Schmeva

Hello all,

We are almost definitely going to be emmigrating to Sydney from London in the next 2-3 years where my husband has an office that will need him. I am Australian - born and bred in Perth and have been in the UK for 10 years.

We have a 18 month old and hope to have another one by the time we move, so I am curious to know how other ex-pats with babies/kids have settled into the mummy and baby groups in Australia. I have found most British mummies to be very welcoming and have made many friends this way and I hope to do the same when we move.

I have heard not very nice things about how some of the Aussie mums can be a little unfriendly and although I am Aussie myself I would not like to have to struggle that way, especially when you are trying to make friends for the sake of your little ones!

Hopefully we will settle in without too many hiccups but as this is a big part of my life at the moment, I do get concerned.

Any replies welcome!

Thanks

Kingseat

I went to a local group a couple of times and if I am honest I didn't like it!

A couple of the mums made me feel welcome but the majority didn't. It was almost like I was stepping into their own little private club and not a group open to all parents with their children no matter what age. My son was also the youngest at 14 months and he wasn't treated very well by some of the other children.....and they were not disciplined either.

So all in, not a very good experience! I have since found a daycare for him a couple of mornings a week where he seems happy.

Depending on what happens on the work front will depend on any new ventures to toddlers groups!

itigo

I go to a few groups, and if it wasn't for meeting friendly Mums I would have NO friends!

My best friend I met through my little girl chatting to her sister's little girl at a park. She in turn invited me to a playgroup (Church one but no agenda at all) where I now have several other friends. All friendly, none stand offish. We meet up outside of playgroup too. Obviously it took a few weeks to feel really comfortable, but if you put the effort in, it's worth it.

I take my little girl swimming and am now meeting up with another family out of swim time as we get on well by the side of the pool!

Have another good friend from ballet and we do playdates etc.

It is hard to get up courage if you aren't used to doing it, but it's amazing how quickly you forget your shyness. There's always something to talk about with kids! Even at play places in malls, Mums and Dads will strike up conversations. Then you can ask for suggestions of where's good to go, groups etc and you're in!

I have to say that I have noticed some discipline issues, but you'd find this in the UK (anywhere!) really. I always make a point of talking loudly to my child in those circumstances telling her what she is doing nicely - waiting patiently, keeping her hands to herself, being quiet etc and the other child/parent soon cottons on!!

Don't worry, Mums over here haven't all got 2 heads!

Rosscarbery

There are always plenty of newly arrived expats with little ones who are just as eager as you are to make friends, so although you may not want to only hang out with expats it's a good way to start!

I personally have always loathed mother and baby groups in any part of the world so can't comment on those, but we're in Sydney and there are endless kids' activities you can go to where you will meet people. If you are looking at not coming for 2-3 years your eldest will be old enough for all the music/gym stuff, or you may put him/her in pre-school where you are bound to meet people with younger children. I met one of my closest friends here at my daughter's first ballet class where we just liked the look of each other and got chatting outside, turned out we both had older boys the same age etc. etc. and we now hang out as families a lot. If you want friends and you are prepared to make an effort you'll find them! I find people much friendlier here than in the UK.

overthemoon

was that the one in Woodvale? i just recently moved into the suburb and made some inquires about the playgroup.

Which daycare do you have him in if you don't mind me asking?

Petals

Long time ago for me but I did not find them that friendly. Cliques I would say. Also found talking about babies 24/7 very boring but that is me even though I had two at the time.

I found that once they were at school I made friends with similar minded people.

Pomster

I joined a mum's group when daughter was 7 weeks old....I see them now but they are pretty cliquey. 12 mums in the group.
One or two are nice and v friendly, but if I moved away, I doubt anyone would keep in touch or even notice!

I have met mums other ways and my closest friend I met via a breastfeeding clinic!

Kingseat

I'll PM you! Just in case!

mabozar

You get that any where in the world!

Carol

Kingseat

Never said you couldn't!

Schmeva

Thanks for all the replies - I have to say it was what I was expecting to be honest. I think you have to work hard at new friendships wherever you are, UK or Australia so I am more than prepared to do that. It is just the cliqueyness that annoys me because I know it exists, especially in Oz. My Mum had to endure other unfriendly mothers when we were babies and it really put her off going to these kind of groups. Perhaps I am worrying uneccessarily about our upcoming move - I just dont want to be homesick (which is ridiculous considering I am an Aussie, but love the UK!!!)

HEL

I attend a mums group (im the only pom so far but one german girl too) and have to say its been great for me - obviously you meet some people who you get on better with than others but its generally not clicky and i have some fab friends. I did attend an expats one but found that not suitable for me. The local one also meant we have local friends so can see frequently as less travel. I agree, you have to make the effort and you tend to know instantly whether it is right for you or not.