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How Would You Feel

How Would You Feel

Old Aug 22nd 2007, 6:58 am
  #1  
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Default How Would You Feel

If for the last 2 years of your life you had single handedly

Applied for and got visas for everyone
Extended and renovated house to get funds for move and
spent all savings, got lots of debt, foregone your social life, worked 60
hours a week to get money and nearly went bankrupt to achieve this.
Closed down 1 company in preperation for move.
Organised and paid for validation trip.

and now when house has just gone on the market the other half gets cold feet!

Just a thought!!!!!!
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 7:06 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Originally Posted by mickagnew
If for the last 2 years of your life you had single handedly

Applied for and got visas for everyone
Extended and renovated house to get funds for move and
spent all savings, got lots of debt, foregone your social life, worked 60
hours a week to get money and nearly went bankrupt to achieve this.
Closed down 1 company in preperation for move.
Organised and paid for validation trip.

and now when house has just gone on the market the other half gets cold feet!

Just a thought!!!!!!
How cold are your OH's feet? Not sure about wanting to go now or refusing? I think everyone must get last minute panic attacks before such a huge life change. Also, the whole thing up to now has obviously been really stressful for both of you and sometimes it's easy to forget why you started doing this in the first place & difficult to focus on the wonderful positives your new life will bring. Sit down together and look at some gorgeous pics of where you'll be living and try to get back that feeling of excitement you must have both felt when you set out on this journey!
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 7:07 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

probably more like :curse:

can you not still make the validation trip and hope minds change

hope it all works out for you
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 7:16 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

IT'S A STRESSFUL TIME FOR ANY FAMILY WHILST YOUR GOING THROUGH THE MIGRATION PROCESS, WANTING TO GO / NOT TO GO AND THEN CHANGING YOUR MIND BACK AGAIN. A LOT OF FAMILIES WILL PROBABLY GO THROUGH THIS .
AS SAID ABOVE - SIT DOWN AND TALK WITH THE OH AND JUST GO BACK TO WHY YOUR WANTING A NEW LIFE DOWN UNDER!!!!!!
I AM SURE ALL WILL WORK OUT AND YOU WILL ALL BE IN OZ SOON ENOUGH
GOOD LUCK
ANN
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 7:20 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Originally Posted by annkc
IT'S A STRESSFUL TIME FOR ANY FAMILY WHILST YOUR GOING THROUGH THE MIGRATION PROCESS, WANTING TO GO / NOT TO GO AND THEN CHANGING YOUR MIND BACK AGAIN. A LOT OF FAMILIES WILL PROBABLY GO THROUGH THIS .
AS SAID ABOVE - SIT DOWN AND TALK WITH THE OH AND JUST GO BACK TO WHY YOUR WANTING A NEW LIFE DOWN UNDER!!!!!!
I AM SURE ALL WILL WORK OUT AND YOU WILL ALL BE IN OZ SOON ENOUGH
GOOD LUCK
ANN
Ditto
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 7:35 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

sounds perfectly normal to me.... I think we all get cold feet at some point, usually when its very near to happening. Whilst you were so busy there wasn't time to stress... now there is.

Ditto what other posters have said... sit down, have a chat.... communicate... don't ASSume that it's either serious frost bite or not .... listen to your OH.... and don't make any quick decisions...

The whole process takes many months... even years. It takes this amount of time for a reason... to prevent costly mistakes... and remember any decision taken now is probably not irrevocable...

If the worse comes to the worse... get the visa, validate it within the time limits and then kick back and rethink .....

bit above all don't act in haste... becasue you are guaranteed to repent at leisure if you do.
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 7:37 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Wise words guys, thanks very much, maybe Im not appreciating the bigger picture enough

Mick
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 9:15 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Don't mean to sound harsh, but from the way you describe it, you've done all the work & made all the running so far, maybe OH was never really ready for it
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 9:19 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Originally Posted by mickagnew
Wise words guys, thanks very much, maybe Im not appreciating the bigger picture enough

Mick
Oh Mick how hard for the 2 of you.
I do feel its a natural part of the moving process to have these fears and anxieties. I was ready to pull out the day before we completed !
Listen to her, reassure and focus on the reasons why you wanted to do it in the first place - its easy to lose sight of these.








