Mrs X

that the stresses of immigrating make you think it's not worth it?

I think my partner and I have argued more in the past 6 months than we have since we've known each other, and that's a long time!.

Selling houses, leaving jobs and applying for the visa seem to be things that most people are dealing with quite well. Is it just me then?

Mrs X

Natbat

Mrs X, bear with it, it really is worth all the stress, keep going and remember this is what you really want

I admit we didn't have to sell a house (live with parents) but the preparation of the application and getting all the info together was a big strain and we too had the odd row over different things.

Keep your chin up and once you have the visa I am sure things will return to normal

Bye for now
Nat

leanda

Its nearly as bad as organising my wedding!! But not quite, its gonna be worth it, anything worth having takes a while if it didn't you might not want it!!!

kittenlips

Dear Mrs X

No you are not alone! Believe me, my husband and I have rowed more in the last year than we ever have. It suddenly seems like we don't agree on anything at all! But I don't think we are alone. Moving house is supposed to be one of the most stressful things ever, so on top of that you've got new job, new country, new friends, new life full stop - it's bound to have a massive impact on anyone!

Hang in there, look at it as a good test of your relationship. If you can get through this, you can get through anything!

Good luck

jayne+doug

No matter how solid your relationship this is a stressfull time and it really does have a negative effect on relationships. A big part of this is the fact that you are helpless in terms of a lot of what you can and can't do. There is a lot of just waiting to see what what happens and that feeling of not beeing in control has the effect of causing friction. So you are not alone by any streach so hang in there. We feel the same and we are only at the stage of waiting for the skills assessments. I dread to think what it will be like when we are to sell the house, will we have enough money, will the kids be ok, will I miss Scotland. All these things go through your head 24-7. Stress is what gets you through it, if it were too easy we may all just not bother!!!

Cheers
Jayne & dougie

Phoenixuk2oz

Don't despair. It's not just you Mrs X

IMHO I think it's part of the selection process. Perhaps DIMIA score people out of the system.......... not in? This way there are fewer failures [people have tried so hard they areLESS likely to give in as easily maybe?].

Keep smiling......keep using this forum..... and don't let it get ya down

Phoenixuk2oz

Mrs X

Thanks guys for all your words of advice. I know deep down it will get better and be OK. On some days it feels like it would be easier to give in and keep with what we know, but need to see that 'bigger picture' more often.

Best to all of you.

Mrs X

Pollyana

One thing I have learnt throughout this whole process, is that whatever you are going through, and whatever feelings you have about the whole migration things, there are people out there who know EXACTLY how you feel...... and somehow that makes things less daunting.

Dreamaway 10

Too true,many people out there are in the same boat.
Years ago it used to be a lot easier to emigarate especially to OZ,but like everything these days nothing is ever easy.
The thing I reckon is that if they are so fussy over the selection of people they let obviously they don't want any riff raff.
I too hope its all worth it,cos the stress only really kicks in once your there as there are loads of other things you need to do.
Once your all settled in your new life you will be able to reflect on all the work you had to do and then decide is it worth it or not?
and heres hoping that it will be.

S Oldfield

I have found the whole period a bloody nightmare, getting through Tra, submitting the application preparing the house to go on the market, dealing with members of the family that are in denial that you are going..........as well as keeping your relationship going with your partner without killing each other.holding down a very stressful full time job..........and with 2 teenage boys in the house who cant seem to understand why the process takes so long despite me telling them at least 50 times!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mrs X

That all rings so true. I think it's hard for our families to understand and appreciate the stress we are all under. Wish we could put them in our shoes for a day to realise that the decorating in the house doens't do itself, the never ending pages of the visa application are not something that you can do in 10 minutes, and that getting your stuff from one country to another requires a lot of planning.

Ah I miss the simple life some days, but bring on those deserted beaches and sunshine and I'll forget all of this in a minute :0)

bettytweena

I can definately empathise with Mrs X and everyone else......we too are still in the initial stages of the process, and are currently waiting for both skills assessments to come through.....
Along side this, we are also dealing with a court battle (I use that term seriously!!) about whether one of our sons can come with us, as my ex doesn't want him to!
Alongside the waiting game (which is destroying at times) the guilt (how could I take my son away from his father) the worry (will the kids settle ok) the arguements (me & hubby, white is black and black is white......), the work in the house, accumulating documentation......need I go on...we just need to stay focused on the end goal, take comfort that many more people out there share the same dreams and aspirations, and keep sounding off on this forum, so that people like us, can empathise and give us fab advise......thanks to you all, without the support we give and receive, this process would be 10x worse

S Oldfield

Yep been there.......done that......got the court order..house on market monday...........meds next friday...........hopefully Perth by September.....have had along journey since we started last january (2003), packed in the fags...been to court....put on almost 2 stone.....suddenly got high blood pressure.then got signed off work for a month as I was completely stressed out!!!!So bad that I was really ill!!

S Oldfield

There are also some brilliant people on here that will really help you out..Pollyanna, Mrs dagboy, Bundy, larissa, PodgyPossum even WBB to name but a few..The list could go on forever.

bettytweena

we have an agent for the technical stuff...but the personal, emotional and psychological stuff, boy, you lot get the award for that
funny really, you could never really prepare yourself for how you feel once you start the process..there is just so much to think about, and emotions that come up that you have never experienced before...
we thought reaching the pass mark, getting positive assessments and telling my mum would be the hard bit......how wrong could i have been........... LOL