Feel like we want to go home
Feb 27th 2006, 10:12 pm
#31
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Location: Brisbane
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by renth
Right, this is what you must do. Get them out of the Catholic schools and send them to the local one, if the local one's no good find a good local one and move near it.
We made a similar mistake last year taking our kids out of the local school and sending them to a private one in the city - BIG MISTAKE, which we realised after 3 semesters.
We made a similar mistake last year taking our kids out of the local school and sending them to a private one in the city - BIG MISTAKE, which we realised after 3 semesters.
Can I ask why you think you had made a mistake and did you send them back to their original schools? Were you happier with the state system or was it just a case of preferring to be in the local area? I need to relax and stop feeling so guilty all the time!
Feb 27th 2006, 10:44 pm
#32
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Thanks for all the replies, I know that I have to try to be more positive and appreciate what is here.
I think that one of the main reasons I feel so sad is that only 2 months before we left England my husband's sister and brother-in-law moved back to the UK having lived for the past 12 years in the USA. He was made redundant from his job and decided that he would rather be in England. They seemed to have the ideal life to me - pool, lovely house, etc - which they have now given up but they say that they are happier than they have been in years. They have even left their sons behind (at 22 and 18 they are still studying and don't even remember living in England). They said that they loved the first years but towards the end they felt so low and couldn't wait to leave.
It was an unbelievable coincidence that they arrived as we were leaving (hope it was nothing personal
). My husband only has the one sister and they get along really well together. We had such a good time before we left and he is really missing her. They have been back to the USA 2 times already since December 
to try to help sort their boys' lives out, but at least it's a fairly quick/cheap flight to the states. They went there for a better life for their family and now they are living in two continents!
Kathy
I think that one of the main reasons I feel so sad is that only 2 months before we left England my husband's sister and brother-in-law moved back to the UK having lived for the past 12 years in the USA. He was made redundant from his job and decided that he would rather be in England. They seemed to have the ideal life to me - pool, lovely house, etc - which they have now given up but they say that they are happier than they have been in years. They have even left their sons behind (at 22 and 18 they are still studying and don't even remember living in England). They said that they loved the first years but towards the end they felt so low and couldn't wait to leave.
It was an unbelievable coincidence that they arrived as we were leaving (hope it was nothing personal
). My husband only has the one sister and they get along really well together. We had such a good time before we left and he is really missing her. They have been back to the USA 2 times already since December to try to help sort their boys' lives out, but at least it's a fairly quick/cheap flight to the states. They went there for a better life for their family and now they are living in two continents! Kathy
Feb 27th 2006, 10:55 pm
#33
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by kt.2006
You're absolutely right but we really need to decide where we may settle before taking them out of their schools otherwise we will be taking them out of their schools, putting them in local schools and then moving them again.
Can I ask why you think you had made a mistake and did you send them back to their original schools? Were you happier with the state system or was it just a case of preferring to be in the local area? I need to relax and stop feeling so guilty all the time!
Can I ask why you think you had made a mistake and did you send them back to their original schools? Were you happier with the state system or was it just a case of preferring to be in the local area? I need to relax and stop feeling so guilty all the time!
Secondly, this might sound obvious but the local school is the centre of the community. If your kids either stop going or don't go you miss out on all the friendships that flow through to you. Little thinks like bumping in to people you know in the shops, stuff like that, spontaneous invitations for coffee or for kids to come around and play.
OK, a third reason here. State schools rely on parents to get involved (some private do as well, but the one we sent our kids to didn't) so helping out at the local school is not only a way to make friends and get involved, you can also keep an eye on your kids to see how they're getting on.
Feb 28th 2006, 12:32 am
#34
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by kt.2006
It was an unbelievable coincidence that they arrived as we were leaving (hope it was nothing personal ). My husband only has the one sister and they get along really well together. We had such a good time before we left and he is really missing her. They have been back to the USA 2 times already since December to try to help sort their boys' lives out, but at least it's a fairly quick/cheap flight to the states. They went there for a better life for their family and now they are living in two continents!
Kathy
). My husband only has the one sister and they get along really well together. We had such a good time before we left and he is really missing her. They have been back to the USA 2 times already since December to try to help sort their boys' lives out, but at least it's a fairly quick/cheap flight to the states. They went there for a better life for their family and now they are living in two continents! Kathy
There is no guarantee that you would have all remained close by and in and out of each other's houses had you stayed in the UK. Obviously they had a great time after she got back, but that was partly the novelty of the situation.
