Originally Posted by ldyinlv

Go home, you wwill work yurself to death here..you kids will adapt, kids always do...America can be a very lonely place..
Jackie.

Originally Posted by Celtic_Angel

your post and the one you are responding to have definitely struck a cord with me! when I look into my future I see exactly the same thing for myself...adult kids who don't join me and medical bills! I've been feeling like this on and off for lets say 5 + years ...it's what motivated me to get my U.s citizenship but then another baby happened and before you know it 5 years have passed and you still feel the same ..no, more desperate because you're not getting any younger and the oldest kid should have already begun his GCSE's ......I'm lonely and unhappy here but to uproot the kids?..make us broke moving to rain and shoe box terraces?

when I'm second guessing myself , realising the cost of the whole thing or just feeling generally overwhelmed and scared by the whole prospect of returning to a country I left when I was 20.....I'm gonna reread your post and it's gonna give me the courage to finally make this thing happen!

good luck to you both and I hope like hell this is the right decision ..wouldn't life be much simpler with a crystal ball...better yet a winning lottery ticket
...oh and p.s .............if it all goes tits up for me when I do return ...I'll blame you

Originally Posted by lolpeake103

Hello All,
Well my story is I have been living in the USA for 20 years now, I came here as an impressionable 19 year old as an aupair, met a guy, we got married....divorced.....met someone new, had 3 kids.....divorced.....!!!
I have been a single parent now for 3 years and im finding it increasingly difficult to try to do this on my own. My exs family dont help out at all, my ex barely pays child support, I work 2 jobs just to keep afloat and have come to a fork in the road....do I stay here for my kids or do I leave to go back to England?
I feel I dont really have friends here, most of them left with my divorce, I work 7 days a week and my oldest daughter who is 12 seems to be stuck with the majority of the parenting responsibilities, im so unsure as to what to do, I have spent half of my life here but feel I have achieved very little. I love the area where I live as there is a freshwater lake less than 5 minutes away and I love the water, but im just feeling so incredibly depressed and I just dont know what to do. My family wants me home....yesterday!!! Im worried about my kids, how will they cope? Im worried about myself, I would go back home, to the west midlands, not the most scenic of counties....I feel my life is just a sham though, I honestly dont know what to do for the best. I have a 3 week vacation set up for December/January, my kids will have their first English christmas!! Im going to use that time to see how they like it. I know if I move home I will not be able to come back to the USA so its a 1 time deal.......I just dont know what is the best decision to make for me or my kids.......any ideas anyone??

Thanks for listening!!!

Originally Posted by Sally Redux

we lived in the West Midlands for 11 years and I think you could do a lot worse.

Originally Posted by lolpeake103

Thankyou all for your replies....

Sue, thankyou for moving my post for me. I have been a greencard holder for 17 years now but was under the impression I am only allowed out of the USA for upto 1 year before forfeiting that, my children are all US citizens so I dont know if that factors into anything, I honestly wish I had the finances to stay longer...maybe 3 months, so the kids could really get a taste for the life but as im absolutely stripped of resources it would have to be a 1 time thing, I wouldnt be able to set up home here again by myself, It has taken me 3 years to get this far with a trailer, a car and 2 jobs......and even my modest life is a constant struggle....

Robin, my children have been there quite a few times, my son was born there so sees himself as very much English, he would move in a heartbeat, my youngest is 7 and is very happy go lucky, I think she would adjust wonderfully.....but my oldest is 12 and has had to grow up VERY fast these past few years, although she is excited to go for a visit.....and she actually has told me she would love to go to college in the UK, I think she is the one im most concerned with......she is basically the only one that has any sort of a relationship with her Dad....

Mummy, I toyed with the idea of going home after the divorce, and my ex had no problem with it. He will go months without seeing or talking to his children, and just like you said......he told me it would be a weight off his shoulders as he wouldnt have to pay child support ( not that me staying here made that happen but something is better than nothing I guess) I think he would happily give up his rights to write off his financial responsibility.....

Thankyou all for your comments and questions, my head is spinning and in my heart I just dont know what to do. I appreciate your input so much!