Alan2005

Man goes into a doctors:

Doctor says, "Ok, I've got your test results. You've got to stop masturbating"

The man is now concerned - "Sounds bad, why?"

Doctor replies, "Because I'm trying to tell you them and it's very distracting."

Stinkypup

Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 HOURS! That's terrible!! WHAT could be WORSE? What's the very bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.





Do you think that there has been a slight thread drift?

BristolUK

Doctor doctor I've got a cricket ball stuck in my bottom
• How's that?
Oh, don't you start...

caretaker

We do it through home lotteries.
I went to the doctor, he said "Take off all your clothes, stand in front of the window and stick out your tongue."
I said "Why?" He said "I'm mad at my neighbour."
Henny Youngman

scrubbedexpat133

It was not meant as an attack on you but more the article and the situations that I and others have encountered re GPs here. I think that the Doctor in the article is a disgrace to the profession assuming that the article is correct. I would guess that the real reason that this has happened and for this policy is purely financial. If that was not the case and someone smearing him in the news and social media why not issue a statement?
I wont go into my experiences with the doctors in the walk in clinics here as they were unbelievably unprofessional. It seems here that GPs work part time and cant be arsed either way. The big problem in NB is the lack of GPs.

I found that the system used by my GP back home seemed to work very well in regard to balancing appointments vs drop ins and as such the Doctor was able to look after the patient long range and frequently as you say. I am sure that there are good and bad in the UK as well.

As far as the Daily Fail goes it could not be further from my choice of newspapers. I have very little patience for BS bureaucratic non answers though. I cant speak to BC but it is very much a theme in this province. NB is a will not province and its people has very little interest in doing any more than the bare minimum.

Alan2005

Man goes to doctors wearing nothing but c!ingfilm.
"Doctor I think I'm going crazy"
Doctor replies, "Yes, I can clearly see your nuts"

caretaker

Doctor says "You're crazy."
I said "I'd like a second opinion."
Doctor says "You're ugly."

Alan2005

A woman is 3 months pregnant and for joke reasons falls into a deep coma. 6 months later, she wakes up and asks the doctor about her baby.

Doctor: You had twins, a girl and a boy. Fortunately, your brother was there to name them for you.

Woman: Oh no, not my brother! He's an idiot! What did he name the girl?

Doctor: Denise.

Woman: Well, that isn't so bad. What did he name the boy?

Doctor: Denephew.

JonboyE

"Doctor, doctor, I feel like Tom Jones."

Doctor replies "It's not unusual."

caretaker

Psychiatrist: Your feelings of inadequacy and belief that people think you are unattractive are purely delusional, now if you'd just lie face down on the couch.....

Stinkypup

Obviously being local, I do know more about this than others. The reason why there has been no reply is that we are medico legally bound by confidentiality and cannot discuss ANY patient's issues and so the Dr cannot reply even if they really wanted to. We can get completely and unjustifiably slammed by a patient in the Rate.MD website, but we are unable to reply and say why we parted ways with the patient for instance, very frustrating as you only get one side of things. Again in this thread example you only have one side and so it is very difficult to give a reasoned and balanced opinion.

With regard to your suggestion of financial gain- money isn't the issue here. The Dr is not gaining or losing money by their action and so in this instance money doesn't enter into the discussion. If the patient repeatedly failed to attend appointments then yes, there would be financial loss to the Dr and the patient would likely after a warning, then a bill, be fired, not unreasonable IMO. Not so in this instance.

Re standards of WICs versus Office GPs, obviously both can be great, both can be awful but as you have encountered in NS as in BC, WIC Appts are often way too short, rushed, in, out and it often seems that the patient is just a little package of cash for the Dr- just my own personal opinion though!
I hope that that clarifies things a little.

Stinkypup

- Doc, is it true, that if I ate a lot of carrots, I won't need glasses?
- Sure, have you ever seen a rabbit with glasses?

BristolUK

That made me do a little research because I remember that most years Moncton comes out rather well in the Moneysense 'best places to live' every year and one of the main reasons is its rate of doctors per 1000 population. Slumped to 28th in the table last year I believe but out of 180 that's still not bad.

But city results are quite different to province results. One would expect differences between rural Ontario and Toronto for example.

Anyway, Moneysense routinely puts Moncton at around 3.2 doctors per 1000. and looking at other places that seems well ahead of an awful lot of cities.

Looking at rates province by province NB has 229 per 100,000 in 2014 with only 3 provinces (Newfoundland, Nova Scotia and Quebec) having a better rate.

That's pretty good for old 'have not' NB. In fact this part of Canada seems to be doing better than people think for doctors and even better for Moncton.

That isn't for you Alex, it's for certain others.

Alan2005

I heard that U2 once went there.

snoopdawg

Well if you call an average of 60 hours a week part time- yes we are lazy sods!!
Remember face to face visits are only part of what we do. One visit might generate up to an hour of work- phone calls, letters, investigations- all still work- sometimes very intense, complicated- often juggled whilst trying to see patients and not make mistakes. Then there are hospice, nursing home visits and occasional home visits plus dozens of incoming results/letters/faxes every day that must be dealt with accurately
We never know what we will deal with next and have to somehow switch from fighting back tears having told someone that you really like that they have cancer to trying not to get irritated because someone doesn't like a minuscule spider vein on their leg "because I can't wear shorts" and insists that MSP should pay!

On top of that 60 hours, we also have a business to run, staff to manage, bookkeeping, and so on. Light entertainment on the internet helps!!
I'm not complaining- I chose to do it but saying we all work part time is galling!!

Re this case- we can all assume what happened but we don't know ( it won't be financial!) but you were the one complaining of a 2 year wait for a GP!
So lets say you have a wife with diabetes and a child with heart issues.You are worried about them.
I'm happy to take on new people when I have space- it's nice meeting new people and gives new challenges. But I'm full:

I have several people whom I haven't seen for 2-3 years- I can see they regularly go to WICs sometimes to get meds that should be tightly controlled- they often don't respond to letters.
I also have people I haven't seen for 3/4/5 even 6 years ago- no record of WICs. A couple pitched up last summer- they had moved back to Alberta and wanted to see me when holidaying here.
Are you happy waiting longer just in case these people decide to see me after all??
We will all have them, they clog lists!
Who should have a GP- your "wife and child" who may attend regularly and need help or those who never come in but "might"!
We can't plan as Shard suggested earlier, for e.g. we have Februarys that are very quiet, and the next year we can't create enough availability and so on! It often makes no sense at all.