Margaret2

Is there any teenagers out there who are going to Perth or already there who can share experiences with my 14 year old daughter who definatley does not want to go I think if she made contact with more teenagers there or going through the same feelings it would help

Thanks

TrickyTrev

Hi Margaret, Can't help out with the Perth issue i'm afraid but just wanted to say that we have empathy with you as we also have a 15 year old who doesn't want to go!! (silly bugger) We have two friends (separate couples) who emigrated to Oz both about two years ago now and they also had a teenage son and daughter (one each!!!) that did not want to go and made life difficult at the time. They have both settled now and did so fairly quickly. Hope that gives you some comfort for what the future holds. It does us!!! Good luck. Trev xx

Margaret2

Thanks it does give me some comfort, any chance on this site I get I post something about my reluctant teenager, but still need a whole lot more reassurance.

Do you worry about your 15 year old school work, I tried to get hubby to stay in the UK for another 2 years in order for her to complete school and get u.k recognised exams incase we go and have to return, but his argument is the longer we leave it the harder it will be for her and I can see his point, but can also see mine about the schooling thing.

Sujy

Hi Margaret

I can only sympathise. Our 19 year old daughter announced this week that she no longer wants to come with us. She announced it on the day we moved out of our house (31/10) - which unfortunately happened to be her 19th birthday. I really think that the whole thing is just too overwhelming for teenagers. It is over whelming for us - but lets face it we are older and wiser!?!

We have managed to persuade her to validate the entry - then all we can do is take it one day at a time. I have managed to get in touch with some lovely people in Melbourne via the forum who have teenagers (unfortunately a little younger than Dan).

We fly out on the 28th November so I am hoping that things work out for us.

Good luck with your search for teenagers in Perth - I am sure there must be some. Try later - as it is still early morning there. Try to post it when it is early evening - you may get more replies that way.

Take Care

Su J

Margaret2

Thanks sending you karma for that

TrickyTrev

Do you worry about your 15 year old school work, I tried to get hubby to stay in the UK for another 2 years in order for her to complete school and get u.k recognised exams incase we go and have to return, but his argument is the longer we leave it the harder it will be for her and I can see his point, but can also see mine about the schooling thing.[/QUOTE]

Remember the school year starts in January in Oz. If she will see most of those last two years in Oz I say go now!!! As for us, Luke (the 15 year old), finishes school next June and we are whipping him straight off in July before he settles into the school holidays!!! I am certain that he will be fine when he settles in and makes new friends. If I catch him on a 'good day' he accepts and understands this and has even admitted a big part of him not wanting to go is the fear of leaving his friends behind and having no one at the other end. It is a big world and we have tried to tell him that many people will walk in AND out of his life. This is the journey of life. At the end of the day we have to remember they are teenagers!!! We have all been there haven't we!!! A LONG time ago for me though Mags!!! Keep smiling. Catch ya later,
Love Trev xx

Tiggs+Graz

Hi
Our 15 year old was not too happy about moving to oz but we have come to a compromise that works for all of us - in a bit less than three years time he will be finished his A levels and hopefully off to uni. We will make the move (visa allowing) at that time and he will validate his visa and then decide where he wants to be. He is currently looking at unis in both oz and the uk and he is much happier knowing that he will be making his own decision with all the options open to him.

This does mean that we have to hold off moving for a little bit longer (it adds about 18 months to our original plan) and there is the chance that he will decide to stay in the uk (which i will have to face if it comes to that!!) but since we worked this out he is actually talking about 'when i am in australia'!!!

Obvioulsy this sort of solution would not work for everyone but fingers crossed it has sorted things out for us and it means that the whole family will be happy when we do move.

Tiggs

Luke I Amyofath

Ive madea suggestion on the site feedback forum that BE perhaps start a forum for the children of migrating parents. Bottom line is that as a parent youre the boss and if you want to migrate youre going to but the children need to chat with people their own age to vent or get reassurance from their own age group. Chatting about migration to their friends at school isnt quite the same as the views they would get from other kids who are in the same boat.

Just my 2 cents worth

NickyP

We have moved over about 6 weeks ago and are settling in Victoria very well. However our 16 year old son is still not happy about being here. He has settled at school and made loads of friends and is out at least as much as he was when we lived in Belgium, but the girlfriend is still in Belgium. It is still early days but we do not have the strong network of friends and family in the UK and definately not in Belgium so he has had to come which at least he is being mature about. But every other sentence is that he wants to be heading back ASAP, he is talking about getting a job to afford the airfares to go back on holiday (talking mind you not doing) and most of the time he is fine but we do get the occasional strop. He is determined to go to Uni in the USA as by then apparently the girlfriend's family will be returning there, however we can't afford overseas uni fees especially in the USA and our son while intelligent has no concept of finances.
We will get through this and I know that we are lucky that he understands that we aren't stopping him through anything other than family not stepping up and offering him somewhere to stay and us not having the spare cash (he is the eldest of 4). I hope that one day we can work out a way to help him to be happy whether that be here or in the USA or even Belgium (Not likely though as his language skills are not good). But in the meantime we take one day at a time and try to get settled so that what ever he does he knows that he can come back here.
Good luck to everyone going through this, we have dealt with it by being honest with our son at all times. We have explained why he can't stay, money etc and have had the support of family (up to the point of actually offering to let him stay with them while he finishes school).
All the best.
Nicky

NickyP

A good idea as I know that Sam would have liked to speak to other kids in the same boat especially before the move.
Nicky

Luke I Amyofath

thanks Nicky however, for various reasons the admins have said no. I just thought it would have been nice for kids to have their very own forum where we keep out and also they have no reason to browse the other forums......

http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=335727

NickyP

I guessed that would be the reply shame really! Thanks for the try though.
Nicky

Margaret2

Have read this and can fully understand and agree with the admins on the site, however there is a kidz for oz thread, which I have read, but it seems that younger children are usuing it and not the madcap teens, they are, of course, too busy with friends, or mine is, that and msn

Thanks to everyone for all the replies

Margaret2

This is what I was thinking. As my daughter tries so hard at school, she puts 100% into her work and although she is not a great academic she tries so hard she gets there. But my hubby is dead against it, saying it will make matters worse and gives his reasons, and I can appreciate his reasons, they do make sense, oh god it's all so difficult

Pauline

I have a 14yr old daughter who definatley does want to go, but I do know that whatever worries your daughter has, had,or having it is normal. We have all been there done that. What exactly is she worried about?
We are going to Perth not quite sure where yet. We had a look around for 3 wks and it also took over 2 yrs for us to be accepted. But if you want to PM me with her concerns I am sure my daughter will try to help.

pauline