Centurion

Perhaps home is where the heart is but I see lots of posts with people saying "if it doesn't work out then you/we can come home", or "I'm homesick" or use the term "back home" when in Australia.

This intrigues me since when I moved here we sold our home in the UK and now its very firmly here. Our mindset and I think that which enabled us to emigrate with success is that Australia is now our home. We may use the term "back in the UK" but dont refer to that as home.

I'm sure its different for many people but I dont see how you can make a real go of anything if you arrive with the intention of "going home if it doesn't work out" for example. Is this form of emigration a trial extended holiday then ?

For me the commitment was absolute. It had to be since there will be difficult times in life in Australia too. Thats the way the world is. If I felt I could run to the familiarity and kept all my options open would I ever truly settle.

I'd be interested in other peoples thoughts on this as its just something that I tend to notice on some posts from time to time and I've always wondered.

jacknat

for me personaly i will be going to make a new home....i will always feel a fondness for england though.

i suppose different people will undoubtebly feel different.....it would be a sad world if we were all the same!!!

mand8002

I struggle with the word 'home' sometimes, as although I now think of Australia as home, I still have my house in England, and refer to that as home. It is exactly as I left it and that is where my husband lives whilst he is working in the UK. I tend to not refer to UK as home, it is always the UK.

As for homesickness, I think people call it homesickness when in fact it is more people sickness, as it is generally family and friends that they miss and not the physical place.

There are many people who emigrate without ever visiting Australia first, and maybe it is them that think more about returning if they don't settle, just as people move to ther parts of UK for work and don't settle.

People have different personalities and I am very much a half cup full sort of person, and accept all Australia has to offer. There is no point moving half way round the world to still want the same life I had in the UK, if I had wanted that I would have stayed there.

ElshaUK

I think of England as 'A' Home but Australia is 'My' home. I am very homesick for Australia

I thought I 'missed' England but truthfully, I never even knew what it was like to live here. I left England when I was 8 and came back when I was 24 (6 years ago) The thought of staying here forever, frightens me so that I cannot even draw breath.

I could cry like a baby, I miss my family & friends in OZ so much. However, until I can afford to go (need to pay off some of the debt first) I just have to live with it. England is not bad, it is just my emotions. There WILL be things I miss about it, just as there are things I miss about OZ.

But in answer to your question about home being where the heart is....absolutely! My body/brain etc are in England....but my heart flew back to Australia years ago....

I am sitting down at the weekend with my other half and working out a budget, I have told him that I want to fly back to Australia next Dec (2006) for good, so we had better hurry up and be in a position to be able to go!



Susan

KatieStar

I have been here in OZ 7 months and do not feel like it is home. For me my home is still N.Ireland. That is not a decision I have made but the way I feel. My hubby told me this am that he has arranged temp work in Belfast so we can go back next year for a holiday and see how we feel then. I am so excited. I can't wait. I am looking forward to showing off my new baby to the rellies and taking our dog for a walk in one of the beautiful forest parks in N.Ireland and most importantly visiting my first baby's grave

I intended to make Aussie my home before I left to come, but I don't think you can know until you get here exactly how you will feel and what you will miss. Australia may well become my home in the future, but for me being in a place 7 months is too short a time for it to be home.

