Homesick!
Oct 25th 2005 | 8:17 pm
#31
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 471
From: Perth
Re: Homesick!
Hi TF
Sorry to hear you're feeling so low. There are a bunch of us meet up every Thurs at the Dome at Hillarys (or the tables across from it if its sunny) around 12-12.30ish. Everybody is welcome to come along. Hope you can make it tomorrow or sometime soon.
Yvonne x
Sorry to hear you're feeling so low. There are a bunch of us meet up every Thurs at the Dome at Hillarys (or the tables across from it if its sunny) around 12-12.30ish. Everybody is welcome to come along. Hope you can make it tomorrow or sometime soon.
Yvonne x
Oct 25th 2005 | 8:19 pm
#32
Banned
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 10,138
From: Morayfield - The Posh Part
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by TigerFeet
Ok, i hold my hand up! I am very homesick! 
Anyone else feel the same way? (Ive been in Perth for 4 and 1/2 months)
You know the months (years even) prior to emigration I couldnt wait to come to Australia and start a 'new life'.
I had a holiday about 10 years ago and loved it. But that was a holiday.
The reality is somewhat different.
Yes I wore the 'rosie glassies' (hope thats right expression) and life looked so wonderful.
The reality is....
Yes Australia is beautiful...in fact stunning.
But you cant pop round to your Mums for a brew and a chat. Nor can you call round at your best mates for a chat and a laugh.
I feel very isolated.
The time difference (7 hours in front in Perth, soon to be 8) does make a difference. When its evening here most family and friends are out working or at weekend just out ( I know I always was) Its difficult to syncronize.
Anyhow apologises for feeling so gloomy anyone else feel like this?
TF
Anyone else feel the same way? (Ive been in Perth for 4 and 1/2 months)
You know the months (years even) prior to emigration I couldnt wait to come to Australia and start a 'new life'.
I had a holiday about 10 years ago and loved it. But that was a holiday.
The reality is somewhat different.
Yes I wore the 'rosie glassies' (hope thats right expression) and life looked so wonderful.
The reality is....
Yes Australia is beautiful...in fact stunning.
But you cant pop round to your Mums for a brew and a chat. Nor can you call round at your best mates for a chat and a laugh.
I feel very isolated.
The time difference (7 hours in front in Perth, soon to be 8) does make a difference. When its evening here most family and friends are out working or at weekend just out ( I know I always was) Its difficult to syncronize.
Anyhow apologises for feeling so gloomy anyone else feel like this?
TF
I lost my Mum 30th August 2004, we were still in the Uk. Unfortunately it was a sudden death, and came as a MASSIVE shock to us all... especially as the day it happened, we were out celebrating at TGI fridays, with the kids, that wed finally got our visas...
Anyways, shortly after the funeral, and the wake at my house, i turned to Debs and said lets just ****in do it babe !!!
So we did.. and you know, if im real honest with myself, if NOT for the fact we moved here on the pretence that for once in our lives we were gonna be selfish, then we wouldnt have survived..
I can agree with you on the popping round mates and family bit, but then its like anything in life, to get what you want or get away from soemthing you dont want, there is unfortunately a price to pay...
In all of our cases, which is why BE works so well
at times ... is we can all have a bitch, and a belly ache and get reassurance when needed... but the fact is, at sometime in the past present or future we will all be home sick in one shape or another.. thats LIFEYou have done what you set out to do, stay firm, and if all else fails, be true to yourself, if nothing else, self worth andhonesty will rule the roost.
God Bless Steve
Oct 25th 2005 | 8:36 pm
#33
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 3,155
From: in a place near the river and the sea where the sun always shines
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by Timber Floor Au
I sincerely symapthise with you.... to give you some background...
I lost my Mum 30th August 2004, we were still in the Uk. Unfortunately it was a sudden death, and came as a MASSIVE shock to us all... especially as the day it happened, we were out celebrating at TGI fridays, with the kids, that wed finally got our visas...
Anyways, shortly after the funeral, and the wake at my house, i turned to Debs and said lets just ****in do it babe !!!
