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An issue causing great stress ... spiders

An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Old Jun 30th 2005, 4:16 pm
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Default An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Its one issue I dont quite know how to help my wife feel better about.

Spiders are the world over, and yet one of the concerns that my wife has about emigrating to Australia is the spiders.

I have tried several approaches to help with this, from experience I can tell you what doesnt work.

Openness. Doesnt work. My recommendation would not be to be honest about the number, the size or the toxicity of the spiders in Australia. I noticed this awareness wasnt appearing to help when I graphically described the length and hairyness of the huntsman spider's legs and saw my wifes lower jaw hit the floor and the tears start. Suggesting that spiders werent anything to fear because in a "spider-on-snake' fight a snake would win hands down did nothing to stop the tears, at least i dont think it did... there were a number of closed doors between me and my wife by that point.

Comedy relief. This also doesnt work. Fake spider on the car dashboard, a rendition of "Redback on the toilet seat", feigning a deadly spider bite. None of these efforts did anything to help with my wifes phobia (can I call it that dear?). Although surprised to discover this myself, this is apparently the worst approach to take when addressing this issue.

Casual dismissal. This was met with limited success. That was a lie. It was met with no success at all. Casual statements as you nonchalantly take another mouthful of dinner like "sure a redback bite can kill you in 2-3 hours, but look how small they are!" and "The biggest huntsman I have ever seen would cover this plate and their bites hurt like a [email protected]%#er, but the venom isnt gonna kill you".

Growing up in Australia we just seem to subliminally learn which are the nasty buggars not to poke a stick at and the like. We absorb lessons in such a way that so few people ever get spider bites, snake bites, shark attacks, jellyfish stings, etc etc etc (obviously japanese tourists and immigrating brits are excluded from the statistics ).

So at the end of this long winded post I am finding myself at a loss, still, as to how to comfort my wife with an issue she clearly finds disturbing and would like to put it to all of you to share your experiences/lessons learned/steps taken in addressing what must be a wider issue than simply with my wife.

Thanks in advance.

< a big to Sid_s>
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 5:32 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by CheekyWeetus
Its one issue I dont quite know how to help my wife feel better about.

Spiders are the world over, and yet one of the concerns that my wife has about emigrating to Australia is the spiders.

I have tried several approaches to help with this, from experience I can tell you what doesnt work.

Openness. Doesnt work. My recommendation would not be to be honest about the number, the size or the toxicity of the spiders in Australia. I noticed this awareness wasnt appearing to help when I graphically described the length and hairyness of the huntsman spider's legs and saw my wifes lower jaw hit the floor and the tears start. Suggesting that spiders werent anything to fear because in a "spider-on-snake' fight a snake would win hands down did nothing to stop the tears, at least i dont think it did... there were a number of closed doors between me and my wife by that point.

Comedy relief. This also doesnt work. Fake spider on the car dashboard, a rendition of "Redback on the toilet seat", feigning a deadly spider bite. None of these efforts did anything to help with my wifes phobia (can I call it that dear?). Although surprised to discover this myself, this is apparently the worst approach to take when addressing this issue.

Casual dismissal. This was met with limited success. That was a lie. It was met with no success at all. Casual statements as you nonchalantly take another mouthful of dinner like "sure a redback bite can kill you in 2-3 hours, but look how small they are!" and "The biggest huntsman I have ever seen would cover this plate and their bites hurt like a [email protected]%#er, but the venom isnt gonna kill you".

Growing up in Australia we just seem to subliminally learn which are the nasty buggars not to poke a stick at and the like. We absorb lessons in such a way that so few people ever get spider bites, snake bites, shark attacks, jellyfish stings, etc etc etc (obviously japanese tourists and immigrating brits are excluded from the statistics ).

So at the end of this long winded post I am finding myself at a loss, still, as to how to comfort my wife with an issue she clearly finds disturbing and would like to put it to all of you to share your experiences/lessons learned/steps taken in addressing what must be a wider issue than simply with my wife.

Thanks in advance.

< a big to Sid_s>
What a great post... made me laugh....but then got me wandering cos we don't like them either. :scared: :scared:

So what about taking your lovely wife to see a hypnotherapistto see if they can help at all....

You never know, may work.
We aren't there yet so can't share any experiences Im afraid....

Good Luck and let us know how you get on

Ang
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 5:55 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by Rich and Angie
What a great post... made me laugh....but then got me wandering cos we don't like them either. :scared: :scared:

So what about taking your lovely wife to see a hypnotherapistto see if they can help at all....