My sister lived in Greece for 20 years before returning back to the UK about 8 years ago. When she was "at home" before leaving we didn't get on at all. Once she moved overseas, we got to like and love each other and built up a brilliant relationship.
After she moved back (10 min drive from my house), yes we still had that brilliant relationship but couldn't live in each other's pockets - Most of the time the contact was by phone what with work and lives etc)
She was the most upset out of everyone when we left, but we are back to e-mails and phone calls (skype and cheap cards) and as close as ever.
Feb 28th 2006, 3:44 am
#35
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by kt.2006
We have been here two months now and it is a great place. I have never been homesick before but I already know that I want to go home. I dread the future living here. I think we had a mid-life crisis in our decision to come here and we wanted the kids to grow up in a place far away from a nearby horrible town in the UK. Now I would gladly go back.
Before we came out here another family we knew of decided to come home after only six months and I couldn't believe that they hadn't given it longer. The trouble is the longer you do leave it the more expensive and difficult it gets to go back. At the moment we are renting a furnished house off relatives so if we went back now we would not have to buy any furniture or get out of a rental agreement.
Our kids love it but me and hubby do not want to live here. This is his first time out of work and we have both found it very difficult to get jobs. I think it would definitely be a better life for the kids here but nothing can prepare you for the loss you feel leaving family and familiar things behind.
I know it has only been 2 months but the longer I stay I feel more problems could occur, especially for the kids schooling. I already feel sad that I pulled my son out of school in England in year 10 which is the start of his GCSE year to come here. I feel if we go back now I am wrecking his schooling, but if we stay and we go back later then he will be even worse off.
My daughter also loves it here but from being the popular nutty one with loads of friends she now says that she is often lonely as the other kids 'just don't get her'.
Anyone with similar worries how did you come to your decision please???
I can't believe how I feel as I have never been homesick before and thought I would cope.
Kathy
Before we came out here another family we knew of decided to come home after only six months and I couldn't believe that they hadn't given it longer. The trouble is the longer you do leave it the more expensive and difficult it gets to go back. At the moment we are renting a furnished house off relatives so if we went back now we would not have to buy any furniture or get out of a rental agreement.
Our kids love it but me and hubby do not want to live here. This is his first time out of work and we have both found it very difficult to get jobs. I think it would definitely be a better life for the kids here but nothing can prepare you for the loss you feel leaving family and familiar things behind.
I know it has only been 2 months but the longer I stay I feel more problems could occur, especially for the kids schooling. I already feel sad that I pulled my son out of school in England in year 10 which is the start of his GCSE year to come here. I feel if we go back now I am wrecking his schooling, but if we stay and we go back later then he will be even worse off.
My daughter also loves it here but from being the popular nutty one with loads of friends she now says that she is often lonely as the other kids 'just don't get her'.
Anyone with similar worries how did you come to your decision please???
I can't believe how I feel as I have never been homesick before and thought I would cope.
Kathy
Good luck with everything, its only natural to miss things.
Paula.
Feb 28th 2006, 5:10 am
#36
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by renth
Secondly, this might sound obvious but the local school is the centre of the community. If your kids either stop going or don't go you miss out on all the friendships that flow through to you. Little thinks like bumping in to people you know in the shops, stuff like that, spontaneous invitations for coffee or for kids to come around and play.
Feb 28th 2006, 6:17 am
#37
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by renth
Two reasons, firstly we felt the state system wasn't good enough so we went private. Realised that (certainly for primary school kids) the private system was no better, in fact it was worse in our case. They are going private (again) for High School though, but this time to a local private school.
Secondly, this might sound obvious but the local school is the centre of the community. If your kids either stop going or don't go you miss out on all the friendships that flow through to you. Little thinks like bumping in to people you know in the shops, stuff like that, spontaneous invitations for coffee or for kids to come around and play.
OK, a third reason here. State schools rely on parents to get involved (some private do as well, but the one we sent our kids to didn't) so helping out at the local school is not only a way to make friends and get involved, you can also keep an eye on your kids to see how they're getting on.
Secondly, this might sound obvious but the local school is the centre of the community. If your kids either stop going or don't go you miss out on all the friendships that flow through to you. Little thinks like bumping in to people you know in the shops, stuff like that, spontaneous invitations for coffee or for kids to come around and play.