So we did.. and you know, if im real honest with myself, if NOT for the fact we moved here on the pretence that for once in our lives we were gonna be selfish, then we wouldnt have survived..
I can agree with you on the popping round mates and family bit, but then its like anything in life, to get what you want or get away from soemthing you dont want, there is unfortunately a price to pay...
In all of our cases, which is why BE works so well at times ... is we can all have a bitch, and a belly ache and get reassurance when needed... but the fact is, at sometime in the past present or future we will all be home sick in one shape or another.. thats LIFE
You have done what you set out to do, stay firm, and if all else fails, be true to yourself, if nothing else, self worth andhonesty will rule the roost.
God Bless Steve
I lost my Mum 30th August 2004, we were still in the Uk. Unfortunately it was a sudden death, and came as a MASSIVE shock to us all... especially as the day it happened, we were out celebrating at TGI fridays, with the kids, that wed finally got our visas...
Anyways, shortly after the funeral, and the wake at my house, i turned to Debs and said lets just ****in do it babe !!!
So we did.. and you know, if im real honest with myself, if NOT for the fact we moved here on the pretence that for once in our lives we were gonna be selfish, then we wouldnt have survived..
I can agree with you on the popping round mates and family bit, but then its like anything in life, to get what you want or get away from soemthing you dont want, there is unfortunately a price to pay...
In all of our cases, which is why BE works so well
at times ... is we can all have a bitch, and a belly ache and get reassurance when needed... but the fact is, at sometime in the past present or future we will all be home sick in one shape or another.. thats LIFEYou have done what you set out to do, stay firm, and if all else fails, be true to yourself, if nothing else, self worth andhonesty will rule the roost.
God Bless Steve
excellent post steve, glad its working out for you
Oct 25th 2005 | 8:56 pm
#34
Banned
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 10,138
From: Morayfield - The Posh Part
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by debbiemc
excellent post steve, glad its working out for you
Oct 25th 2005 | 9:20 pm
#35
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 17,426
From: Mount Tamborine
Re: Homesick!
Just wanted to send you a hug too Tigerfeet - at least you know that there's other people in the same boat and that it usually does get easier. I can understand it must be really hard for you feeling homesick but as I'm still here I can't offer you a cuppa but I'm on t'internet a lot so just msn me if you feeling lonely and fancy a chat. Nice to see you've been given loads of encouragement on this thread
Good luck with those jobs you've applied for.
Kath x
Good luck with those jobs you've applied for.
Kath x
Oct 25th 2005 | 10:28 pm
#36
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 523
From: In our own house! Northern beaches
Re: Homesick!
I think it takes a long time to get settled somewhere. I have been in Sydney for almost 10 months now and I still feel homesick but it is better than 6 months ago!
A big help to me was meeting some people off this place BE...some of those guys have become such good friends and are there for me which is just what I needed.
Too, people back home do move on, my best friend is now moving to Malayasia so she defo will be moving on...
The best advice I can give is to take each day as it comes, don't think of where you are staying as being there forever, it isn't...it maybe but not right now, just chill....give yourself about 2 years...a long time I know but not that long...
A big help to me was meeting some people off this place BE...some of those guys have become such good friends and are there for me which is just what I needed.
Too, people back home do move on, my best friend is now moving to Malayasia so she defo will be moving on...
The best advice I can give is to take each day as it comes, don't think of where you are staying as being there forever, it isn't...it maybe but not right now, just chill....give yourself about 2 years...a long time I know but not that long...
Oct 25th 2005 | 10:30 pm
#37
Banned
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 10,138
From: Morayfield - The Posh Part
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by hedgehog-girl
I think it takes a long time to get settled somewhere. I have been in Sydney for almost 10 months now and I still feel homesick but it is better than 6 months ago!
A big help to me was meeting some people off this place BE...some of those guys have become such good friends and are there for me which is just what I needed.
Too, people back home do move on, my best friend is now moving to Malayasia so she defo will be moving on...
The best advice I can give is to take each day as it comes, don't think of where you are staying as being there forever, it isn't...it maybe but not right now, just chill....give yourself about 2 years...a long time I know but not that long...