You never know, may work.
We aren't there yet so can't share any experiences Im afraid....

Good Luck and let us know how you get on

Ang
Hehehe, took me ages to work out what a Hypnothe Rapistto was

I was still reeling form the possibilities of Kmacs "Camcorder+Travel+Property business opportunity".

Oooh oooh, where do i sign? Who do i make the cheque out too?



My next attempt to calm the phobic waters was shock therapy, however I am advised that three crates of "5000 assorted australian spiders" may take some time to clear customs. Probably got a banana or something in there that shouldnt be.
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 6:06 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

i can only speak from experience.we took a six week vacation to the western suburbs of brisbane .i felt exactly like your wife.i imagined that when i awoke in the morning there would be a huge spider sat there looking at me ,you know the ones tatooed and looking for trouble.but i didnt see a one.tell a lie i did see half a dozen red backs but that was only because our host was gracious enough to show me how to find one.its the same as the uk ,if you want to find one look for a web or in the dingiest part of the garage.samo samo.out in the country though its a different matter,dont put the blanket down till youve had a good look.as for suburban spiders its all about life style i think if you let your garden over grow and dont tidy the bushes who knows.fly screens are magic,they keep absolutely everything out appart from those tiny ants that end up in the sugar. .if you go out the door close the bloody thing behind you.if you move into a property that needs some work there are strong garlic type repelants that work for a few weeks.well they would wouldnt they ,who the bloody hell would live next to garlic factory .
hope this helps,this only my opinion as i saw it.

tracy
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 7:02 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Hiya,

Has your wife actually been to Australia? It might make her feel a lot better if she sees the reality v's her perception. It amazes me (I'm not dismissing the fear as such, but I am truly amazed even after living in the UK for 10 years) the wide variety of myths and fears that the Brits seem to have about Aussie wildlife (spiders, sharks, snakes)...and having escorted a few British friends back home on holidays etc over the years I can safely say that every single one of them later commented on how they were amazed at not seeing any of these "dangerous creatures" they'd been fearing. As someone else said, we had to actively go on an expedition to find them, and even then were unsuccessful!

Actually, I know I've jsut said I'm not dismissing the fear but, really, she is being a tad silly, don't you think?

Michelle
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 7:28 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by michellemac
Hiya,

Has your wife actually been to Australia? It might make her feel a lot better if she sees the reality v's her perception. It amazes me (I'm not dismissing the fear as such, but I am truly amazed even after living in the UK for 10 years) the wide variety of myths and fears that the Brits seem to have about Aussie wildlife (spiders, sharks, snakes)...and having escorted a few British friends back home on holidays etc over the years I can safely say that every single one of them later commented on how they were amazed at not seeing any of these "dangerous creatures" they'd been fearing. As someone else said, we had to actively go on an expedition to find them, and even then were unsuccessful!

Actually, I know I've jsut said I'm not dismissing the fear but, really, she is being a tad silly, don't you think?

Michelle
My wife has spent approx 12 weeks in Australia over the last few years, we actually had our honeymoon in Australia, sailing the whitsundays several years ago.

I guess at some level I think that a fear this strong of something like a spider is a little silly, however if my wife had thought that my fear of heights was a little silly then I would still be cowering in tears on the 114th step of the East leg of the Eiffel Tower today. Not a good day for "Aussies on Tour" I can tell you. I went from proudly carrying an aussie flag with the intent of waving it from the top to having the flag wedged solidly in the bottom of my bag and faking a german accent.

You have (in a way) highlighted my point. As Australians we do take things like this in our stride because we grew up with it, and somehow we just learned what not to do/where not to go/on what not to tread to avoid things like this.

Worst case, I have heard that a person developes an immunity to a spiders venom after the 7th or 8th bite, and as far as I am concerned that means the glass is most definitely half full.
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 10:03 pm
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 10:09 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

I hated spiders b4 i had a year in Aus you soon get used to them really !

