PlymouthL

Hi. This is my first posting on this site, I only discovered the site about three days ago, but I am really hoping that somebody might be able to help us out!

About a year ago my husband was offered a 3 year contract - 2 of which are at the Univeristy of Wollongong ( and the 3rd year back in the UK). It is a research post, so we can go out on the Visiting Academic visa. Everything seems quite straight forward - apart from our decision!!

We cannot decide whether to go or not. Going means him giving up a permanent job - a job that he waited a long time for due to so few in his area of research - we have two small girls 3 and 1 - we could go and have a wonderful time (we have been to Oz a few times previously not Wollongong but Perth and Sydney on shorter contracts). He is supposed to be starting out there on July 1st and we still can't decide if we should stay in Plymouth - which isn't great - but we have made great friends and feel quite settled - or risk it all to go to Oz for a couple of years to possibly have to return to UK with no chance of getting a permanent job again!

We have had months of sleepless nights and arguments over what is best and I just wondered if anyone could give us some ideas about what you might do.

Sorry for waffling on, I hope I haven't bored you all. Thanks.

grahampaula

Hello and welcome to the site. This decision is only one that can be made by you and you OH. If you are not happy with life at the moment where you are, I would say that there is no halm in trying. It all depends on your OH and his decision about his job. You do not want to say in a few years time - If only we had taken the opportunity when is arose, and what it this and that........etc. You only get one life so do what is best for you and your family.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

MANDS14

I agree with grahampaula. I think it's not often in life you get opportunities to do something different and I would grab it with both hands. I would imagine the experience will only enrich your lives and although giving up security is very scary at the end of the day life is an adventure!

We are a family with 3 young children 4,3 and 8 months and we are hoping to move to Adelaide having never been to Aus before and it will mean my husband giving up his well paid job and our lovely home and some great friends. It's nerve wracking but I don't want to get to 60 and think I wish we'd had some adventures in life rather than always playing safe.

I would say go for it! Best of Luck whatever you decide

PlymouthL

Thank you - that is what others have said to us - we do keep saying that you only live once and you dont get a second chance - I think its just that most people stay in their safety zones and dont jump out - do you mind if I ask how easy did you find your decision to go to Brisbane? Thanks Lucy

grahampaula

It was a tough decision and having never been to Oz before, it still is. We have talked long and hard, and still do (last minute jitters and fear of the unknown). We are looking on it as a big adventure, but one that we all want to share and don't get me wrong, I am sure that it will throw up lots more emotional roller coasters along the way. We are also in a nice "Safety zone" here in the UK, good well paid jobs,a nice house and great family and friends, but we also want a better future for our son (who is 8). I know that the worst is probably still to come, leaving family and friends etc but we are determined to make it work and will tackle one problem at a time.
Where are you hoping to go? (Sorry if you mentioned this previously I am very tired and stressed tonight) oh and I am now on my second glass of wine lol.

jonah38

Hi

[SIZE="6"]LIFE IS NOT A REHEARSAL

You get one chance and only one chance.

good luck

PlymouthL

We are due to go at the end of June- due to our indecision we have done nothing yet - book flights, or get visa etc - its getting ridiculous we have never been this indecisive about anything!

I do agree with the one chance in life idea and that is what I keep coming back to during my moments of stress! Its good to know that other people worry about leaving things behind, I am so torn between real excitment and absolute terror!

Australia_bound?

Is a difficult choice you have! Can't offer advice, other than do what is in the best interest of you and your family, but I wish you well

JAJ

Why don't the university want to offer him a permanent position (and sponsor for a permanent visa)?

If you don't want to uproot yourselves without the security of permanency in Australia, you probably need to do some hard negotiating on this point.

Geordie George

Welcome to BE.

I'd say do some research. And then some more. Work out what you're wanting from a move to Aus and then see whether the place that you're considering offers those things for you.

If you have strong family/friends ties, are happy in the area that you live and have good jobs, a move to Aus might turn out to be a nightmare - particularly if you're not 100% committed to it. It's a long way from anywhere - not easy for flying visits back - so it can feel isolated. Especially if homesickness kicks in - and you should never, ever underestimate how painful that can be. You may end up wondering why you sacrificed your comfortable UK life for something that doesn't add up - socially, financially etc.

All I'm trying to say is that it's a big decision and not one to be left to chance. You need to have your eyes wide open as to what to expect and what you hope to get from your experience. Particularly if you think that, long-term, your OH's employment prospects are better in the UK (or elsewhere).

Just imagine your day to day lives (unsuprisingly, it probably doesn't feature the beach so much as the washing and the shopping and the ironing and the ...!) and don't get sucked into the bigger, better, cheaper, sunnier mindset. Aus has a lot going for it (despite what you might think, I happen to really like the place ), but it's not utopia. So long as you're realistic, it can offer a lot.

gjs

Could your OH take a career break with his present job while you tried it out here?

Kernow1

One thing I can say is that Wollongong is a beautiful place - beautiful beaches and the town has been upgraded and the whole place smartened up in the last 4 yrs or so.

However, it is a big decision and only you and your family can make that.

Good luck.

(I'd go today if I could talk my other half into it! :-) )

sambo76

I agree you should definately find out what the possibility of a more permanent arrangement is. If there is no chance and you have to return in 2 years and then try and find another way back out again for permanent residence, it seems like a really poor offer considering your family...
HOWEVER, if there is any way to get out, one comment that always crops up is this: IT'S BETTER TO REGRET SOMETHING YOU HAVE DONE THAN SOMETHING YOU HAVEN'T! ie- GO FOR IT!

smiths

Nothing is ever black and white. For almost everyone, coming to Australia is a calculated risk - the ones that take the plunge think it's worth it.

I think most would see your situation as an ideal opportunity to try Australia for two years with a guaranteed return back to the UK for the third year. Then you can make your minds up for certain when your back in UK. Two years in the grand scheme of things isn't long and if your friends are good friends they will welcome you back.

The main sticking point seems to be your OH's job and if he gave it up now, whether he would be able to secure the same sort of job when he got back to the UK. However, if you're in Oz for two years and you absolutely love it, there may be similar opportunities over here?

At the end of the day, you have to weigh it all up and decide one way or another. Good luck in whatever you decide.

PlymouthL

Thank you all so much for all of your comments, they have been much appreciated. All of the thoughts that you have said we have also discussed. My OH job is definately the sticking point as he is a research ecologist and there really is a very small niche for that work within the Academic world (I am an infant school teacher and work isn't as difficult to get). I think that we are the sort of people who can take the risk of going BUT there is something to be said for sticking with life here in Plymouth (even though we cant cope with the idea of being here forever!) and maybe waiting for something else more permanent to come up. On the other hand Wollongong does sound great... you can see how indecisive I am! Anymore thoughts would be hugely welcome.