Morning all,

I know this really belongs in the Barbie (and it's there too) but it relates to many people who may only check this forum, so apologies, but it's here too...


As those of you that followed the BundyMum story may remember, good old BM entrusted me with the diaries from the time of her illness and told me to 'do something useful' with them. By which she meant, write a book.

She was constantly striving to get the message out about hospices and being open about cancer and what it's really like to live (and die) with it. But she was also very keen to emphasise that cancer affects many people beyond the person who has it. She called it the ripple effect.

I can't face the diaries just yet, at least, not all of them (I've read a few pages) but from my own point of view, my only existing personal record of what it is like to have a terminally ill relative is contained on this forum. These pages were my diary.

So, what I'm hoping to do is to use the things I wrote here to feed into this book. But due to copyright etc I need to ask a favour - in principle, would anyone object to me using some of their postings in the book, just to give the context of my replies etc. If I do go ahead with this, I will be asking each individual member to give permission - this is just a general yay or nay.

I may never get round to writing it - it may simply be too hard - but I'd like to have a stab as I owe it to dear old BundyMum.

BTW, it's BM's memorial service on 22nd April..not going to be easy.

Not sure I ever said anything worthwhile or "quote worthy" but if you find something, feel free to use it however you wish. I'd probably leave it a while but it seems like a great idea and a brilliant memorial to her

My grandfather died of cancer in January. We were pretty close. The worst feeling was guilt, because I was glad he wasnt suffering anymore not grief for his passing - if that makes sense. Any way you find therapeutic to help you cope with all the emotions swirling around inside you has got to be good. If you can manage it - a book, a pamphlet, a leaflet, even a single post on a web forum that helps just one person is a triumph.

Thanks Benny.

Mum and I talked about the whole idea of a book for much of the two years she was ill. She really desparately wanted to get something out there, and she wrote articles for the paper, was interviewed for the local news, campaigned for funds for the hospice and met all sorts of royalty and dignitaries when they visited the island to harass them about hospice care.

So it's not so much for me, it's for her, because if she'd been able to stick around long enough, she'd be writing it, not me.

I rarely say nay to a lady

Nope, more like 'rooooaaaarrrrr' eh Bixie

hi bundy, how are you hun? that is such a fantastic thing you're going to do, well done and i hope you get the strength soon to look back at those wonderful diaries, go for it, BM would be so extremely proud

Hi Debbie,

I'm not too bad, thanks. Went through a bit of a bad patch a few weeks back as I went over what is commonly believed to be the three month hump. Better now though, and will probably be more so after the memorial service.

It's very early days for any book type thing yet (feel embarrassed even calling it a book!). But it was something mum was very keen on and she collated a lot of information for it, so I'll give it a go, along with the help of my family and the hospice.

cant remember if I said owt usefull, but no worries with me for usin anything I said..............I hope all goes well on the 22nd

Take Care
H
XX

Our thoughts will be with you and Bundy Mum on the 22nd.
Best wishes,
SD.

If you want to include any of my drivel you go right ahead!