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Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
PMSL. Great Post.
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Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Originally Posted by Timber Floor Au
:eek:
Was at work today, and Debs calls me... She is whispering, and im in a crap signal area... I lose my temper, and tell her speak up, as im hanging off a ladder, fag in me gob, fone in nape of neck, and 60 kilo aircon balancing on my Didgereedont. ! lol She yells " THERES A F*****G SNAKE JUST SLITHERED UP THE HALL !! YOU TERWATTT !!!" silence .... ..... you still there, she whispers... Yer , I am lol, was it big... WAS !!!!! SHE SCREAMS you mean I S ! Ive locked myself in my office, and its heading towards your office and kids rooms... im phoning the snakeman !!! Luckily, when webought the house, previous owners gave us details of water tank ppl, plumber, lawn man, and a snakeman ! For 2 hrs I couldnt, call her as I have no credit on my crappy mobile.. i have a brainwave, use my mates fone !! im a geniarse !! I call her, and snakeman has been, but found nothing. Said it sounds like a green tree snake, and they are pretty harmless, no venom, but can bite, and secrete a wet fart if provoked. I arrive home from work, and shes still locked in her office. I have a scout around, and to cut long story short, we find the snake curled up behind sons bookcase in his bedroom. Its a BIGGUN !! I shout debs to get me some, barbecue tongs !! She yells back, what ya gonna do with them, !!! I yell back, cook us a fuc*** barby ya daft cow !!! ( in sarcky angry monotone ) Terwattt she yells back, and scurries in with small bbq tongs ! and some palmolive marigold glovs , hurls them at me and skidaddles !!! I try in vain to grab the snake, it is a green tree snake, the bugger is to strong for my Bunnings BBQ tongs. I yell to debs, get me a hook and a mop stick... Keeping a beedy eye on the snake, who im getting to like, i create this blue peter snake catcher thingy. I test it, its crap. The snake, is about 1.2 metres long, and at his fattest about babies leg thickness. Bright olive green, and a yellow head, with huge forked tongue. He clambers up the window, and perches himself atop my sons, curtain pole. Debs calls the snakeman, who inbetween coming around earlier, and now, has been having a few drinks with his mates. She goes and picks him up. This is no bullshit, i swear !!! They arrive back 10 mins later, and I for the 1st time, meet our SNAKEMAN ! Hes about 50-55, weighing 50 kilos wringing wet, covered in tattoos, no teeth, a snake hook, a snake bag and only one arm YES ONE ARM !!!! Was like the fella outta robins nest !!! He clambers on chair, bag in teeth, and grabs the snake, lobs it in the bag, and says THERE YA GO !!! Well Debs was so pleased, she yelled YIPPEEE , I was gonna shake his hand, but got confused, so didnt, and said thanks... He left !! |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Originally Posted by Timber Floor Au
Hes about 50-55, weighing 50 kilos wringing wet, covered in tattoos, no teeth, a snake hook, a snake bag and only one arm
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Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Thank you for cheering me up soory had to laugh i have had a crap week and you have just made my day can't wait to show hubby your post when he gets home from work.
Poshrice :D |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
that was funny, im unwell and that cheered me up thanks!! :)
mand |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Originally Posted by Timber Floor Au
:eek:
Was at work today, and Debs calls me... She is whispering, and im in a crap signal area... I lose my temper, and tell her speak up, as im hanging off a ladder, fag in me gob, fone in nape of neck, and 60 kilo aircon balancing on my Didgereedont. ! lol She yells " THERES A F*****G SNAKE JUST SLITHERED UP THE HALL !! YOU TERWATTT !!!" silence .... ..... you still there, she whispers... Yer , I am lol, was it big... WAS !!!!! SHE SCREAMS you mean I S ! Ive locked myself in my office, and its heading towards your office and kids rooms... im phoning the snakeman !!! Luckily, when webought the house, previous owners gave us details of water tank ppl, plumber, lawn man, and a snakeman ! For 2 hrs I couldnt, call her as I have no credit on my crappy mobile.. i have a brainwave, use my mates fone !! im a geniarse !! I call her, and snakeman has been, but found nothing. Said it sounds like a green tree snake, and they are pretty harmless, no venom, but can bite, and secrete a wet fart if provoked. I arrive home from work, and shes still locked in her office. I have a scout around, and to cut long story short, we find the snake curled up behind sons bookcase in his bedroom. Its a BIGGUN !! I shout debs to get me some, barbecue tongs !! She yells back, what ya gonna do with them, !!! I yell back, cook us a fuc*** barby ya daft cow !!! ( in sarcky angry monotone ) Terwattt she yells back, and scurries in with small bbq tongs ! and some palmolive marigold glovs , hurls them at me and skidaddles !!! I try in vain to grab the snake, it is a green