djdutts

It's wierd that with only 6 weeks or so left before we go, how much your views start changing on friends/family!

Now we're in this situation, it seems that I would move mountains for them. People asking me if I fancied a quick drink - before (if I really couldn't be bothered) I would have said "Nah, maybe later in the week", or something like that.

Now, it's "Yep, see you in a sec!"

I've also started looking at family from a different point of view. Every opportunity I get to see them, I will. Sounds strange really but I suppose it's to be expected.

Also, one bit of advice we had whilst at the exhibition was not to say goodbye at the airport. Book into a nice hotel the night before the flight, say your "See You Soon's" then. Don't say goodbye at the airport. Makes sense really. (Plus you'll be even more emotional on the flight!)

Oh well, just my views.........

Does anyone agree with me? Can anyone offer my guidance/words of encouragement?

Ta

sj oldfield

Hi there,
Quite agree with your post. I insisted I saw my mum and dad every day on the build up to us going. Even if it was only for an hour, just to sit there with them. Sorry to say, but you might find it gets a bit harder before it gets easier.
I remember very clerly as that plane roared down the runway......the tears just poured down my face.
It will get better though, just be strong, and if you find yourself on a downer put a post on the site and we will try and cheer you up.
All the very best to you

Nikki

Hi

I have an application going through, so not there yet. But a couple of thoughts on this. My Dad is in Oz and Airport goodbyes are draining. When I left him last year on the other side, Both myself and 10 year old son cried literally from Sydney to Singapore.

On our first trip my in-laws and my mum came to the airport and cried when we went through passport control, (we were only going for 3 weeks!). This upset me and the children.

Our next holiday we had drinks at the house the night before, more tears, this time 4 week holiday! But in the morning we left for our holiday like any normal family. We did not have to hide our excitement.

I think if the big day comes for us, I will definately choose this route, as you can cry all night and start the first day of your new life fresh, although the tears and emotion will still be there I would imagine.

I am not sure we could keep my Mum away from the airport, even it it was our wish. She would want any last moments with her only grandchildren and can you deny grandparents of that.

It is a tricky one and I feel sick just thinking of it.

Good luck with whatever you decide and your new life which will be fantastic!

Nikki

JackTheLad

We were all prepared for the emotional goodbyes at the airport. Mum and Dad were driving me and Mrs JTL in the morning. When we got to the airport, they just drove into the 'setdown' area, and let us out. We were stunned, they weren't coming into the airport with us! No emotional goodbyes or hugs or anything. Didn't even help with the luggage. Once we'd got it out of the car, they just waved and drove off!

As it turned out, it was my Mums idea, she hates goodbyes as well, so the quick getaway left us too stunned to feel emotional. I think I spent the whole flight over thinking, 'what the hell was that about?'. Then we got here, and I called her and she told me it was her plan.

I laugh now I suppose its one way of doing things: do the goodbyes the night before, and be business-like the next morning. But at least tell everyone thats the plan!!!

Cheers,
JTL

threlly

hi again,
yes, i know just how u feel. we go in just 6 weeks and there are so many people to see b4 we go. the worst thing is that our family and friends are all scattered around the uk, so it is also very tiring driving around. i have finished work though, so that is helping. i have just had my mum up for a long weekend and on good friday my sister and her husband are calling in to drop of their 2 boys (one 7 and one 10) and they are staying with us for 5 days while their parents go away. i am really looking forward to having quality time with my 2 nephews, looking forward to spoiling them like mad.

the airport matter-well, i have not finally decided on whether to say goodbye at the airport or say goodbye the day b4. my bf parents live near manchester airport so we will stay with them the night b4. bf parents do not want to come to the airport as it will be too much for them. my family all want to come but i am starting to think it will probably be best to say goodbye the day b4.

i am still deciding on what to do.
enjoy your remaining few weeks
cheers and c u in dee why

Pollyana

My family and I actually had a meal together in one terminal, and said farewell there, before I flew out of another. Worked OK, because my sister wanted to see me on my last day, but none of us had to go through the stress of waving goodbye through Passport Control. I just said goodbye in the shopping area, and they walked off to the car.
Emotional, but better than that awful disappearing act to "Airside".

Only trouble is my youngest niece, who was three at the time, now thinks that Heathrow IS Australia, as she knows I've come to Aus, and she remembers last seeing me over a pizza! She stunned my sister by asking "can we go to Australia this week and have pizza again with Aunty Polly?" Took Sis a while to work out what she was on about

artep

Oh bless her!!!!!!!!!!!!