OK, a third reason here. State schools rely on parents to get involved (some private do as well, but the one we sent our kids to didn't) so helping out at the local school is not only a way to make friends and get involved, you can also keep an eye on your kids to see how they're getting on.
When they get to secondary school age we will be putting them in a private school, but for now we are extremely happy with the state system.
KT, sorry to hear you are feeling so down, if its any help there is a meet up planned in Brisbane at New Farm Park on the 22nd April, have a quick look for the thread & you wont be able to miss it, its on the first page or 2 of threads, perhaps that may help if you could go along to that? If nothing else it would give you a day out & the opportunity to meet some new people (most of whom are very nice, believe it or not
) who you may be able to keep in touch with 
.
Feb 28th 2006, 7:54 am
#38
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by kt.2006
We have been here two months now and it is a great place. I have never been homesick before but I already know that I want to go home. I dread the future living here. I think we had a mid-life crisis in our decision to come here and we wanted the kids to grow up in a place far away from a nearby horrible town in the UK. Now I would gladly go back.
Before we came out here another family we knew of decided to come home after only six months and I couldn't believe that they hadn't given it longer. The trouble is the longer you do leave it the more expensive and difficult it gets to go back. At the moment we are renting a furnished house off relatives so if we went back now we would not have to buy any furniture or get out of a rental agreement.
Our kids love it but me and hubby do not want to live here. This is his first time out of work and we have both found it very difficult to get jobs. I think it would definitely be a better life for the kids here but nothing can prepare you for the loss you feel leaving family and familiar things behind.
I know it has only been 2 months but the longer I stay I feel more problems could occur, especially for the kids schooling. I already feel sad that I pulled my son out of school in England in year 10 which is the start of his GCSE year to come here. I feel if we go back now I am wrecking his schooling, but if we stay and we go back later then he will be even worse off.
My daughter also loves it here but from being the popular nutty one with loads of friends she now says that she is often lonely as the other kids 'just don't get her'.
Anyone with similar worries how did you come to your decision please???
I can't believe how I feel as I have never been homesick before and thought I would cope.
Kathy
Before we came out here another family we knew of decided to come home after only six months and I couldn't believe that they hadn't given it longer. The trouble is the longer you do leave it the more expensive and difficult it gets to go back. At the moment we are renting a furnished house off relatives so if we went back now we would not have to buy any furniture or get out of a rental agreement.
Our kids love it but me and hubby do not want to live here. This is his first time out of work and we have both found it very difficult to get jobs. I think it would definitely be a better life for the kids here but nothing can prepare you for the loss you feel leaving family and familiar things behind.
I know it has only been 2 months but the longer I stay I feel more problems could occur, especially for the kids schooling. I already feel sad that I pulled my son out of school in England in year 10 which is the start of his GCSE year to come here. I feel if we go back now I am wrecking his schooling, but if we stay and we go back later then he will be even worse off.
My daughter also loves it here but from being the popular nutty one with loads of friends she now says that she is often lonely as the other kids 'just don't get her'.
Anyone with similar worries how did you come to your decision please???
I can't believe how I feel as I have never been homesick before and thought I would cope.
Kathy
Feb 28th 2006, 7:57 am
#39
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by kt.2006
I'm living in Samford which is about 20 km north west of Brisbane centre. It's actually very nice here with a lovely village centre. Trouble is we arrived in January when the schools were closed. We got a lot of advice about how the state schools were not very good (not true) and were persuaded against our better judgement by relatives to send the kids to catholic private schools.
The schools are good but they are miles away so now I spend half my day in the car taking them to/from school as it is not on a bus route. They love their schools but I feel so sad for them because in the UK they walked home from the local school and then went out to see their friends. This is not the easy care life I had planned when we moved to Australia as they now spend their evenings at home as they do not know any local children. They had a more outdoor life in the UK! I don't know anyone at the schools because they are so far away and I don't want to move to the area where the schools are. I have made things very difficult for myself and with hindsight I wish I had done things differently.
Sorry to hear about your brother, you must miss him desperately.
