aston man

to be honest i thought i would write this because it might help someone and i seem to have made a mistake somewhere along the line...

i never for a second thought that this move would effect my little one louis,who is three,i thought he would be the one out of the three of us that would find it the most easy to adapt..

but i was wrong. out of us all i think he has been the one most upset by the move...he seems to be a completly different child..he has turned into a total terror..i dont think us being in three different houses since christmas has done him any good at all..

we went to buy him a bed today and he was over the moon ,he keeps going on about his new bedroom..and all that he wants in it..

i hope i can get him settled soon...

i would just like to advise,if you dont mind, take a little time to talk to your young ones about the move..

any thoughts?

aston

tum

I think you did a good thing letting him choose his own bedroom, I guess it makes it a bit more his 'own space' for him. I hope he settles in soon Aston. You know he's being a little pain in the *ss (although still cute ) because he doesn't know how to express himself, but that's hard on you too, so a compliment to you for being a supportive parent

Our son turns 6 in October and we talk about moving (which is easier because he's a bit older) regularly. He decided we should sell his car bed and that he would like a boat bed in Australia. He does want to take his planets (hanging above his bed) and playmobil and some other toys but we let him decide as much as possible.

So my advice would be .. let your kid(s) decide on issues that they can decide about and give them a feeling of involvement and responsibility. And all I can say for now is that we haven't made the move yet, so we'll have to see if this approach works.

The one thing I'm a bit worried about is that he has to learn to speak English and that I hope that kids at school will be nice to him and he gets friends soon.

Take care Aston and good luck with your little one!

Miranda xx

Gems

Thanks for your post.

My youngest is two years old. We are doing the last bit of packing as fly out next weekend.

My daughter is being a bit panicky this morning and running around grabbing soft toys, crying about her dolls etc. Generally unsettled. Shippers come on Wednesday so doing last bit of toys and things.

Think she doesnt know whats going on and its difficult to explain.

Im a little worried she will be unsettled in OZ too. To be honest Ive been more worried about the teen but maybe we need to keep an eye on the toddler too.

GEMS

Hutch

I've said it before and I'll say it again - people trot out the glibbest bullshit about kids and emigrating. Simply saying, "They're so adaptable," doesn't make it true.

aston man

hutch,,if you dont mind me saying mate,i would like to quote from an old friend of mine...

"you cant buy experience from the shops",............some of the long term posters on here talk a lot of sence....

i must admit that,its a sad fact but sometimes the only way to learn is by your mistakes,i dont think i could of done any more to protect my kids..
i am sure he will come through but it is hard on them,there is no dought about that...

Cheetah7

I wonder if they insist that they are adaptable, purely because they want them to be.

Geelong Gent

No because they are brought up that way

aston man

hi darling,of course we do ,we always see what we want to see,

most of us move over here in search of a better life four our kids.
i belive i have done just that,but only time will tell..

jerzo

Hopefully now he has a routine he will adjust and settle in to his new life ( fingers crossed!!)

We are due to fly out in 14 SEPT and we have 4 boys 15,9,7 & 15 months and i'm dreading their reactions to the whole process, they are all totally different so when one is ok with something the other isn't and so on :curse:

We are renting for 10 wks beforehand just to add to the upheaveal
so like you it's a few places before we settle down ( cue lots of tears,stress and tantrums and then the kids!!)

we have involved them every step of the way but I don't think anything can really prepare you for the huge change, just wait for all my ranting after we arrive

Let me know how he settles in the next few weeks x

Zoe

Jaycee1

Are you in a rental M? I am sure as soon as he has continuity he will be fine.
Moving will unsettle him and you are doing the right thing of letting him choose his bed. Is most of his stuff in transit? When his bed arrives and his belongings he will probably settle down.
Some kids just like routine and sameness.
It will all work out soon.
Sending K for all of you x
J x

sme

I found structuring a familiar routine the best way of settling my kids when we moved. Kids are creatures of habit and need that structure to feel secure. Your youngest is probably experiencing loads of new stuff and his brain has gone into meltdown - it does settle down though

aston man

yes were in a caravan,tonight were with the outlaws...never mind two weeks and we might be in the house....

northernbird

My daughter almost 5 now was the same. Your son will soon settle, I promise. Most of the Hillarys girls will tell you my daughter is quite settled now.

Jaycee1

Does the M-I-L look like Ned kelly?
J x

vickys

Aston,
I know its not exactly the same but i deal with looked after children each day who have been dragged kicking and screaming away from their parents and everything they know, differnet neighbourhood and everything, making the children feel as though they have made a few really big decisions always goes down really well but most of make all your littlies feel involved, it doesn't matter if they are only 3 if they dont' feel involved they will kick off.

I'm by no means an expert and we're only just ready to send off our visa but iknow my daugher is going to take it really hard dispite the fact that she says she isn't bothered at the moment but i'm sure that your little one will settledown especially with the new bedroom that's been designed all by himself and not his parents!!