[sunflwrgrl13]

Originally Posted by exvj They don't get it - they take everything literally I bet they only laugh at Python because everyone else is laughing Actually that was a line out of 'as good as it gets' Nicholson calls the cafe owner a pr*** and then says 'but I don't judge' Its hilarious and most of America must be able to get it or it wouldnt be good box office So I used it here after an OBVIOUS to everyone all over the world, frivolous tongue in cheek observation and they all say 'but you do judge' oh dear... no wonder they can't sell yorkie bars here

Maybe you just need to accept that there are certain aspects of a British sense of humor that do not translate well. So instead of jumping on the conclusion that we must all be humorless idiots that just don't get it, maybe you should stop and think how the written word on a forum differs from real life conversation. Nothing in your post suggested to me any kind humor. You just came across as a pr**k.

[exvj]

Originally Posted by sunflwrgrl13 Maybe you just need to accept that there are certain aspects of a British sense of humor that do not translate well. So instead of jumping on the conclusion that we must all be humorless idiots that just don't get it, maybe you should stop and think how the written word on a forum differs from real life conversation. Nothing in your post suggested to me any kind humor. You just came across as a pr**k.

I will take that as an example of how you think humour should be done and how members should address each other

If I referred to the corresponding female organ in describing you, I think it would be particularly apt; but it's something I would never do because I have more class

[sunflwrgrl13]

Originally Posted by exvj I will take that as an example of how you think humour should be done and how members should address each other If I referred to the corresponding female organ in describing you, I think it would be particularly apt; but it's something I would never do because I have more class

Oh, please do share. Honey, there's nothing you could possibly say that would offend me. Besides, I didn't call you a pr**k. I said you came across as one in that particular post. Big difference IMO.

But, my personal comment aside, I guess you didn't get the point of my post, did you?

[Kaffy Mintcake]

Originally Posted by cindyabs My experience in eating out in the UK other than pubs, the prices dictate the dress, even if the ambiance isn't stellar. I mean, in the US if I'm going to grab something at Cracker Barrel or Waffle House I'm not going to get gussied up. If I'm going to Ruth's Chris, of course I would dress smarter.

That's true, this shock can happen the other way too. We bought our current house from a couple where the wife was American and the husband was British. They invited us over for dinner at their (soon to be our) house while we were waiting to close. We dressed up to what I would categorize as business casual and brought a bottle of wine. Imagine my shock when I rang the doorbell (we were expected) and the wife answered looking a bit sweaty, wearing shorts and a t-shirt. In fact, she looked like she'd been working in the hard. The husband came back from wherever he'd been shortly after we arrived and hopped into the shower before joining us in jeans, etc. We felt a bit uncomfortable to say the least with our bottle of wine and nicer clothes.

It may be that people just have different expectations perhaps. Not sure ...

[Zonie]

Originally Posted by Rete My only exception would to not ask for a doggie bag at a white glove establishment. Although I would love to do it one day just for the shock appeal.

Yes I think the surgeons and nurses would be shocked!

[Ash UK/US]

Originally Posted by ukintexas This is too funny - we should do a poll on this one to see how many people experience this

My inlaws have our girls this weekend as it is our 7th wedding anniversary, one thing that I notice is we are alone yet we spend a lot of time talking about the kids

[Ash UK/US]

Originally Posted by exvj When I see people asking for doggy bags, I think what a set of peasants, they must have no food at home...why don't they stay in and buy some food instead of wasting what little money they have in a restaurant I don't judge though

You made yourself sound like a right idiot with that line!

[exvj]

Originally Posted by sunflwrgrl13 Oh, please do share. Honey, there's nothing you could possibly say that would offend me. Besides, I didn't call you a pr**k. I said you came across as one in that particular post. Big difference IMO. But, my personal comment aside, I guess you didn't get the point of my post, did you?

Yes, I got the point - I am a British expat and I posted on a British expat site using British style and some British humour hoping to have a pleasant bit of ribaldry in the British style with others of my background. For doing that, I am ragged up and told off by by American women and not for the first time. I posted for page after page quite happily until...


Shouldn't it be the case, that American women entering a British expats site, are prepared to encounter the Brits in their own play pen without insisting that they conform to American sensibilities and use American humour (and spelling)? Is it right for the Brits to be told by American women who have entered a British expats site, that they sound like 'pr*cks ?'


What kind of person would I be if I cruised the Americans in Britain expat site (there is one that my wife used while living there) and gave them a rocket for noting the things that seemed strange and weird and non sensical to them in the UK. I wouldn't do that because doing that I would give those Americans a sour view of Brits and anyway I think ex pat Americans should be allowed to find their feet without being attacked for 'Criticising Britain'. But that is exactly what you American women are doing on here.

Please allow Brits to talk about the (to them ) strange, weird, seemingly non sensical things they encounter in the US without slapping them down and telling them they are not allowed to 'criticise' and must internalise all these new experiences with no outlet or forum to compare and discuss it with other ex pat Brits and understanding Americans.

Doggy bags are not the norm in the UK and do sometimes get a snigger when a rich aunt takes some plate scrapings home. I don't see why after saying that, I should be treated to such aggression and derision and be told I sound like a pr*ck.

Good American humour is my favorite and even better than the best British humour on occasions. 'As good as it gets' the line from which I quoted and which caused such offence to 'some', is among the best along with 'The man with two brains' and 'married with children' etc etc etc - It's sophisticated and nuanced and clever and the opposite of what certain characters use on me on this site.

