger one aged 16 in year 11... to make matters worse, he would love to go to a British Uni but unless he takes a 3 year gap in the UK, we cannot afford non domestic fees. The only sensible option seems to settle him in to uni here - Plenty of great universities in Oz, but we are ready to head back to the UK!

verystormy

Do remember the issues with a 457. There are a lot of us who do not recomend a 457 for a family.

scrubbedexpat098

we came here 6 years ago, on a 457, with a 12 and 9 y/o. If we'd shown caution due to the above 'issues' we'd never have done it. Life's one big risk taking exercise, if the voices in your head are telling you yes then listen to them. all the best