A big help to me was meeting some people off this place BE...some of those guys have become such good friends and are there for me which is just what I needed.
Too, people back home do move on, my best friend is now moving to Malayasia so she defo will be moving on...
The best advice I can give is to take each day as it comes, don't think of where you are staying as being there forever, it isn't...it maybe but not right now, just chill....give yourself about 2 years...a long time I know but not that long...
Oct 26th 2005 | 12:05 am
#38
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 442
From: Near Bond Street, London W1
Re: Homesick!
You may find some of my observations under "Is it homesickness" in "The returning to the UK" forum chime with yours. I have been keeping a bit of a diary of my thoughts during the couple of weeks I returned to the UK. I was hoping it would cure my homesickness and that after an October in the UK I would be rushing to get back to the sun. Alas not so.
Originally Posted by TigerFeet
Ok, i hold my hand up! I am very homesick!
Anyone else feel the same way? (Ive been in Perth for 4 and 1/2 months)
You know the months (years even) prior to emigration I couldnt wait to come to Australia and start a 'new life'.
I had a holiday about 10 years ago and loved it. But that was a holiday.
The reality is somewhat different.
Yes I wore the 'rosie glassies' (hope thats right expression) and life looked so wonderful.
The reality is....
I have been keeping a bit of a diary going under "Is it homesickness" in the Returning to the UK pages. You might be interested in my observations which may coincide with some of yours. Ian 12
Yes Australia is beautiful...in fact stunning.
But you cant pop round to your Mums for a brew and a chat. Nor can you call round at your best mates for a chat and a laugh.
I feel very isolated.
The time difference (7 hours in front in Perth, soon to be 8) does make a difference. When its evening here most family and friends are out working or at weekend just out ( I know I always was) Its difficult to syncronize.
Anyhow apologises for feeling so gloomy anyone else feel like this?
TF
Anyone else feel the same way? (Ive been in Perth for 4 and 1/2 months)
You know the months (years even) prior to emigration I couldnt wait to come to Australia and start a 'new life'.
I had a holiday about 10 years ago and loved it. But that was a holiday.
The reality is somewhat different.
Yes I wore the 'rosie glassies' (hope thats right expression) and life looked so wonderful.
The reality is....
I have been keeping a bit of a diary going under "Is it homesickness" in the Returning to the UK pages. You might be interested in my observations which may coincide with some of yours. Ian 12
Yes Australia is beautiful...in fact stunning.
But you cant pop round to your Mums for a brew and a chat. Nor can you call round at your best mates for a chat and a laugh.
I feel very isolated.
The time difference (7 hours in front in Perth, soon to be 8) does make a difference. When its evening here most family and friends are out working or at weekend just out ( I know I always was) Its difficult to syncronize.
Anyhow apologises for feeling so gloomy anyone else feel like this?
TF
Oct 26th 2005 | 6:00 am
#39
Forum Regular
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 124
From: Birmingham uk
Re: Homesick!
Tf, you may miss family but friends are where you make them. Go out of your way to chat to others, evenings out and coffee will follow. Your lucky to have been given the oppertunity to try a new life in Australia. So try not to be down and look ahead with positive thinking......hope it all works out
kerry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
kerry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Oct 28th 2005 | 6:39 am
#40
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 788
From: was Bradford then poole dorset then Sydney,Forster, Kanwal,Gosford,and now Erina
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by kerryinuk
Tf, you may miss family but friends are where you make them. Go out of your way to chat to others, evenings out and coffee will follow. Your lucky to have been given the oppertunity to try a new life in Australia. So try not to be down and look ahead with positive thinking......hope it all works out
kerry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
kerry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Oct 28th 2005 | 8:39 am
#41
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 3,215
From: Limerick-Shropshire- Perth.