A very excited Katie

scissors

Home is where the heart is thats definately true,i think my heart left the Uk long before i did i wasnt happy with my life there,otherwise i would never have come here,and im not really sure i understand why people do it if they are happy with their life in the Uk,maybe thats why it doesnt always work,who nows.
For me it was all work and no play in the uk,we had nice holidays, that i never wanted to go home from,but they were only once a year,did we really work hard for 50 weeks of the year for 2 wks holiday sounds bizarre now doesnt it?We didnt have a particularly close family, so i guess that made it easier,the last 10 years have really changed the city that i lived in,as with alot of other cities across the uk we never felt safe going out at night,what kind of place will it be in another 10 or 20 years rime :scared:
Before my husband sugested we might emmigrate to australia,it hadnt been somewhere i had ever thought about going even for a holiday certainly not somewhere id ever craved to go,i thought of australia as being a very brown and baron place oh how i was wrong.To start with i thought he was off his rocker,lol,and i thought it was way to far,but i guess i started taking more notice of programmes on the tv that were based in australia and we wen to an emmigration exhibition to see if we could get in,but i still wasnt convinced,lol.
I decided that if we were going to stand a chance the other side of the world i would have to have some friends otherwise i couldnt do it,i had learned about BE from someone we d been in touch with from the exhibition butid never used a computer before in my life,i had never had any interest in one at all,but i thought id best learn cos i wanted to make friends,so i got hubby to show me what to do,he did and i joined BE and put my first post up introducing ourselves,then panicked like hell cos i d got so manyreplies and i didnt know how to answer them,lol,oh how things have changed,lol.I never looked back from there,i got all the info i needed about the country,found out it wasnt all outback,,lol,and made loades of fantastic friends along the way,we all helped each other through the process and now that alot of us are here we still help each other through the ups and downs to,which is more than i ever got from my family in the uk.
So i think i started to think of australia as my home even before we got here,even though id never visited it before,it didnt matter cos my new family of friends were going to be there to.
Now that i am here,its far better than id ever imagined,yes things are different but thats not to say they are worse or better just different,if people just embrace the differences and accept then then they ll get on just fine.
Before we arrived i told eveyone that we d give it 2 years get our citizenship then go back for a holiday and decide whether we wanted to stay here or not,this was said mainly to appese my daughte r who got cold feet half way through the process,she accepted that thinking it wouldnt be forever,but now im thinking do i even want to go back for a holiday,i know its early day yet for us but at the momment i can think of plenty of places id rather go for a holiday than the uk,and my daughter is mentioning it less an d less to.I hardly ever think about the uk and definately no longerthink of it as home,and i think once we move into our own property i ll be well and truly here for good my heart is definately not in england.

tracey

KatieStar

Hi Tracey

I thought I would explain my story in case you wanted to know

We applied for our visa after going on holiday to Australia. We had both been before and the trip confirmed how much we liked it here. Part way through the visa application I became pregnant with our first baby, Harry. I had a few early scares and was glad of the support of Tim's family. The way I felt about N.Ireland changed. Must have been the hormones LOL. I had thought it was a beautiful country, but being from England (I moved over when I married Tim) it was not home. I came to think of it as that though.

However our first baby died suddenly. He was stillborn at 39 weeks. My heart felt broke and it became very hard to see Tim's brothers and sister happy with their children. I wanted a new start and to get to Australia to make a fresh start for us. Not long after we booked the plane tickets I found I was pregnant again and the reservations I had about leaving came back again. I felt like I was leaving our home, the place I felt we belonged.

I tried to put it to the back of my mind though and was excited about the adventure of it. 7 months here and I still feel N. Ireland is my home and I am looking forward to our holiday we have planned for next year. I am hoping it will clarify my feelings and let us both know we want to live.

I hope my long spiel is of interest to somebody
Katie

scissors

hi katie
good to hear your in a better frmae of mind today,maybe the holiday will do you good,and maybe,and please dont take offense when i say this cos i really dont mean any by it,but maybe your still mourning for you lost baby,it must be realy hard,no one would no unless theyve been through it themselves,maybe you came out here to soon after losing it,or maybe you feel you still want to be close.What ever the reasone im glad youve got your holiday to look forward to and whatever your decision whether to stay or go back to ireland,no one can help you make that decision,its hard when you have a new baby to,they take up so much of your time,and sometimes you need that family support,if your lucky enough to have that support then maybe it would be hard to leave that behind
good luck hunny,i ll pm you my number and we ll get together like we said

KatieStar

Hi Tracey

Please don't think I have been offended by anything you have said, because I haven't. I thought I would explain though, but it wasn't because I felt defensive or offended. I just wanted to explain if that makes sense.

I do feel in better form today. Going out yesterday with the mother and baby group really helped as has planning different things to keep me busy. Also HCF have sent me a cheque for the money they owe me. Tim telling me that we could go home for a holiday was the icing on the cake though.

Please do pm me your number.

Katie

Pollyana

Very very odd feelings - been here two years, tried everything to make it feel like home. Flew back to the UK three weeks ago, and landing at Heathrow I knew. I was home.
Coming back here to Aus though - feels strange, unfamiliar, not at all how home should feel, and not how I want to feel at all.

jad n rich

Its home within the home, if you get that the kids, dogs, general life because no matter what people are hoping australia is, day to day stuff is exactly the same.

Outside tho its not home I still find it odd, like yesterday saw a 12 year old shopping in PJ's thats odd its odd its light so early and people get up at times we would never have seen before even tho we do that too now, still feels like its something from a different planet. People still class you as POM or ask why you came here so your reminded its not home anyway.