tree snake, the bugger is to strong for my Bunnings BBQ tongs. I yell to debs, get me a hook and a mop stick... Keeping a beedy eye on the snake, who im getting to like, i create this blue peter snake catcher thingy. I test it, its crap. The snake, is about 1.2 metres long, and at his fattest about babies leg thickness. Bright olive green, and a yellow head, with huge forked tongue. He clambers up the window, and perches himself atop my sons, curtain pole. Debs calls the snakeman, who inbetween coming around earlier, and now, has been having a few drinks with his mates. She goes and picks him up. This is no bullshit, i swear !!! They arrive back 10 mins later, and I for the 1st time, meet our SNAKEMAN ! Hes about 50-55, weighing 50 kilos wringing wet, covered in tattoos, no teeth, a snake hook, a snake bag and only one arm YES ONE ARM !!!! Was like the fella outta robins nest !!! He clambers on chair, bag in teeth, and grabs the snake, lobs it in the bag, and says THERE YA GO !!! Well Debs was so pleased, she yelled YIPPEEE , I was gonna shake his hand, but got confused, so didnt, and said thanks... He left !! What a fantastic fun filled life you lead!! :D Fricking hysterical! |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
PMSL :D
where do snake catchers release caught snakes? I can just imagine them driving around looking for a house of POMs for the snake to find more people to scare the $**t out of, for them to call the snake charmer in. :eek: |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Timber Floor Au again. |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Picking myself up off the floor, dusting myself down, refilling my lungs with air after hysterical laughter...brilliant story, love it!
BTW how are the Newfs going Down Under? |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
that is the funniest thing ive read in ages.
not sure which bit.....the thought of you up a ladder, fag in gob etc.......or you peeing your pants at an itsy bitsy worm!! only kidding :) ps like how it stuck its tongue out at you as you took the pic!! must be stage trained ;) |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
I almost missed this!!!! :eek:
LMFAO!!! |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
I think it`s about time you got yourself a new mobile for Debs sake!!! :scared:
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Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Originally Posted by bundy
Picking myself up off the floor, dusting myself down, refilling my lungs with air after hysterical laughter...brilliant story, love it!
BTW how are the Newfs going Down Under? Great to see ya !!!!!!!!!!! We are all doin well, well... the newfs struggled yesterday amongst the commotion and debs locking herself, in her office with 17 pairs of knickers stuffed up against the door gap... she had walked in the office to check her dogzonline emails and messages, with a basketful of knickers, and sat down... spotted the snake, SLAMMED door shut, shakin the made in china engraving off the hinges in the process, and furtively ramming my best skids against the gap at bottom of the door.. PMSL !! The Newfs then, just picture it, can see thru window, my missus surfing the web, whilst stood, tom n jerry style on her chair. !! The puppies missed a feed , the big dogs missed everything, they were running round the garden chasing spiders... OK ILL EXPAND !! We have 4 big dogs, split into 2 paddocks, 2 in each... and 3 puppies. Willy and Bella, come out of their kennels of a mornin, debs fetches feeds and waters the chooks, who drink an INORDINATE amount of water... anywat, bella and willy nuzzle chooks pen.. and get spider webs on their noses... They then hilariously spend about an hour, running up and down the field, chasing the webs which are on the end of their fu****G noses !! LMFAO !! The dogs are all good, anyways, and Im being extremely vigilant of late, with the grass.. Neighbour has had ticks in his field, which im GUTTED ! about.. and debs friend in Melbun has just lost a 17 week puppy from tick paralysis. So we have again bathed all the mutts in hydrobath, cut grass so its sharper than Billy Connolys wit ... shaved willy, as he is a MINGER ! and was suffering from carrying his double coat atop a 70 kilo frame. Debs did cpl of dog shows at weekend, and has last dog show this weekend at Durack I think. On Saturday... Was amazin, I went to see her on Saturday, and ppl kept coming up to her and saying its you !! your Debsvirgo aint ya ... off www.dogzonline.com.au !!!!! YER she said, and then I was introduced... hey Steve this is BrownLabrador... PMSL !! I said Hi Im DogsBollocks.. :) pleased to meet ya lmffao... Was weird being introduced by a forum name, dogsbollocks was a lie incidentally. How are you goin, what ya upto, whats the go, hows your mum, hows life ???????? So good to seeya online again. Steve |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Many many thanks to everyones replies !!!
I think its nearly 2 years since i had a +1000 viewed post lol !! Steve |
Re: Debs shocked !!!!!
Imagine the story if you and PP joined forces, Steve :D
Julie |
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