Teaandtoday5

Some of the most miserable times of my life were when my children were In pre-school groups. The phrase 'mother and toddler' is synonymous with hell to me. When they finally got too old for them I mentioned my relief to one acquaintance, who totally agreed. I look back now, and wonder what the hell I was thinking. If I didn't go I felt like I was failing my children but I hated every second of every group for 8 years, until all three were too old for them. I realise there is more to your problem than kids groups, but seriously quit. I wish I had.

Moses2013

I can't comment on all of Northern Ireland but Galway you were considering is so multicultural and the majority of people aren't bothered if somebody is Irish, European, African, Asian etc.


Even if you were the only foreigner in a village doesn't mean you won't be accepted and sometimes people even show more interest if someone looks different than others and integrates. Things have changed and no doubt there are issues with the migrant crisis, religion but scumbags will always find a reason to hate somebody.




If you go to rough areas, somebody would probably be worse off with a football jersey from a club they don't like. Regardles of skin colour, there are always places to avoid in every country and as long as youavoid certain places it's fine.

Editha

If you read the thread you will work it out.

TrishP

I have one child and we live in the arsehole of nowhere - unless I make the effort on his behalf, he's stuck looking at me day in and day out, so not going isn't really an option, unfortunately. The one saving grace is Friday playgroup, as there's a merry band of 4 Brits who club together in one corner to laugh at all the helicopter parents!

Pulaski

It's not surprising that you find Canada a very lonely country to live in and you're never going to be accepted if your efforts to fit in are tipified by banding together with other Brits to laugh at all the helicopter parents!

TrishP

It's only in the past year that I have made friends with any British people in Canada and it's more been out of desperation as Canadians have tended to be so shallow and fair weather. So, no, I haven't 'stuck with my own' over the past 11 years, but have made many and repeated efforts to make friends, but there is an insurmountable wall with Canadians if you 're of the type to make real friends and not just a bunch of acquaintances.

Editha

Helicopter parent is a term usually used of the parents of a teen or college aged young person, who takes an excessive interest in their welfare.

I don't think it is possible to be the helicopter parent of a pre-school.

Novocastrian

You'd be surprised. It's perfectly possible and even common these days. As it was 30 odd years ago in Toronto.

BristolUK

I had to look it up as I'd never heard of it. I read lots of definitions applying to a child of any age. Although there were some mentions of it primarily applying to older kids, even those said it could still be any age.

I'm still learning things

TrishP

They're perfectly easy to spot in a pre-school environment, interfering in their kids' choice of toys, how they play with them, their interactions with other kids, forcing them to "share darling" (when they aren't developmentally ready for it). I was a paediatric therapist in a previous life, so can spot the difference between parents who facilitate and those who take over!

Teaandtoday5

As a bit of a control freak I can sympathise with the temptation to 'hover'. 'Performance parenting' however, does my head in.

TrishP

What really does my head in is the feminising of boys' behaviour here ... it's generally frowned upon when wee boys run and around and basically act like wee boys, rather than sit quietly at tables doing crafts.

feelbritish

Just want to add my support here for you. Having also experienced the loneliness in Canada, on Vancouver Island for 12 years (first 3 years were ok as it was new and exciting) plus the shallowness, no sense of humour and not fitting in, I eventually pursuaded my British OH to retire back here. We had no children to worry about or to make friends with parents. We seemed to be accepted as "foreigners" but it was all on the surface. Funnily enough as me being from South Africa originally I was more accepted than my Brit OH who was always being ripped off for his Britishness. I feel far more at home here than I ever did in Canada and dont miss it at all! I don't think you will experience racism here especially in SE as Britain is pretty multicultural. As a Canadian here I think he would be well accepted, more than you are over there! BTW the feeling of loneliness never left me and I believe no matter where you move to it will not change. Canada has a good image outside to the world but it is very different from within. As has been said before this is the place to vent! Wishing you well.

Benson55

I live in Canada and agree with you. I am moving back to the UK in a few years when I can sell this business I own.
Canada has changed a lot for the worse, there is more people but more culture in the UK.

Editha

I don't know what posters mean when they write that the UK has 'more culture'. All societies have a culture, and I don't see how one can have more than another.