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by Dee & Steve
My remedy for homesickness is to go home on a holiday. Seriously, we went home less than 12 months of us being here and it was the best thing ever. We had a fantastic time, still very fresh in my head ( we were home in may/June) and it didn't seem so emotional since we had only left home the previous august. We were missing the usual, family, friends, your local, (I'm Irish what can I say, our local is up there with family and friends), but when we got home the things we were missing so much, were not such a big deal after all. My point being, that I feel if we waited longer than this to go home we would have built up all the things we were missing. We had agreed to go home within our first year and therefore had budgeted for it, and I would love to go home at Christmas or even next year but I know that will not be financially feasible. If we had qualified for the world cup my husband would have miraculously found the money to go home but lets not go there. I hope you feel better soon, it doesn't last forever, but it does take some time to re-adjust, I think we forget sometimes what a massive move we have all undertaken, we have up rooted our lives, from everything that is familiar and trekked to another continent as well as the other side of the world. And while we have all done it with the best intentions, that doesn't mean that it isn't be tough at times. Thankfully I haven't experienced too much homesickness, mind you I did cry my eyes out on Christmas eve and new years when all my family rang me, ( and my sister thought it was a good idea to play Mary Black down the phone) but thats to be expected.
Personally, I love it here and thankfully all has gone really well so far, we have bought our own home and I am about to open my own business, ( I am a beauty therapist), all in 14 months of being here. But I do hope you feel better soon, and I must say, while I don't post threads often, I do log on regularly, and reading everyone else's posts can really help make you feel better if you are having a down day.Take Care. PS didnt mean for this post to be so long..... Deirdre
Personally, I love it here and thankfully all has gone really well so far, we have bought our own home and I am about to open my own business, ( I am a beauty therapist), all in 14 months of being here. But I do hope you feel better soon, and I must say, while I don't post threads often, I do log on regularly, and reading everyone else's posts can really help make you feel better if you are having a down day.Take Care. PS didnt mean for this post to be so long..... Deirdre
Oct 28th 2005 | 9:02 am
#42
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 4,922
From: Asia Pacific
Re: Homesick!
I think the posts on this thread are great and supportive. I've always felt that the term homesickness is a little bit misleading. Australia is now my home come good or bad and I dont regard the UK as being "home".
Its interesting but I was speaking to someone here from the UK who used the comment "back home..." when speaking about England. I sort of wince a little - not because of the term but perhaps this is the way they regard the UK for themselves. For that reason will they always be away from home in Australia I wonder? Will they be "abroad" in their own mind?
Sure the terms generic and just a saying perhaps but I do think that a little shift in attitude or perception goes a long way. Here in Australia I have a lack of familiarity and family around me but thats part of the adventure and journey I think, rather than being daunted or feel disjointed about it I try to be excited.
I know the reasons that left the UK are still there. My friends there will move on. I also know that the time I spend with my family in the future will be all the more precious. Things are different now for me and Michelle, certainly not easier, just different. We're making friends where we can and making our home in Australia. After all home is where the heart is they say.
My best wishes to all those who feel lost and I hope you find what you are looking for. Just dont look too hard since you might not notice that the thing was here all along and the more time spent looking is less time living!
Its interesting but I was speaking to someone here from the UK who used the comment "back home..." when speaking about England. I sort of wince a little - not because of the term but perhaps this is the way they regard the UK for themselves. For that reason will they always be away from home in Australia I wonder? Will they be "abroad" in their own mind?
Sure the terms generic and just a saying perhaps but I do think that a little shift in attitude or perception goes a long way. Here in Australia I have a lack of familiarity and family around me but thats part of the adventure and journey I think, rather than being daunted or feel disjointed about it I try to be excited.
I know the reasons that left the UK are still there. My friends there will move on. I also know that the time I spend with my family in the future will be all the more precious. Things are different now for me and Michelle, certainly not easier, just different. We're making friends where we can and making our home in Australia. After all home is where the heart is they say.
My best wishes to all those who feel lost and I hope you find what you are looking for. Just dont look too hard since you might not notice that the thing was here all along and the more time spent looking is less time living!
Oct 28th 2005 | 11:03 am
#43
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 629
Re: Homesick!