Perhaps what I am coming up against is, not British versus American humour, but jocular versus sour, bitter, fustrated, aggressive, bored, unempowered and looking for anonymous redress against people who appear happy, self assured and outgoing - the playing out of accumulated resentments that existed long before I came along. (Add to that dull witted who don't 'get it' ).There is a lot of stuff on the net about people using oscenities and extreme aggression online that they wouldn't dream of using 'face to face'


The full quote: from Jack Nicholson was:
'I am not a pr*ck. You are, but I dont judge'.
I used the ' I don't judge' part of that quote after an unashamedly judgemental but gentle tongue in cheek post and they all go - 'oh but you do judge' and 'how dare you critizice America !'

I think thats funny - you don't - no accounting for taste - end of story

...back to the thread

[cindyabs]

Alan,
I am one of the "they" you mention, one of the American women that you have labeled as "sour, bitter, fustrated, aggressive, bored, and unempowered." Guess what, that is not nationality specific or even gender specific on here.

Anyway, I don't much care for your generalization and I think you went way over the line, yet again. It seems to be a pattern. We go along just fine, trading posts and observations, and then you insert some little snide zinger is and wham. Then you sit there and say "what?", "what did I do, I only said".........and then you paraphrase Nixon with the old well you won't have me to kick around anymore." Then you pop up again, in a few weeks or a few months, whatever.

I don't give a rat's ass whether you do doggie bags or not, nor should it matter to you whether I do or not. I think we have pointed out that there are a few Brits, my own dear DH included, who could make speed eating an Olympic event.

Btw, it wasn't just Americans that thought you were getting a bit overboard, and yet YOU singled US out.

Why?

If you're going to be a truth teller Alan, tell all of the truth.

[exvj]

Originally Posted by cindyabs Alan, I am one of the "they" you mention, one of the American women that you have labeled as "sour, bitter, fustrated, aggressive, bored, and unempowered." Guess what, that is not nationality specific or even gender specific on here. Anyway, I don't much care for your generalization and I think you went way over the line, yet again. It seems to be a pattern. We go along just fine, trading posts and observations, and then you insert some little snide zinger is and wham. Then you sit there and say "what?", "what did I do, I only said".........and then you paraphrase Nixon with the old well you won't have me to kick around anymore." Then you pop up again, in a few weeks or a few months, whatever. I don't give a rat's ass whether you do doggie bags or not, nor should it matter to you whether I do or not. I think we have pointed out that there are a few Brits, my own dear DH included, who could make speed eating an Olympic event. Btw, it wasn't just Americans that thought you were getting a bit overboard, and yet YOU singled US out. Why? If you're going to be a truth teller Alan, tell all of the truth.

Cindy - I was reading this and waiting for you to really stick it to me and you didn't. I see that as movement towards serenity and understanding. Research shows that I am not the first Yorkshireman to be attributed with being opinionated and stark and a generaliser and I am sure the rest of the Brits are giggling at that coz we are known for it. We didnt get known as England's Texas for nothing. In our culture, those are considered highly enviable attributes, attainments even, whereas in the US its all 'have a nice day' and 'you are a very special person, thank you for visiting us today' before the welcoming smile slowly fades into a gray sneer ... We think our way is better but it's each to his own.

I only cry foul when the poster gets obscene. Ladies who take home half of a $50 meal and think it's worth $25 are entitled to their different opinion.
I think a $50 meal is $10 food plus $40 ambiance and they are taking home $5 and that's when it's sizzling hot. That's just exchanging different opinions and it's not the starting gun for cyber war.

Now I have whetted your appetite for the Viking culture of Yorkshire, I offer you this explantory video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VLYpKGVBUg

[AmerLisa]

Originally Posted by cindyabs Alan is "sour, bitter, fustrated, aggressive, bored, and unempowered." If you're going to be a truth teller

More like pot stirrer..... And I think he hit the nail on the head for adjectives above, but he forgot to insert his own name....

[exvj]

Originally Posted by AmerLisa More like pot stirrer..... And I think he hit the nail on the head for adjectives above, but he forgot to insert his own name....

You are entitled to think and post that, but you are not entitled to doctor Cindy's quotes...
No doubt she will let you know on that score...

[Jerseygirl]

Originally Posted by exvj Cindy - I was reading this and waiting for you to really stick it to me and you didn't. I see that as movement towards serenity and understanding. Research shows that I am not the first Yorkshireman to be attributed with being opinionated and stark and a generaliser and I am sure the rest of the Brits are giggling at that coz we are known for it. We didnt get known as England's Texas for nothing. In our culture, those are considered highly enviable attributes, attainments even, whereas in the US its all 'have a nice day' and 'you are a very special person, thank you for visiting us today' before the welcoming smile slowly fades into a gray sneer ... We think our way is better but it's each to his own. I only cry foul when the poster gets obscene. Ladies who take home half of a $50 meal and think it's worth $25 are entitled to their different opinion. I think a $50 meal is $10 food plus $40 ambiance and they are taking home $5 and that's when it's sizzling hot. That's just exchanging different opinions and it's not the starting gun for cyber war. Now I have whetted your appetite for the Viking culture of Yorkshire, I offer you this explantory video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VLYpKGVBUg

Did you read the same post as me?....because I thought Cindy really and truly stuck it to you.

[AmerLisa]

Originally Posted by exvj You are entitled to think and post that, but you are not entitled to doctor Cindy's quotes... No doubt she will let you know on that score...

In a public forum I'm sure that I can do as I please..... But, I wholeheartedly agree with Cindy, I just added a bit more.....

[Sally Redux]

Originally Posted by Jerseygirl Did you read the same post as me?....because I thought Cindy really and truly stuck it to you.

A touch of the 'David Brents'