Bottling it up....
Jan 27th 2004 | 5:47 am
#1
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Bottling it up....
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
Jan 27th 2004 | 5:49 am
#2
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 2,289
From: Eatons Hill, Brisbane
Re: Bottling it up....
Originally posted by debbie and rich
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
regards
rach, mark and chanelle x
Jan 27th 2004 | 5:57 am
#3
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Thanks for that .Luckily he says he DOES still want to come .I think this stems from spending last weekend with his dad and of course kids know when not to mention things so he didn't and true to his nature my ex didn't!! It must be like livng in 2 parrallel worlds, one where everyone you know asks you how its all going etc and the other where its not talked about !!
I'm glad he told me how he feels so that we can give some extra support, i'm toying with biting the bullet and speaking to his dad about it , trouble is I know what hes like he bottles it all up!! I suppose its a good sign that my son was able to get it all out eventually!!
debbie
I'm glad he told me how he feels so that we can give some extra support, i'm toying with biting the bullet and speaking to his dad about it , trouble is I know what hes like he bottles it all up!! I suppose its a good sign that my son was able to get it all out eventually!!
debbie
Jan 27th 2004 | 5:57 am
#4
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Re: Bottling it up....
Originally posted by debbie and rich
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
Hope things improve
I have two children who will be leaving their Dad behind but it has now been nearly a year since we talked of our plans. Many emotions, tears etc.. but they have gone from sad syndrome to can't wait the more time has gone on and the more research we have done.
Kids are usually the first to settle from what I have heard.
Also my youngest son cried everytime we mentioned OZ. Now he can't wait to leave
Hope things work out
Earlswood
Jan 27th 2004 | 5:58 am
#5
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 102
From: portsmouth
Re: Bottling it up....
Originally posted by debbie and rich
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:03 am
#6
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Thanks again for that. Trouble is we seem to be going he other way as he has been really excited for the last year or so and I suppose the enormity of what we are doing has crept in.
I'm sure he'll be Ok I just wish his dad would chat to him and hopefully support son emotionally as I know his dad isnt against it but obviously is upset
Being a teenager is bad enough any way without allthis going round in his head.
Debbie
I'm sure he'll be Ok I just wish his dad would chat to him and hopefully support son emotionally as I know his dad isnt against it but obviously is upset
Being a teenager is bad enough any way without allthis going round in his head.
Debbie
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:03 am
#7
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 102
From: portsmouth
It must be really sad to experience your sons upset. My son is 15 and still says that he is not going with us. He is leaving his dad but he has no contact with him. The only reason why he want to stay is that he can still be with his friends and family. My daughter is 12 and cannot wait.
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:05 am
#8
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 18
From: South Australia
It it stressfull for all concerned, only an hour ago my wife punched me in face.
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:08 am
#9
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Morrie,
What are your plans then? Do you think your son will come around as I dont believe my son will get to the I'm not coming stage (Ihope!) but I can imagine how awful that must feel.
I dont know how long till you plan to go but hope he comes round in the end.
Debbie
What are your plans then? Do you think your son will come around as I dont believe my son will get to the I'm not coming stage (Ihope!) but I can imagine how awful that must feel.
I dont know how long till you plan to go but hope he comes round in the end.
Debbie
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:12 am
#10
....is FAB
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,580
From: Sunshine Coast
Re: Bottling it up....
Originally posted by debbie and rich
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
I just feel so terrible at the moment... Everything has been going really well for us but I had a bit of a wake up call regarding my teenage son this evening. I had just popped out to my friend in the next road and was gone 5 minutes. When i came back my son was really upset because he had "lost it "with his youngest sister. He said she was being awkward and cheeky , nrmally he handles her really well but he said he was really shouting at her
.Anyway to get to the point I said how come your so upset and angry and of course it all spilled out about going to OZ. Its not that he doesnt want to go but its because he is leaving hisdad behind. The trouble is although his dad has not voiced any objection he is the strong silent type he doesnt show his feelings. His dad doesnt mention it at all and so my son feels that he can't say anything and doesnt know how his dad feels, it must be really hard for him as its getting really close now and I dont want my son to be stressed about it all.
Anyway I think he feels a bit better for getting it off his chest, although I think my daughter was quite shocked that her big brother could shout so loud !! By the way when I say he lost it , he didnt hurt her in anyway!!
Its good that its all come out....I bet he feels soo much better now he's got it all off his chest
It must be stressful for him...he's prob confused too as his dad doesn't show his feelings. I think it might not be a bad idea to talk with his dad so that he knows how your lad feels and so he can talk to him about it. Plus don't forget that your lad is on an emotional rollercoaster anyway with all those raging hormones!!!!! My eldest (13) regularly loses it with his brother and sister as they annoy him intensely so if your lad is normally good with his sister be glad!! 
See you on the 7th!!!!
Petra
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:12 am
#11
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Portsmouth
By the way Morrie I live in Portsmouth too!!. are yor family going t
o the pompey meetup next week??
Debbie
o the pompey meetup next week??
Debbie
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:19 am
#12
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Petra,
I must admit it was a shock as my middle daughter was saying that Josh was REALLY LOUD mummy. Hes normally really easy going and patient Hes probably being building up all these feeling for a while.
I do get a bit angry with his dad because sometimes you have to be the adult and put aside how you feel and just listen to what kids have to say
Anyway there all best friends upstairs at the mo taking advantage of me being on here !!
Looking forward to seeing you next week, I nearly phoned you in the xmas hols to see how you were getting along but I got a bit shy !! How mature am i!!
Deb
I must admit it was a shock as my middle daughter was saying that Josh was REALLY LOUD mummy. Hes normally really easy going and patient Hes probably being building up all these feeling for a while.
I do get a bit angry with his dad because sometimes you have to be the adult and put aside how you feel and just listen to what kids have to say
Anyway there all best friends upstairs at the mo taking advantage of me being on here !!
Looking forward to seeing you next week, I nearly phoned you in the xmas hols to see how you were getting along but I got a bit shy !! How mature am i!!
Deb
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:24 am
#13
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,927
From: Sussex
Best of luck Debbie and Rich i hope everything works out in the end. Our 14 yr old is adament that he is going no where, and only time will tell if he changes his mind or not.
footie chick
footie chick
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:26 am
#14
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 102
From: portsmouth
Debbie an Rich
We live in Copnor. We are going to the meet up but I'm not sure about my son. I am trying to word it to him in the right way of how it might help him to talk to other children. Who knows he might even see a face he knows. My friend Sandra who lives across the road from me is going as she is also hoping to emigrate by September. Her son of 16 is a friend of my boy but he is really looking forward to leaving England. In the end my son does not really get a choice about staying in England as he is only 15 and will not leave his mum. I wish!
Jan 27th 2004 | 6:29 am
#15
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Morrie
Hope you manage to convince him to come I think there may be quite a few in that age group . Hopefully it will help to talk to others experiencing similar feelings to them.
See you there
Deb
Hope you manage to convince him to come I think there may be quite a few in that age group . Hopefully it will help to talk to others experiencing similar feelings to them.
See you there
Deb