The schools are good but they are miles away so now I spend half my day in the car taking them to/from school as it is not on a bus route. They love their schools but I feel so sad for them because in the UK they walked home from the local school and then went out to see their friends. This is not the easy care life I had planned when we moved to Australia as they now spend their evenings at home as they do not know any local children. They had a more outdoor life in the UK! I don't know anyone at the schools because they are so far away and I don't want to move to the area where the schools are. I have made things very difficult for myself and with hindsight I wish I had done things differently.
Sorry to hear about your brother, you must miss him desperately.
I'm not too far from you, fancy a coffee one day ??? PM me it will be nice to catch up with a expat, I don't work at the moment during day so I can hopefully increase your social circle!!!
Our first christmas was awful and I would have jumped on a plane there and then, now you would have a job dragging me on one to go back to the UK, I am home and can't think of being anywhere else, but I know how you are feeling so PM me and we can meet up and anyone else who lives in the Northside and wants a coffee meet up.
Feb 28th 2006, 9:04 am
#40
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Hi Kathy
As others have said (I've not read the full thread though) two months is not a huge amount of time in the scale of things. It probably took me a good four months to consider feeling like it was homely and probably another couple of months after that until I was really happy. I use to be on here all the time, I now think this is my second time this year... I'm too busy doing all the things I use to do back in the UK only with better weather oh and theres the job with long hours of course, but with those hours came the promotion that means I can now go skiing in August 
Only you can make the decision for you (and your family), I would give it some time though and try not to pile on the pressure until you naturally reach a decision.
Good luck
As others have said (I've not read the full thread though) two months is not a huge amount of time in the scale of things. It probably took me a good four months to consider feeling like it was homely and probably another couple of months after that until I was really happy. I use to be on here all the time, I now think this is my second time this year... I'm too busy doing all the things I use to do back in the UK only with better weather
oh and theres the job with long hours of course, but with those hours came the promotion that means I can now go skiing in August Only you can make the decision for you (and your family), I would give it some time though and try not to pile on the pressure until you naturally reach a decision.
Good luck
Feb 28th 2006, 9:06 am
#41
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by macy
I'm not too far from you, fancy a coffee one day ??? PM me it will be nice to catch up with a expat, I don't work at the moment during day so I can hopefully increase your social circle!!!
Our first christmas was awful and I would have jumped on a plane there and then, now you would have a job dragging me on one to go back to the UK, I am home and can't think of being anywhere else, but I know how you are feeling so PM me and we can meet up and anyone else who lives in the Northside and wants a coffee meet up.
Our first christmas was awful and I would have jumped on a plane there and then, now you would have a job dragging me on one to go back to the UK, I am home and can't think of being anywhere else, but I know how you are feeling so PM me and we can meet up and anyone else who lives in the Northside and wants a coffee meet up.
I dont know where you are Macy but theres a few of us Northside in the Bracken Ridge/Murrumba Downs area... I'll see if I can get some of the girls to pm you and perhaps you can all meet up one day (I cant, I work in the city
)
Feb 28th 2006, 11:05 am
#42
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by mlbonner
I dont know where you are Macy but theres a few of us Northside in the Bracken Ridge/Murrumba Downs area... I'll see if I can get some of the girls to pm you and perhaps you can all meet up one day (I cant, I work in the city )
)
Feb 28th 2006, 11:11 am
#43
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Location: The Shoalhaven, New South Wales, Australia
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by ex-GLOS
We moved over 6 weeks ago now and are still in temporary housing for another couple of weeks. I knew it would be tough to adjust, but I hadn't thought it would be so up and then so down. We have a great day at the beach and are all happy and then I'm running around trying to buy all this furniture and get so overwhelmed. Half the time I'm sure it'll all be great and then half the time I'm wondering what in the world we are doing. I'm hoping when we get our place sorted out it'll feel more like we can get started. On the plus side, my 10 year old son loves it and doesn't want to move ever again.
Feb 28th 2006, 8:19 pm
#44
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by Hutch
Let me tell you mate - you're not missing anything here back in Glos. Bitterly cold, snowing, gritters out and about, etc etc. It was so bitter yesterday that when I took the family pooch up to Minchinhampton Common for a walk, she sniffed around a bit and then went and stood back by the car!! Lot more of this till spring breaks ...
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Feb 28th 2006, 9:53 pm
#45
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Re: Feel like we want to go home
Originally Posted by kt.2006
I can't believe how I feel as I have never been homesick before and thought I would cope.
Kathy
I hope you can ride through it, if not then you know where you should be. Good luck