Go Back  British Expats > Living & Moving Abroad > Australia
Reload this Page >

Preparing children for the move!

Preparing children for the move!

Old Oct 16th 2006, 3:13 pm
  #1  
Newbie!
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Sep 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 183
Spikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to all
Default Preparing children for the move!

Any top tips?

I have a 6 year old son and a 3.5 year old daughter. So old enough to understand a fair bit, but also not much at the same time.

Now we have a proper date for going etc I need to start talking to them more about it. They know we're going and seem fairly excited (my son more so than my daughter - she has been quite worried I think which shows itself in different ways.. though she did matter of factly tell nursery staff that she was going to Australia 'forever'!) I've been keeping it quite low key up until now as it was all so uncertain but we've only got 6 weeks left in the UK now!

Would be interested to hear other people's experiences of the whole move with children - how they coped with it and so on.
Spikey is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 3:33 pm
  #2  
 
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 4,337
Perthforme is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Originally Posted by Spikey
Any top tips?

I have a 6 year old son and a 3.5 year old daughter. So old enough to understand a fair bit, but also not much at the same time.

Now we have a proper date for going etc I need to start talking to them more about it. They know we're going and seem fairly excited (my son more so than my daughter - she has been quite worried I think which shows itself in different ways.. though she did matter of factly tell nursery staff that she was going to Australia 'forever'!) I've been keeping it quite low key up until now as it was all so uncertain but we've only got 6 weeks left in the UK now!

Would be interested to hear other people's experiences of the whole move with children - how they coped with it and so on.
Just tell them / sell it to them , our nipper loves it here just turned 7 .
Had a rough time in school to start but moved school and much happier now !
Perthforme is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 4:52 pm
  #3  
Forum Regular
 
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Adelaide South Australia!!!
Posts: 203
foxychic is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Originally Posted by Perthforme
Just tell them / sell it to them , our nipper loves it here just turned 7 .
Had a rough time in school to start but moved school and much happier now !
This is the biggest fear for me and I am sure many parents, can I probe and ask how he had a rough time, was it easy to spot and obvious that moving schools would do the trick?
foxychic is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 5:11 pm
  #4  
Forum Regular
 
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Perth
Posts: 195
brickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nicebrickies wife is just really nice
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

[QUOTE=Spikey]Any top tips?

When I was a child I often moved due to my dad being in the services. Every time we moved my parents would sell the new area before hand, telling me and my siblings how wonderful it would be ..... However when we arrived at our new place, would would then be disappointed because when you are starting in a new school, living in a new town, do not have anything familiar around you, its really scary. Also when I moved from different areas within the UK, the 'local culture' would often be quite different. Eventually when you adapted you are often then as happy as you were before.

So I would advise that you do not oversell the place that you are going to, because you don't know that it is actually going to be wonderful, we all just hope that it will be.

Then also, if you end up not liking Australia or perhaps the town that you have moved to, and then you try and sell the new move, maybe they might not trust what you say quite as they did before.

I would focus on the fact that you, as a family are going on an adventure and that you are all together is what is important, and you want to make sure they have your support, and that you really hope it will be lovely.


I hope this makes sense and helps.
brickies wife is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 7:04 pm
  #5  
An Official Visa Holder
 
toon williams's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 999
toon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

We have just got back from a 5 week rekkie in Adelaide and both my kids loved it! They are 7 and 3. My 7 year old is very bright and so you cant fob her off with her questions, but we have sat her down and explained why and what we are doing and she having been on the rekkie is SOOooOOO up for it!! Every day my 3 year old asks if we are leaving for Australia today, so I can see although he really doesnt understand as long as his bike comes with him he would be happy to go anywhere!!

I think (my personal opinion) is especially with the older one, explain, get books and maps out (one I recommend is Are We There Yet, my daughter loved it all about an Ozzie Family, can get it from Amazon) and explain all about it, they like to feel grown up and included at that age.