Just tell her to SNAP OUT OF IT !!!!
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Old Jun 30th 2005, 10:13 pm
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Smile Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by Jim2004



Come on that must be a record or something....How long did it take for someone to post the HUNTSMAN SPIDER wiping its AR$E.....someone call
MORRIS MCQUERTOR and ROR CASTLE..quick


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Old Jun 30th 2005, 11:53 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by Jim2004



No good can come of this post :scared: , only one thing for it...
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Old Jul 1st 2005, 3:03 am
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

I know someone who was bitten by a redback. It bit him on his side (got inside his shirt I guess). He didnt even know he had been bitten by a spider till he started feeling numbness in his arm. After a while he thought he ought to go to the hospital to get it checked out. The doctor had a look, confirmed it was a redback bite. The doc decided that since the symptoms weren't that bad, the bite victim could just go home. No anti-venom, no drugs, etc etc.
Sure - redbacks can kill you - if you're very tiny or if you're old and not too healthy, but for an average person they don't pose a death threat.

Since finding this out I'm not so scared of them any more.

Giant spider stories still scare me - but to be honest, the biggest huntsman I've seen so far had a leg diameter of about 4-5 inches. Nothing like the toilet paper spider in the post above.

W.

Recovering arachnophobe.
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Old Jul 1st 2005, 3:35 am
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by Wanderlust
I know someone who was bitten by a redback. It bit him on his side (got inside his shirt I guess). He didnt even know he had been bitten by a spider till he started feeling numbness in his arm. After a while he thought he ought to go to the hospital to get it checked out. The doctor had a look, confirmed it was a redback bite. The doc decided that since the symptoms weren't that bad, the bite victim could just go home. No anti-venom, no drugs, etc etc.
Sure - redbacks can kill you - if you're very tiny or if you're old and not too healthy, but for an average person they don't pose a death threat.

Since finding this out I'm not so scared of them any more.

Giant spider stories still scare me - but to be honest, the biggest huntsman I've seen so far had a leg diameter of about 4-5 inches. Nothing like the toilet paper spider in the post above.

W.

Recovering arachnophobe.
l did some research and no one has died from a spider bite in OZ since 1980, while one or two people die each year from bee and wasp stings.

Last edited by aussie73; Jul 1st 2005 at 3:47 am.
 
Old Jul 1st 2005, 7:17 am
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by CORKER
Come on that must be a record or something....How long did it take for someone to post the HUNTSMAN SPIDER wiping its AR$E.....someone call
MORRIS MCQUERTOR and ROR CASTLE..quick


CORKER
Sorry if this one is also revisiting old ground, but this photo following is quite spectacular. Almost makes it look cute and surely worth a revisit even if it has been linked to before.
http://www.pbase.com/john_down_under/image/29333460

The story under this one may help you keep rational if you see one of these things. This guy obviously wasn't that keen on spiders either, but it sounds like it didn't exactly jump around biting him.
http://www.pbase.com/john_down_under/image/33485128
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Old Jul 1st 2005, 12:29 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by aussie73
l did some research and no one has died from a spider bite in OZ since 1980, while one or two people die each year from bee and wasp stings.
Compared to about 200 people killed by lightning (avg. 5-10 per year). Not many of us lose sleep over the thought of being hit by lightning !
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Old Jul 1st 2005, 2:00 pm
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Default Re: An issue causing great stress ... spiders

Originally Posted by Phil-UK
Compared to about 200 people killed by lightning (avg. 5-10 per year). Not many of us lose sleep over the thought of being hit by lightning !
And what about the 4000+ people killed every year on Australian roads? No idea what the injury figures are on top of that. Instead of being scared of spiders, we ought to be scared of going out in the car!

You do get used to spiders, it was also my biggest fear before we moved here (that and snakes). I'm sure we saw spiders just as often in the UK, they just weren't venomous. I have a spider trap to catch spiders and I've never had any problems here, I'm sure they don't run around as fast as the UK ones, which I always left hubby to deal with. The Redbacks are tiny and easy to squash with a shoe.

We had our house treated for spiders and other bugs yesterday, by a pest control company. The treatment was free, because we also had a termite treatment done, otherwise the cost would have been $200. He went around the whole house, inside and out, spraying all the places where spiders are likely to be (up in the corners of the ceilings, cupboards, etc) and sprayed all existing webs, including those in the garage and workshop. I now have lots of dead spiders dropping down everywhere which need sweeping up! But this stuff is supposed to be effective for a year, and if we find creepy crawlies coming in anywhere, I just have to ring the company and they will come out and re-apply if necessary. The pest control company currently have a display on in the Mandurah shopping centre, which you can't help noticing as you walk past, because of the huge spiders on display in the glass cabinets. Thank god we've never seen anything that big. Often the dogs will spot one first and paw it or try eating it, so it's dazed already before I hit it with a shoe!
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