Homesickness needs to be understood as grief - it is grieving a loss. And it is very, very hard. But it is in some ways it is more complicated because what you are grieving is not dead -you could have it back. This brings anxiety about possible options. I felt homesickness more than I can possibly describe for several months, then it reduced sharply after about 5-6 months. Funnily enough this is often about the time that the migrant's life becomes fairly 'routine' again, which is a bugger because for some of us that means we got no 'honeymoon' period in Australia!
The 'hole' is always there, still now for me after over 2 years, but it is not the same as homesickness. People who have been here 10, 20 years plus say the same. It's something you learn to live with. But I often feel that some old relationships need to change fundamentally, or else it can be too much, for some.
The 'hole' is always there, still now for me after over 2 years, but it is not the same as homesickness. People who have been here 10, 20 years plus say the same. It's something you learn to live with. But I often feel that some old relationships need to change fundamentally, or else it can be too much, for some.
Oct 28th 2005 | 4:27 pm
#44
Banned
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 81
Re: Homesick!
Originally Posted by ShozInOz
Homesickness needs to be understood as grief - it is grieving a loss. And it is very, very hard. But it is in some ways it is more complicated because what you are grieving is not dead -you could have it back. This brings anxiety about possible options. I felt homesickness more than I can possibly describe for several months, then it reduced sharply after about 5-6 months. Funnily enough this is often about the time that the migrant's life becomes fairly 'routine' again, which is a bugger because for some of us that means we got no 'honeymoon' period in Australia!
The 'hole' is always there, still now for me after over 2 years, but it is not the same as homesickness. People who have been here 10, 20 years plus say the same. It's something you learn to live with. But I often feel that some old relationships need to change fundamentally, or else it can be too much, for some.
The 'hole' is always there, still now for me after over 2 years, but it is not the same as homesickness. People who have been here 10, 20 years plus say the same. It's something you learn to live with. But I often feel that some old relationships need to change fundamentally, or else it can be too much, for some.
Fortunately my dad has been over and a couple of my brothers at various times plus I went back 3 years ago and going again this Christmas so "personal' contact has been made but also I've missed out on family events like the big 0 birthdays and some sad events.....they'll never come back now, gone in time.
One thing that shouldn't be used as a sway to mould peoples' decisions is the use of such things like that poor girl being slashed on the face. England isn't the only country where such despicable acts take place...one example here not long ago....a mother leaves 4 kids under 12 yrs alone to go out , get drunk watching a pub broadcast of some boxing match and the kids burn to death. Plenty of such like stories here...no place is better than the other in that respect.
Oct 30th 2005 | 3:45 am
#45
Thread Starter
Meow!
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 159
From: Perth W.A.
Re: Homesick!
Hello..
....and thankyou for your replies, hugs, karma and pms, I have read through all of them and bless you all for your support.
I thought it was just me and I was just being stupid for feeling this way. It is so very difficult trying to settle in and coping with being homesick when at the same time I can appreciate how lovely it is here.
I do feel that 'hole' and it is a horrible feeling.
Also it is very difficult not to refer to the UK as not being 'home'.....
Try it, its hard. I have to stop myself when Im talking to someone and say 'Yeah, yeah, blah, blah and you know back hom.... oh, I mean in England, blah blah...'
Its a difficult one. I grimace when I cant refer to it as 'home'.
I guess if there is one thing I have learnt its that there is no greater bond than family.
Thankyou again to each and everyone for your support, bless you,
TF
....and thankyou for your replies, hugs, karma and pms, I have read through all of them and bless you all for your support.
I thought it was just me and I was just being stupid for feeling this way. It is so very difficult trying to settle in and coping with being homesick when at the same time I can appreciate how lovely it is here.
I do feel that 'hole' and it is a horrible feeling.
Also it is very difficult not to refer to the UK as not being 'home'.....
Try it, its hard. I have to stop myself when Im talking to someone and say 'Yeah, yeah, blah, blah and you know back hom.... oh, I mean in England, blah blah...'
Its a difficult one. I grimace when I cant refer to it as 'home'.
I guess if there is one thing I have learnt its that there is no greater bond than family.
Thankyou again to each and everyone for your support, bless you,
TF
