Crap jokes
Jan 26th 2007, 10:51 pm
#33
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Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Where the sun always shines
Posts: 3,627
Re: Crap jokes
well also told these today on the oz forum here goes
bucket of pee went to the bar barman said not serving you, you are steaming
pair of eyes goes to the bar barman says not serving you you are out of your face
hair goes to the bar barman says not serving you your off your head
piece of string goes to the bar barman says not serving you your a piece of string, string walks away comes back and says pint please, barman says told you not serving you your a piece of string, string replies im AFFRIAD KNOT ha ha ha well i laugh at them anyway even if you dont think they are funny i BET you will still tell em
bucket of pee went to the bar barman said not serving you, you are steaming
pair of eyes goes to the bar barman says not serving you you are out of your face
hair goes to the bar barman says not serving you your off your head
piece of string goes to the bar barman says not serving you your a piece of string, string walks away comes back and says pint please, barman says told you not serving you your a piece of string, string replies im AFFRIAD KNOT ha ha ha well i laugh at them anyway even if you dont think they are funny i BET you will still tell em
Jan 26th 2007, 11:01 pm
#34
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Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Sherwood Park
Posts: 1,709
Re: Crap jokes
How do you make a snooker table laugh...
put your hands in it's pockets and tickle it's balls!!!!
How do you catch a squirrel.....hang from a tree and act like a nut!!!
What's the difference between a post box and an elephants arse.........
I'm not sending you to post my letters !
Horse walks into a bar......barman says. " why the long face? "
put your hands in it's pockets and tickle it's balls!!!!
How do you catch a squirrel.....hang from a tree and act like a nut!!!
What's the difference between a post box and an elephants arse.........
I'm not sending you to post my letters !
Horse walks into a bar......barman says. " why the long face? "
Jan 26th 2007, 11:06 pm
#35
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Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Sherwood Park
Posts: 1,709
Re: Crap jokes
What do you call 2 sheep tied to a post?
A leisure comlpex !!!!!
Man drives past a field and see's a man stood behind a sheep...
"are you shearing sheep?" the man shouts....
The man behind the sheep replies ......." bugger off and get your own "
Jan 26th 2007, 11:36 pm
#37
Just Joined
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 21
Re: Crap jokes
Well I guess that confirms it - I am just thick!
Jan 26th 2007, 11:39 pm
#38
Just Joined
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 21
Re: Crap jokes
Man walks into the dentist and says
"Please help me, I feel like a moth"
Dentist says "Well why come in here? Shouldn't you have gone to the doctors"
Man says "Sorry, I saw the light on!"
"Please help me, I feel like a moth"
Dentist says "Well why come in here? Shouldn't you have gone to the doctors"
Man says "Sorry, I saw the light on!"
Jan 27th 2007, 8:08 am
#39
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,554
Re: Crap jokes
What do you call a man standing in a pile of leaves? - Russell
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? - Cliff
What do you call a sheep with no legs? - cloud
What do you call a deer with no eyes? - No eyedeer
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? - still no eyedeer
I could go on but the risk of getting kicked out is too high - why is it I only remember the bad ones?
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? - Cliff
What do you call a sheep with no legs? - cloud
What do you call a deer with no eyes? - No eyedeer
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? - still no eyedeer
I could go on but the risk of getting kicked out is too high - why is it I only remember the bad ones?
What do you call a man with 2 plates of glass on his head
"Paddy O Doors"
Jan 27th 2007, 8:13 am
#40
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 4,842
Re: Crap jokes
Ok, This is the explanation -
2 nuns (naked) in a bath, one of the nun's says "Where's the soap", the other nun who thinks she means "wear's the soap" as in the soap gets smaller as she rubs it on her v$"&^a, say's "yes it does doesn't it".
Get it now?
2 nuns (naked) in a bath, one of the nun's says "Where's the soap", the other nun who thinks she means "wear's the soap" as in the soap gets smaller as she rubs it on her v$"&^a, say's "yes it does doesn't it".
Get it now?
Jan 27th 2007, 8:13 am
#41
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,554
Re: Crap jokes
Mary had a little lamb, she tied it to a pylon
10,000 volts went up it's ass
and turned it's wool to nylon
Boom Boom
10,000 volts went up it's ass
and turned it's wool to nylon
Boom Boom
Jan 27th 2007, 11:56 am
#44
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 7,715
Re: Crap jokes
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet
her clothes all tattered and torn
it wasn't the spider
that sat down beside her
but Little Boy Blue and his horn
her clothes all tattered and torn
it wasn't the spider
that sat down beside her
but Little Boy Blue and his horn
Jan 27th 2007, 3:20 pm
#45
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Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Sherwood Park
Posts: 1,709
Re: Crap jokes
Little Jack Horner
sat in the corner
with a dirty look in his eyes
he never looked at the pretty girls
but, he smiled when the boys went by...
sat in the corner
with a dirty look in his eyes
he never looked at the pretty girls
but, he smiled when the boys went by...