karawara88

It would seem that several posters already have contacts in either OZ or NZ, this is either because they or their partner is already from OZ or NZ. Some posters have already lived in OZ/NZ as a child or have family who live there.

I assume that having a network of family/ friends can ease many aspects of migrating but maybe it also creates other issues.

I am intrigued by those posters who have yet to migrate, when they assume that some of us already over here are not giving it a fair go. I think we all have different measuring sticks on what we are willing or able to cope with in life. Migrating is not the be all and end all. Life is full of different opportunities and everyone goes through trials and tribulations on the road to migration so why would anyone consider anyones difficulties as a failure.

I think Pollyana is very brave, she is leaving behind her life to pursue happiness with her 'bloke' in a different country. I am sure is aware of the challenges and joys in front of her and I wish her every happiness.

We have no family or friends over here, that means we have to make extra efforts to establish networks but I think it also gives us freedom to choose our life here without having to consider anyone else. It may be good to have people to give advice, but personally I wouldn't follow the advice of most of my family which makes me wonder about the amount of faith you have in the family members that are guiding or supporting you.

Anyway I thought this was an interesting topic and I have put together a little poll to look at the figures.


Donna

downunderpom

We've been here for over a year now. No friends or family to come to, so all up to us. But I was brought up in Oz (migrated as part of a ten quid UK family unit), so had an idea of what to expect.

DianeOZ

Swings and roundabouts, we have family here and would never even have considered moving to Aus if we had not been out to visit them but it does complicate things like you say, you feel you have to take their advice (usually crap) and they will be offended if you do different.

To be honest, I'd rather it was just us but then I'd probably feel isolated. Even though we are not close (eeeK), my subconcious is telling me we'll be okay cos we have family here. The fact that I'd rather ask friends to babysit than them is a totally different thing!!

Difficult one.

Di

downunderpom

We don't have any kids, so that is one less worry for us - don't have to worry about babysitters, new schools, disruption, leaving their friends behind. Mind you - I went to 15 different schools (we travelled a lot) in 4 countries, and I loved it! I wouldn't change any part of my childhood in Oz, so I would say that your kids will thank you in years to come for bringing them here.

brisnick

i came out on my own. no friends or family out here. found it pretty tough at times, but i persisted cause i knew i wanted to be in australia. 2.5 years on and things are great. i'm a permanent resident, have a job, live in a great apartment, have a gorgeous aussie gf and i'm loving life way more than i ever did in the uk, even if i do miss going to the pub with my mates, and watching real football!

Simone

I lived in Oz from when I was 5 till 14. I am now 21.
I have kept in contact with 4 of my friends from then and of course I still know some of the friends of my parents.

I would probably never have considered going to Australia if I hadn't been there before.
I had a great childhood, and I know it will be different now that I'm an adult, so I really don't know if we'll stay for a few years, or that we'll end up staying for ever.

I wouldn't consider moving to Sydney, Brisbane, Melbourne, NZ, Canada, and I think that's just because I know Perth and some people there!
I'm not that adventurous that'd I'd move to a country where I've never been.

I would like to live in the south west of WA, but I don't think it'd be easy with work, so we'll start out in Perth, and maybe move further at a later stage, if we do stay in Oz that is!

bundy

That's pretty brave - good on ya!

I'm going back to Oz with my aussie partner but I've been to Oz a few times and lived there for a year. In fact, I think we have more friends out there than we do here...and some of our friends from the UK are emigrating too. There's family here, and that's about the only tie...but then he has family there, so it's swings and roundabouts, as others have said.

Luckily, we are still young (25 & 26) and have no kids, no property, no debts and no huge careers, so it's easy for us to up sticks and move. I have a lot of respect for those trying to move a whole family and household to a place where they have few ties.

bawi

Interesting thread!
I often wondered what the different reasons are for people to go to the other side of the world. I also think that the contents of the posts and what they say differs a lot, if they have been there for minimum a year and even have contacts or if they go there without ever have seen the place. I am not judging anyone, but feel many of the totally new people might be disappointed, maybe also positively surprised?
Well, I do what Pollyana does, going to live with my boyfriend, as I have better chances there than he has here (Switzerland). Also because I like the country and have met his family, have a job to go to...etc. We just want to be a normal couple, no more long distance thing!
It will certainly be interesting to read peoples posts after they have been there for a while and to compare their expectations to what they have found there.

That was just some of my thoughts, not sure if they are clear enough as sometimes I struggle with the English language.