We're doing the cheerio bits this weekend..

I really hope my parents don't suddenly decide they're going to do the 5 hour journey to the airport to wave us off... I really DON'T want anybody there to wave to as we're going through passport control....and I think I'll switch my mobile off too as I don't want any teary last minute calls either. I feel we'll have enough to think about without having to deal with emotionally charged relatives.

I don't think i'll be seeing my brother at all before I go. He lives just 2 hours away from me but we've never really got on. We exchange 'small talk' and we argue.....thats about it. When I texted him (he moved and didn't give me his new home ph no.) about meeting up before we go, he didn't reply so I ended up phoning him to see if we could arrange something. Bearing in mind our time is really tight...I suggested 2 times for a meet...both times weren't convenient for him...so I've left it up to him now....if he wants to see me...he knows how to get hold of me....

Pollyana

Same with my brother - if he can't make time, tough.

And I will admit - though I allowed my Sis, brother-in-law, and the kids, to come to Heathrow, it was kept quiet from my mum and dad till afterwards. Sis and I knew we could cope,parents would have been in pieces, so no-one told them till later, and then they were actually relieved that they hadn't been put through the ordeal. The kids didn't even know until they were in the car on the M4 They loved the whole experience though, riding on the trolley with my luggage, and proudly telling anyone who would listen "Our Auntie is going to live in Australia"

Remember Petra, you're doing this for you. You decide what you can deal with, and just ask them to respect that.

djdutts

Hi all

I totally agree (especially pollyanna's last comment).

I reckon though, it's a no-show at the airport. Don't say "goodbye's", but say "See you later's". And also, do it the day before and not on the actual day. We'll probably do the adios bit the day before and spend a nice relaxing night at the hotel. Don't want to be all upset on the plane having just said goodbye!

(Although you've got to say "See you later"! Apparantly this works better!)

This could well be possibly the best way (I hope!)

webgum

Hi everyone. Well, we leave in three weeks, and following advice on here, and also remembering other traumatic airport goodbyes, we are staying in a hotel the night before and flying out with good byes done a couple of days before. When I told my mum, she tried very hard to cover up her feelings of not being allowed to come to the airport and it took a good deal of explaining of how traumatic it would be for her to (vaguely) understand. It made it a bit easier as she assumed we would be flying out of Heathrow, when actually we are leaving from Manchester.

God, I have done too many appalling goodbyes (and hellos) for that matter at airports to even consider doing it again. My hubby and I met in Oz and had a good few years of hysterical (me) and damped eyed stoicism (him) before we settled here in Blighty. He gave up his residency to be here with me (aaaarh!) and only now do we get the chance to go back together.

My only problem with having the big physical goodbyes a couple of days before we go is that we will be speaking to them afterwards on the phone. What will that be like I wonder?

Brissiegirl

I'm dreading the airport bit... My Hubby's folks are insisting on taking us on the 5 hr journey to London, we all then stay at my lovely sis-in-laws for a night, and then we get dropped to Heathrow the next afternoon by the parents-in-law..

I am pushing (gently) that we get a taxi, take the tube or get my brother-in-law to drop us off himself, to Heathrow, as I know my Mother-in-law will be in tears!! I don't want to be cut-up before the flight or for my Hubby to be traumatised by the good-bye's bit... dreading it

JackTheLad

Do the goodbyes the night before, and tell them the next day is a formal business, drive to the airport, drop off in the set down zone. Get all their emotions out the night before, then you can concentrate on the flight.

Cheers,
JTL

djdutts

Totally agree!

Goodbye's the night before - airport is NOT the place to be doing such matters! :scared:

Anastasia Beaverhausen

I hate posts like this. Not because people shouldnt express there emotions, but because it reminds me of the one thing about emigrating that I am really not looking forward to.

I have already told my folks I would prefer it if they didnt come to the airport, and hopefully they will respect my wishes, but who I am to tell them they cant wave their little girl off (again) and hug their grandson to bits.

To everyone about to wave goodbye to there loved ones, I hope it all goes well, and get a very large box of tissues ready, better yet, sponge implants under your eyes!

Claire
xx

djdutts

Here's a thought to consider......

I saw my mum tonight and she was mentioning about how far it is away.

I simply said - "Mum, if you leave on a Tuesday, we'll see you on Wednesday!". It's only a day away!

I said "You can phone me from the airport before you get on the plane and tell me what you want for dinner tomorrow night".

The other side of the world - Yes. Far away? No.