And you can always return - it maybe hard but not impossible

Get clare to contact me if you want.

Gillian
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 9:59 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Hi Mick,

sorry to read this. We are still both excited about our move. BUT, I can also see why someone would be scared and get cold feet.

If you think about it: giving up jobs (and not knowing if you can get ones that pay enough in Oz); giving up your home (and not knowing when and whether you will ever have a "nice" home); being 9,000 miles away from your oldest daughter and other family and friends; worrying about schools, friends etc for the boys .. basically giving up everything that is familiar for an uncertain future .... all of that *is* scary, isn't it?

It is certainly a BIG decision and with all BIG decision it's only human to say to yourself Oh, God, I hope I am making the right decision!

Maybe if you can communicate to Clare that you can understand her fears even if you don't share them? And maybe you can get her to see that it isn't a "once and for all" decision? After all, you can give it a couple of years in Perth and if it turns out not to be for you, it *is* possible to move back to the UK.

Gina
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 10:07 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Hi Mick,

If it was me having cold feet, personally I would still go as we have spent alot of money and time to get to this stage and there would be no way I would back out now without giving it a try. We are not even going for a reccie, we fly the first of October and that is it!

As other people have said, you can always comeback if you absolutely hate it but I would still have to give it at least a year to two years.

My OH keeps asking me if I am getting nervous and I say no as I am really excited to do something different. The kids will love it and that is the main reason we decided to do it in the first place.

I hope all goes well with you in the end.

Sarah
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 10:26 am
  #12  
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Thanks Ladies

Perhaps I need to put my considerate head on and look at it from all aspects, I do now appreciate the magnitude of it all and whether its the right thing to do and expect all you guys that are there or going have all been through it now crunch time is here.

On the rollercoaster now I think, am sure it will work out fine.

Sarah your brave as you`ve not even been there.

Mick
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 10:42 am
  #13  
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Originally Posted by mickagnew
Thanks Ladies

Perhaps I need to put my considerate head on and look at it from all aspects, I do now appreciate the magnitude of it all and whether its the right thing to do and expect all you guys that are there or going have all been through it now crunch time is here.

On the rollercoaster now I think, am sure it will work out fine.

Sarah your brave as you`ve not even been there.

Mick
Hi Mick,

Last minute nerves is to be expected. To be honest we were hoping you guys would bolster us up at the Herts meet as I too am getting very nervy about the move!
I gather from reading the the thread that you are leaving a grown up child here. We too are doing that and this could be why your missus is getting cold feet. Try to reassure her that you will be just a flight away and that you will go back as often as you can for holidays.
It's a big move but it doesn't have to be forever. And if the news about Britains house prices having peaked is anything to go by, then you are selling at the right time.

Keep yer chin up mate and keep talking.

Debs
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 10:54 am
  #14  
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

I think you should prefer that your OH can be open about her feelings and raise concerns now, rather than letting them brew up silently & explode in yer face just as you step off the plane.
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Old Aug 22nd 2007, 10:57 am
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Default Re: How Would You Feel

Cold feet - be worried if you didn't get them at some point or other. It's taken us 6 years and lots to finally get our visa. The minute we got the visa we panicked. This subsided, but then when we booked flights the sleepless nights came back wondering if we're doing the right thing. Even after 6 years of wanting it, now its in our grasp we're having second thoughts.

I hope you/OH are reassured that this happens to everyone and its just a result of the change ahead of you. Stick with it, I'm sure once out there on a validation trip you'll realise exactly why you had this dream in the first place.

Good luck.

KAREN
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