Have a good day to all...
Barbara

Simone

Just want to agree with the first remark, and say about the second bit:
Our situation is very similar(21 and 26), and I also have a LOT of respect for those with families etc. My parents did it too, and I have a lot of respect for them. What helped them I think was that they aren't/weren't that close with their parents, my dad even wanted to sort of 'get away' from his family.
But I and my boyfriend are quite close to our parents, so it could be difficult, and that's why I am seriously thinking we might be back in a few years. Especially when I have kids; I can't imagine having them and being without my mum and MIL, who I can also get along with very well. But of course if we like Australia so much, we might end up staying there, and try to give our kids such a great childhood like my parents gave me.
Ah, we'll just have to see, like I've been saying all the time....

Pollyana

Good thread Donna - and thanks for the good wishes! I sometimes wonder whether I'm brave or just plain daft, but I think once I get there I shall enjoy it. Its a bit daunting going to a new life when I'm nearly 40, but if I don't go, I will always regret it.
I shall miss my friends here in the UK, probably more than most of my family, and I don't make friends that easily, so thats another hurdle to overcome. Although I know I'm lucky having a new family out there to join, its not the same as having your mates around (hence I shall be back on the internet asap). One thing that I'm really looking forward to is meeting up with other people from the site - because we all know what each of us is going through, and we can form our own sort-of support group! That doesn't mean I don't want Aussie friends too, its just the thing of having someone who identifies with the same things from back in the UK, and someone who understands the strangeness of some things! And as DianeOz said, having family around means they want to give you advice - while I value the advice of my "new" family, some of it doesn't really fit ME - but its a tricky line to walk, trying not to offend anyone! Best example of that so far is that my future M-in-L (in Oz) has Ideas about my wedding outfit... hich sound good, but aren't me! So I have made sure I've bought the whole thing over here - nothing posh, just a trouser suit, and then I can say I had to get it here so MY family can see it, I hope she doesn't get offended, but she can't rule my life.

bundy

Yep, the kids thing is tricky. But in our situation, one person is always going to have to live 'away from home' as we are an aussie/british couple. Our way of looking at it is that it will always be easier for my family to go over to Oz than it would be for his family to come over to the UK. My family has the means and inclination to do so (they're desperate to visit Oz!), his don't. So, in terms of children, although it will be tough for me to start producing over there, away from my mum, my parents can come and visit...his family would go years without seeing their grandkids or whatever.

Plus I want to bring up any future children in Oz, not the UK...

It's not been a hard decision at all, but I'm blessed with a family that lives all over the world anyway and is thus used to keeping up close ties with relatives in far-flung corners of the earth.

Pollyana

I'm not planning on producing any little Pollyanas, but if I were, I would certainly prefer the Aussie lifestyle for them. My sister would love hers to be brought up out there, for the outdoor lifestyle, must be better for them.

Elaine M

My sister and all her (now grown up ) family went to Adelaidein 1991. I probably wouldn't have thought about going to Australia if I hadn't heard how much better her lifestyle is there than it was here.

I never used to be very close to her as we lived in different parts of the UK after we both left home, but we've got much closer over the last few years, especially since I started planning to go over there; she's been very honest about the pros and cons which gave me lots to think about.

She's doing her best to help me (sponsoring me etc although I provided the actual money for the bond - my idea) and will help me to settle when I finally make the move next year.

I can envisage staying somewhere within rwach but not on the doorstep as I'd like to make my own life but include her and the family in that life.

Elaine

Simone

Yep, that's good logica.

Oh, I wish my family would just move to OZ with us. On my side it's only convincing my brother and his girlfriend. Because then the decision for my parents would be very easy, especially for my dad, he'd be with us in weeks!
And then my parents in law and brother in law. Brother in law we get along with very very well, and next year he's going on a world trip and coming to visit us, so maybe then we can convince him... And he doesn't have a girlfriend at the moment, so that helps!
And then my parents in law are probably coming for a holiday when we've been there about 6 months(december 04) so then we can convince them!
hmmmm, maybe it won't be too hard?

ohsohopeful

I have a cousin in Sydney, whom we visited on our holiday at Easter. BF has some contacts via ex-colleagues who have migrated and we made some good friends in Brisbane during our holiday. Although none of our contacts are especially close, we know a few people.

We have spoken to quite a few people in the UK who decided not to migrate in the end and the main reason they cite is that one partner didn't want to leave their family. I would say the majority of people who decided not to go that we have spoken to do regret not giving it a try and are very excited and complimentary when they hear that we're going.

We have no kids and won't be, so it's just the 2 of us which makes it easier I think. Both sets of parents have given us their blessing to go, which is great.

It seems crazy to re-evaluate your life to such an extent as this without then going for it. As Podgypossum said, it's easy to stagnate into old age if we stand still and don't try new stuff.