friends on holiday what do you say?
Mar 24th 2005, 2:56 am
#46
Drunken Aussie
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Brisvegas
Posts: 1,080
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
fair point. just but just tell them that as you don't know them that if things don't work out after they arrive that they will have to find alternative acommodation. you never know, they may turn out to be a whole heap of fun, and you'd wished they'd stayed for longer. everyone is taking a negative view. if you have the room, just let them stay. if it doesn't work out, kick them out, it is after all your home.
as i was saying, if one of my friends in the uk told me their girlfriends cousin who i didn't know was coming to oz, i'd only wish i had somewhere for them to stay, so i could show them some hospitality.
as i was saying, if one of my friends in the uk told me their girlfriends cousin who i didn't know was coming to oz, i'd only wish i had somewhere for them to stay, so i could show them some hospitality.
Originally Posted by Ceri
It is the people their friends are bringing - they don't know them. These friends sound if they are taking liberties. The person has tried to put them off bringing the other two, but the friends don't seem to be listening and are intent on brining Tom Dick and Harry, free accommodation. That's the way I see it anyway.
I was always taught not to take liberties - don't invite yourself unless you are invited, say thank you when someone tries to help you . You have said you were invited "at their insistance", these two friends of friends don't sound as if they were invited like you were. It seems they are taking liberties
Totally bad manners.
Seems there is quite a lot of it about these days.
I was always taught not to take liberties - don't invite yourself unless you are invited, say thank you when someone tries to help you . You have said you were invited "at their insistance", these two friends of friends don't sound as if they were invited like you were. It seems they are taking liberties
Totally bad manners.
Seems there is quite a lot of it about these days.
Mar 24th 2005, 3:00 am
#47
part-time Visa Angel!
Joined: Oct 2003
Location: half marathon runner!
Posts: 4,458
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
Originally Posted by brisnick
as i was saying, if one of my friends in the uk told me their girlfriends cousin who i didn't know was coming to oz, i'd only wish i had somewhere for them to stay, so i could show them some hospitality.
I agree entirely, on the basis you were told that they were coming first, giving you opportunity to offer, as "the second cousin of the girl you had just split up with" did. Sounds to me though like this other couple have been invited along, without checking that it would be okay beforehand, just seems that basic manners have been left out of it, rather than (perhaps) the staying over itself being such an issue
Mar 24th 2005, 3:06 am
#48
Drunken Aussie
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Brisvegas
Posts: 1,080
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
yes, it is bad manners to assume it's ok to bring some uninvited guest to stay. but the uninvited guest may have been told it's fine by the friends. they are possibly innocent in all this.
let them stay, but tell your friends you don't appreciate them inviting other people to stay, and if they do it again then they aren't welcome either. i don't know how i'd feel until it actually happened, i guess i'd let my friends know it was wrong to assume it was ok, make them feel super guilty, but let everyone stay anyway. obviously, if there's no room (and having to stay in a tent in the yard equates to no room in my book) then just say "sorry, no room".
let them stay, but tell your friends you don't appreciate them inviting other people to stay, and if they do it again then they aren't welcome either. i don't know how i'd feel until it actually happened, i guess i'd let my friends know it was wrong to assume it was ok, make them feel super guilty, but let everyone stay anyway. obviously, if there's no room (and having to stay in a tent in the yard equates to no room in my book) then just say "sorry, no room".
Originally Posted by mlbonner
I agree entirely, on the basis you were told that they were coming first, giving you opportunity to offer, as "the second cousin of the girl you had just split up with" did. Sounds to me though like this other couple have been invited along, without checking that it would be okay beforehand, just seems that basic manners have been left out of it, rather than (perhaps) the staying over itself being such an issue
Mar 24th 2005, 3:09 am
#49
part-time Visa Angel!
Joined: Oct 2003
Location: half marathon runner!
Posts: 4,458
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
Originally Posted by brisnick
yes, it is bad manners to assume it's ok to bring some uninvited guest to stay. but the uninvited guest may have been told it's fine by the friends. they are possibly innocent in all this.
Mar 24th 2005, 3:16 am
#50
Y Ddraig Goch
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Body is in Brissie. Heart and soul has long flown home.
Posts: 3,722
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
This is like Dear agony aunt 
To the original poster, tell us what happens .
I say tell them to B8gger off. Just be truthful - you don't have the room for 4 people. They can take it or leave it - you offered to find the other two accomodation, going out of your way to be helpful - I think they are taking liberties.
Her friends don't seem to be listening, she has been polite etc etc to them what more can she say - except NO
cheers
P.s The original message by Jenny
"My problem being we don't have space for 4 adults and I have offered to find furnished accomodation for them all but they have suggested a tent in the garden! What the hell can I do?They want to book flights very soon and I have this awful feeling they will arriving sleeping bags in hand wanting a free holiday accomodation no matter what.
To the original poster, tell us what happens .
I say tell them to B8gger off. Just be truthful - you don't have the room for 4 people. They can take it or leave it - you offered to find the other two accomodation, going out of your way to be helpful - I think they are taking liberties.
Her friends don't seem to be listening, she has been polite etc etc to them what more can she say - except NO
cheers
P.s The original message by Jenny
"My problem being we don't have space for 4 adults and I have offered to find furnished accomodation for them all but they have suggested a tent in the garden! What the hell can I do?They want to book flights very soon and I have this awful feeling they will arriving sleeping bags in hand wanting a free holiday accomodation no matter what.
Last edited by Ceri; Mar 24th 2005 at 3:40 am.
Mar 24th 2005, 5:54 am
#51
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 79
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
We lived in the Caribbean for several years and had all sorts of family and friends expect free accommodation. Family tend to be the worst as they feel they are doing YOU a favour by coming all this way to visit you. But we found that lesser acquaintances were just so grateful for the free accommodation, that they really tried not to impose.
A friend said she always has 3 rules for overseas visitors:
1. They must always eat lunch out (saves on the food bill, and she didn't have to spend all day in kitchen).
2. They must hire a car (so she did not have to play at being a taxi).
3. If they wanted alcohol - they brought their own.
Pretty sensible to me...
Good luck
Trax
A friend said she always has 3 rules for overseas visitors:
1. They must always eat lunch out (saves on the food bill, and she didn't have to spend all day in kitchen).
2. They must hire a car (so she did not have to play at being a taxi).
3. If they wanted alcohol - they brought their own.
Pretty sensible to me...
Good luck
Trax
Mar 24th 2005, 6:34 am
#52
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2005
Location: Perth W.A
Posts: 429
Re: friends on holiday what do you say?
Sorry to say it, but its your house your rule's,you guys have done all the hard work to get out there....were they that keen to come and see you in the UK?...i dont think so when we went out to Oz last year our mate put us up for the night and then we moved on...we knew they were not on holiday like us