I think you are like me lucky in that the kids are young enough to not really have to much of an idea about it, would dread having to tell teenagers we were moving to the other side of the world as I know how I would of reacted at that age!! They say kids adapt quicker than their parents, and i am sure that is right

Anyway good luck with everything!!
toon williams is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 8:01 pm
  #6  
Forum Regular
 
Joined: Apr 2006
Location: manchester
Posts: 59
angipipsqueak is a jewel in the roughangipipsqueak is a jewel in the roughangipipsqueak is a jewel in the roughangipipsqueak is a jewel in the rough
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

PLease can you tell me the author of the book are we there yet. I've been on Amazon and there are loads.

We have a 7 yeard old boy, who at the minute seems up for it, but who knows, how he's going to be when we get there.

Thanks Ange
angipipsqueak is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 8:21 pm
  #7  
Dreams can come true :)
 
Babycatcher's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2006
Location: Northamptonshire
Posts: 330
Babycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond reputeBabycatcher has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

This is something that can worry me... My son is 11 and although he likes the idea of an adventure he wants to go to Secondary school next year with all his friends. I am trying to be chilled about it - telling him about the fun that we can have as a family etc and I am sure that once he is settled there that it will all be fine (better than that - GREAT) but it is hard when you know our child is so unsure.
Just to add my 8 yr old daughter is really up for it!
Who knows by the time that we actually get it together my boy will probably love the idea and my daughter will have decided that it's not for her! :scared:
Babycatcher is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 8:23 pm
  #8  
Newbie!
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Sep 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 183
Spikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to all
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Thank you, I will have a look for that book - sounds ideal for both of them - my 3.5 year old is very bright and picks up on lots of things. My son is fairly laid back and quite young for his age. And yes, would dread taking them as teens - that's why we decided if we were going to do it we needed to do it now - we thought we'd be there by Xmas O4 but not to be.

Brickie'swife - what you say makes a lot of sense, really good idea about focussing on us going as a family (tbh I think that was what was worrying my little girl the most) for an adventure.

I'm sure they will adapt, but think I need to be prepared for a bit of challenging behaviour from both of them as they do so!
Spikey is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 9:06 pm
  #9  
Newbie!
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Sep 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 183
Spikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to allSpikey is a name known to all
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Originally Posted by angipipsqueak
PLease can you tell me the author of the book are we there yet. I've been on Amazon and there are loads.

We have a 7 yeard old boy, who at the minute seems up for it, but who knows, how he's going to be when we get there.

Thanks Ange
I think it could be this one by Alison Lester http://www.amazon.co.uk/Are-There-Ye...e=UTF8&s=books

I think I'll order it now...
Spikey is offline  
Old Oct 16th 2006, 10:14 pm
  #10  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 10,375
jad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond reputejad n rich has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

[QUOTE=brickies wife]
Originally Posted by Spikey
Any top tips?

When I was a child I often moved due to my dad being in the services. Every time we moved my parents would sell the new area before hand, telling me and my siblings how wonderful it would be ..... However when we arrived at our new place, would would then be disappointed because when you are starting in a new school, living in a new town, do not have anything familiar around you, its really scary. Also when I moved from different areas within the UK, the 'local culture' would often be quite different. Eventually when you adapted you are often then as happy as you were before.

So I would advise that you do not oversell the place that you are going to, because you don't know that it is actually going to be wonderful, we all just hope that it will be.

Then also, if you end up not liking Australia or perhaps the town that you have moved to, and then you try and sell the new move, maybe they might not trust what you say quite as they did before.

I would focus on the fact that you, as a family are going on an adventure and that you are all together is what is important, and you want to make sure they have your support, and that you really hope it will be lovely.


I hope this makes sense and helps.

That is probably the best advice I have ever read on here, karma sent.

So many people do such a "job" on the kids of selling it, promising them stuff, and telling them everything will be better its no wonder so many kids have such a hard time settling when the reality of mum and dad stressed, jobless, renting, leaving family behind, missing friends, and the general stress of anything from arriving in australia mid summer to dad not finding working for 6 months hits!

Your advice is spot on.
jad n rich is offline  
Old Oct 17th 2006, 2:24 am
  #11  
BE Forum Addict
 
Luma's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: WA
Posts: 1,784
Luma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond reputeLuma has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

It is a great book. My eldest who was just 4yrs old thought we'd be living in a campervan in Australia.

