jacknscoob

Hey Everyone

We are emigrating on Jan 18th - I really cant wait!! Tickets booked, its all go!

The only difficulty is me coping with leaving my Mum here in UK (she is with my Dad). She is really upset that we are moving and I feel very guilty about going. Every time I see or speak to her I get upset.

It is a dream come true for us going to the Sunshine Coast and the only reason I would not go is because of her. I know that I am doing the right thing for me but I am still emotional about it all.

Ms Spinkway (age 36)

herrchook

Don't start me - I feel exactly the same. I know my parents are heartbroken and I'm just dreading the goodbyes. Maybe we'll just disappear one night. My in laws are a problem too and as they're in their 70s they know they might not get out to see us very often. If it gets really bad, we're considering bringing them with us (for a holiday) when we first go. When my other half first suggested it I almost cracked, but now I see it's actually a not bad idea. We've got 2 little girls and if the in laws came with us, they could help look after the girls while we house/job hunt. Another thought we've got is to perhaps travel via LA and take my parents with us for that stretch only. We could then spend a week or so with them on holiday and when they go home, we fly on to Oz.

Just a few of the ways we're trying to help alleviate the guilt, and make it easier for those staying behind.

Good luck with it.

Tableland

You have to do what is best for you. Your mother must understand why you are making this decision to change your life for the better. Maybe one day she could retire there and join you? My advice is that if you get to Australia and feel homesick for everyone back home - just go back on a holiday and then when you have returned to Australia make your mind up about going or staying.

In the meantime think of yourself and the good times ahead. Your family will understand.

regards
T.

jacknscoob

Thanks for that...It is nice to hear that others are in the same boat.

I think she does understand why we are going. I just think that it was the last thing that she thought I would do...move half way round the world. She thought that she would be the grandma living around the corner.

I am so committed and looking forward to going, its a shame that it is a factor. I'd like to take her, but that would not be possible.

Life goes on and on a positive note, she can use her computer and the webcam technology is really good!

Ms Spinkway

mindblower

Of course the hardest part is leaving family and friends. But you rarely get a once in a liftime opportunity to better yourselves like this, once time passes there should be greater acceptance.

island.girl

i feel the same but hey life is for living and your mum should be proud of you!! mine is!

davykaz

well where do you start
1) this is your life
2) thay can always visit
3) U can visit them
4)F%$# It its your life your decision

Sorry dont get me wrong Im going to miss my mum & dad & friends etc etc etc but you have to make the decision that suits you not anyone else. I do feel bad if that sounds rather nasty but its the way i feel about it

Hutch

Ultimately, they're always only a day away

Siren & Brian

What about poor ole Dad?

alwilco

I think we've all been through that, I still do and I've lived in oz for about 7 years now.
However once one gets into the life and routine in OZ it all gets easier. As somebody else said "it's your life", and you'll have a great one in OZ.
Good luck living on the coast, we started out living there then moved to Brisbane, still go there most weekends - it's sensational.
Give us a hoy when you get here and we'll have a coldie!
Best of luck, Alex.

ozzieeagle

I didn't have to much of a problem leaving my parents, for and with my then new aussie wife way back in 1980. I've seen them on average once every 4 years since then, and they are both going strong.

However.... My Aussie Born Daughter (the 2nd oldest 20 year old) Has decided with much backing from us, to go the other way, as her white collar office work background is far more rewarding in all aspects, in the UK, than here.

She only departed last week, we dont know when she will be back, as she has gone on a one way ticket. It was far far tougher than I ever expected it to be. The solution I've had to come up with, and I only decided on this after she left. Is we will definitely shout her a return ticket, IE: from and back to England, each year. circa 1700 Aud, Not much price to pay really, and this way she gets to see her 2 younger siblings without quantam changes in their appearance and personalities.

So maybe budgeting to bring your parents over regularly, could be in the equation, It's cheap enough once they are here.

mand8002

You are lucky to have such an understanding mum. Mine gave me such grief about our move, but I would not let is stop me from following my dream. You only get one stab at life and have to live it for you and not your parents. My mum is quite controlling and wants her children to live their life how she wants them to, but it is not her life.
It is extremely hard leaving family and friends but I would always hope that if my children wanted to embark on such an adventure, then I would be proud of them. At this moment I have one daughter living and working in France and one in the UK and then two more here with me. We are a strong family unit and maybe this is why it is working for us.

majortom

I have wanted to go to Australia and join my family in Adelaide for years, and now that time could be coming soon as my wife has been sponsored by a company under the RSMS visa.

My dream has always been that we would go as a family (wife and 4 children), but my to eldest girls (22 and 20) have told us they don't want to come. They have boyfriends and a good circle of friends, and are happy here in Kent.

The thought of splitting up the family has been hard to take, our youngest daughter is only 3 and is adored by my elder girls...........but my wife and I aren't getting younger (48 and 44) and this would be the last "throw of the dice" for us.

Throughout all of our short life spans an opportunity for an adventure may only appear once.........and we have decided that we have our lives and our children will live theirs.
We hope that one day they will join us......but that day will be for them to decide.

Go with your dreams.......and good luck to you all

sunnycoast

We are /have been in the same situation, but once the parents have been out on holiday here, they start to understand a little why we are here. Though its upsetting initially they do get used to it - and in an emergency, it took me 24hrs to get back to southamton last year. You can always get yourself a webcam the folks love it!

cranni

Sorry i dont mean to sound harsh, but you have to think about your family, you may never get another chance to do this, and when they are gone, you will truly regret it.
My mum never got upset about it , not in front of us, and never made us feel guilty, they encouraged us all the way, said it was a better life for our family and they would not always be here.
They have been here on hols, and cant wait to come back. They have also got the webcam and they have never used a computor in their life, this has opened a whole new life for them.
I left 3 older kids which was very hard for me, we brought 3 with us, my daughter came in June and1 of my sons comes at xmas on student visa. my oldest said he will come over to live in a couple of years, and will enjoy his hols until then,
I personally think it is selfish of parents to make you feel like this, when you just want what is best for your kids, and they should want what is best for you and put on a brave face, you have enough to deal with , with the whole process of emigrating, have a great life and stop feeling guilty. Denise