Si, Señor, der dago ... (but shouldn't it be lorries?)

Kind-of at a tangient to the thread

OK, so I know my artwork is carp, but something I just cobbled together in Micro$oft paint isn't ever going to match photoshop and the likes.

Anyway, I hope it does as intended

Reminds me of an "incident" when I was (in my youth) selling encyclopaedias to US forces in the various barracks all over southern Germany

A very serious young officer decked out in spotless parade uniform took me aside and said with a broad southern (Georgia) accent, conjuring up a stately home bedecked with Spanish moss, "You're English are you not? "Yes, I answered" "Well, he said, "I have an embarassing question. I'm very keen on an English girl I met in town, and, after a very pleasant evening (yes he talked like that!) together, I asked her if I could see her again." "OK," I said "What's the problem?".

"Well", he said, moving closer and speaking almost in a whisper, "She said to me "OK, no problem, you can come and knock me up any time! Now I find that really shocking as we don't talk that way in my family circle. Do you think she's the type of girl a man in my position could get involved with?"

(I stiffled a LOL with difficulty!)

"Don't worry", I said, " In England that means only that she gives you permission to knock at her door any time to invite her."

"Oh, my", said he, "You may know that in the States where I come from (meaning Deep Southern Gentleman land), such words are (moving closer and whispering again) regarded as an open invitation to have a overt sexual relationship. I'm so relieved you've explained that it's not so with this fine young lady"

"That's OK", said I, "Happy to be of service in explaining a slight difference in language usage between American English and English English. You can put your mind at rest." (He was the kind of guy that inspired that kind of answer!)

PS, the above happened in 1959 - probably wouldn't happen today!!

Oh yeah, and if your friend from USA was looking a bit depressed about the situation, I hope you didn't advise him to "keep your pecker up"









No wonder we Brits got a reputation

USA & pecker - now that reminds me.......
On one of my first working trips to the States, I was in the general office one morning and had just scribbled (in pencil) a quick sketch which would eventually serve as a machine tool - but then I wanted to make a rapid change - so went across to one of the many secretaries that happened to be in the same area - and politely and boldly asked, "Excuse me, could you lend me a rubber". A loud gasping of breath was suddenly heard, followed by a look of utter disbelief and amazement from her and from female colleagues close by!
I was obviously the first Brit to have given them such a laugh, and they never let me forget it, or that I should have requested an eraser!

Yeah, like - "Can you give me a lift in your elevator?"
Well, that's better than saying to a British girl
"Can I elevate you in my lift?"

"Translate" this short sentence in English English and US English
into equivalent meanings in both "languages":

I'm really mad about my flat

I'm really mad about my flat

I'm really overjoyed about my apartment?

I'm really furious about my puncture?


Brit: Where's the oil filler?
US guy: Under the hood
Brit: No, a hood is worn over the head, don't you mean under the bonnet?
US Dude: no a bonnet is headwear for women, try in the trunk
Brit: but a trunk is part of an elephant, do you mean in the boot?
US Dude: no, a boot is what I'm wearing on my foot . . .
and so it goes on . . .

Then we get really confused. US dude will refer to the fender on the car, but we Brits would say that's a bumper . . . except when its a bumper on a boat, in which case, we will call it a fender.

Oh, I give up!!

One of my all time film favourite scenes is from the uber macho 'Stagecoach' starring John Wayne as the Ringo Kid.

In one scene Ringo is asked by the Marshall to help getting the stagecoach across a flooded stream:

'Ringo, just take your suspenders off and give us a hand with this dam' coach willya?'

Bliss

Classic!
I bet that flooded stream made his mascara run........

Not 100% in line with this thread, but I do have this memory from an old film starring Alan Ladd.

The Man walks macho-like into a bar on a wharf in San Francisco
and goes straight to an attractive women sitting with a raised glass.
"Say Maam, can I drive you home??"
The woman turns and slowly appraises "the Man" from head to foot.
"You have a car bud??"
He, in turn, slowly and lasciviously appraises her from head to toe.
"No Maam, a whip!"

Whilst on holiday with Club med in Portugal, they had on the food display the information tags,

'Cock stewed in red wine'
&
Octopussy salad

'I tried both, tasty too'




Going back next year to see what else they have.