Soon after we arrived I found a second hand toy campervan at a baby shop

Looks like this:


(74682 Fisher-price 1997)

Now all we need is a real campervan and our kids will be in heaven!


Originally Posted by Spikey
Thank you, I will have a look for that book - sounds ideal for both of them - my 3.5 year old is very bright and picks up on lots of things. My son is fairly laid back and quite young for his age. And yes, would dread taking them as teens - that's why we decided if we were going to do it we needed to do it now - we thought we'd be there by Xmas O4 but not to be.

Brickie'swife - what you say makes a lot of sense, really good idea about focussing on us going as a family (tbh I think that was what was worrying my little girl the most) for an adventure.

I'm sure they will adapt, but think I need to be prepared for a bit of challenging behaviour from both of them as they do so!
Luma is offline  
Old Oct 17th 2006, 2:48 am
  #12  
Crazy Cat Lady
 
moneypenny20's Avatar
 
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,044
moneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond reputemoneypenny20 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Originally Posted by Spikey
Any top tips?

I have a 6 year old son and a 3.5 year old daughter. So old enough to understand a fair bit, but also not much at the same time.

Now we have a proper date for going etc I need to start talking to them more about it. They know we're going and seem fairly excited (my son more so than my daughter - she has been quite worried I think which shows itself in different ways.. though she did matter of factly tell nursery staff that she was going to Australia 'forever'!) I've been keeping it quite low key up until now as it was all so uncertain but we've only got 6 weeks left in the UK now!

Would be interested to hear other people's experiences of the whole move with children - how they coped with it and so on.
Considering the ages of your kids I don't think you have to do much more than you have already. Don't care hold old a child is, they rarely understand the concept of time so promising them you will go back and visit at a point in time or move back is irrelevant at that age. Show them pics, tell them you are excited but a bit scared and that it's fine to have both of those emotions. Don't promise them the world and don't get upset if just before you leave one of them decides they can't possibly leave nanna or whoever.

Stay chilled, don't let them see you get stressed. To my mind young children don't worry about stuff, they feed off the vibes of their parents.

Good luck with the move.
moneypenny20 is offline  
Old Oct 17th 2006, 10:05 am
  #13  
An Official Visa Holder
 
toon williams's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 999
toon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond reputetoon williams has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Originally Posted by Spikey
I think it could be this one by Alison Lester http://www.amazon.co.uk/Are-There-Ye...e=UTF8&s=books

I think I'll order it now...
Yes thats the one!!
toon williams is offline  
Old Oct 17th 2006, 10:53 am
  #14  
Forum Regular
 
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 130
martynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nicemartynm is just really nice
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Originally Posted by moneypen20
Considering the ages of your kids I don't think you have to do much more than you have already. Don't care hold old a child is, they rarely understand the concept of time so promising them you will go back and visit at a point in time or move back is irrelevant at that age. Show them pics, tell them you are excited but a bit scared and that it's fine to have both of those emotions. Don't promise them the world and don't get upset if just before you leave one of them decides they can't possibly leave nanna or whoever.

Stay chilled, don't let them see you get stressed. To my mind young children don't worry about stuff, they feed off the vibes of their parents.

Good luck with the move.
It's all good advice, especially having a 6 and 4 year old who can't wait to go. Really worried we'll dissappoint them (or ourselves now I come to mention it !)
martynm is offline  
Old Oct 17th 2006, 7:39 pm
  #15  
BE Enthusiast
 
seasprite's Avatar
 
Joined: Apr 2006
Location: Dorset
Posts: 599
seasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond reputeseasprite has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Preparing children for the move!

Our 3 year old seems more clued up than we give him credit for! We have tried not to discuss it much and let our frustrations be known as it is such a long process. Once we had the visas we talked about going to Australia, the plane and that it will be like holiday for a while. He was mainly concerned that there would be rides and slopes to run down. Oh and a school, but he wants to stay at school for longer please! We have said the sea is nearby and life will be as it is here after Christmas, same old routine!
seasprite is offline  

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright © 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.