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Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

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Old Jun 26th 2009, 1:16 pm
  #16  
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

As much as it might scare him, you might want to go through the moving back to the UK threads on this site, and the homesickness and hard times thread on the US expats in the UK site.

http://talk.uk-yankee.com/index.php?board=68.0

You'll start to see patterns in how folks have difficulty adjusting. How one spouse is happy to be in their familiar surroundings and the other is sort of isolated, alone, not quite sure.

I would strongly advise talking through a few 'what ifs' with him. What if he hates it when he arrives (grin and bear it and go with the flow). What if he hates it after 6 months (keep trying?). What if he hates it after a year (go back home, with or without you???)

Or he might end up having the time of his life. It's best to be prepared for the worst and hope for the best.

Good luck with your trip.
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Old Jun 26th 2009, 1:48 pm
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Only bit of advice I can offer (I've been in the US for 20 years now) goes with the poster above. Keep your options completely open for a UK return. Bank accounts/house etc. and if you can possibly keep a potential job return go for it.
Some people love it here and as has been said, some feel as if they never belong so keep the doors open and you'll have choices.
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Old Jun 26th 2009, 2:14 pm
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Originally Posted by Burn1911
IMHO the hardest thing when we moved here, was making myself understood! I was so offended that no one knew what I was asking for when I was trying to find something in the store (notice I said store not shop!!)

It was accepting that people generally didn't understand me - I think people were just not expecting an accent and so genuinely were surprised and therefore didn't hear what I was saying.

However I remember going to Home Depot and asking where the "Tarps" were located (as in Tarpaulin) well the woman looked at me as if I had asked her why she was standing there naked!!! and I had to keep repeating the word, then describing what it was and then I said Tarpaulin - blank stare!!! and so I kept say Tarps, Tarps, Tarps (I must have sounded so funny) then it clicked and she said - oh you mean Tarps - WTF, she said it exactly as I had said it.

I really think she thought it was a trick!!!!!!! BUT I wanted to cry, it was so frustrating!!!

That was the hardest part for me, but now I just take it in my stride and mostly just spend hours in stores trying to find it myself
Yeah, he's experienced a few blank stares and "What???". He talks slower whenever we go back and know some of the lingo.

I couldn't help but laugh reading your post. When I first came here I experienced the exact same thing a number of times. I had only been here a few weeks when I was temping in a department store and a woman asked me if there were any prams in the store. Lets just say it took a lot of questions, hand gestures, repetition, and about 5 minutes to get on the same page. Still experience it even now because my accent is a weird mixture of NY and Northwest UK.

Thanks for your post.
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Old Jun 26th 2009, 2:16 pm
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Originally Posted by NC Penguin
Just wondering why you and your family are choosing to move to the US now? Do you or your husband have a job lined up?

I ask because the US is experiencing a tough recession and if at least one of you has a permanent job in the UK right now, if I were you, I'd stay put in the UK for now.

That's my 5 cents.
We aren't moving now. It's a few years away yet. I appreciate everyones 5 cents.
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Old Jun 26th 2009, 2:23 pm
  #20  
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Originally Posted by cathy22w
Totally love Bill Bryson. Loved the part about the taxes, too. lol

Here's another thing to avoid - drive thrus! I have learned to hate them in my time here. It gets really frustrating to have to keep repeating yourself and still not ending up with exactly what you asked for!

And Eastern PA is not such a bad place. I am in Scranton, and it's fairly central to a lot of places. 2 hrs to NY, 2 hrs to Philly etc etc.
Bill Bryson is awesome! We have all his books and both love him. Fav was the taxes chapter and also the computer helpline chapter. He is brilliant.

Drive thrus aren't just difficult to foreigners, they are difficult for everyone. I usually end of shouting my entire order and the whole neighborhood hears.

Thanks for your feedback on PA. I've been to Philly once and Dorney Park a few times but other than that I don't have much experience with the state. It's seems great location wise, it's got all 4 seasons which my hubby likes, and it's a lot more affordable for us. We are hopefully going there for a day to check out some areas next time we are in NY in Oct.
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Old Jun 26th 2009, 2:35 pm
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Originally Posted by penguinsix
As much as it might scare him, you might want to go through the moving back to the UK threads on this site, and the homesickness and hard times thread on the US expats in the UK site.

http://talk.uk-yankee.com/index.php?board=68.0

You'll start to see patterns in how folks have difficulty adjusting. How one spouse is happy to be in their familiar surroundings and the other is sort of isolated, alone, not quite sure.

I would strongly advise talking through a few 'what ifs' with him. What if he hates it when he arrives (grin and bear it and go with the flow). What if he hates it after 6 months (keep trying?). What if he hates it after a year (go back home, with or without you???)

Or he might end up having the time of his life. It's best to be prepared for the worst and hope for the best.

Good luck with your trip.
Thanks for that link. I will have a look. Following others advice on here I am going to obtain dual nationality just in case we need to come back. I've asked him what about after 6 mos, 1yr, 2yrs, etc but that's all hypothetical and no one really knows whats going to happen till it happens.
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Old Jun 26th 2009, 2:37 pm
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Originally Posted by sarah64
Only bit of advice I can offer (I've been in the US for 20 years now) goes with the poster above. Keep your options completely open for a UK return. Bank accounts/house etc. and if you can possibly keep a potential job return go for it.
Some people love it here and as has been said, some feel as if they never belong so keep the doors open and you'll have choices.
Thanks, definitely. I don't want to get my heart set on things. I'm getting my dual nationality so if the worst happens and we do need to return it should be relatively easy.
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Old Jun 27th 2009, 5:06 pm
  #23  
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Default Re: Your opinions and anything else you can tell me

Originally Posted by JulieinAustin
That's so funny, this happens to me all the time as well.. especially if I ask for water... you think they would fathom it in the restaurants if they've asked me what I want to drink.. but oh no I may as well be speaking Japanese
Hah, that happens to me too. I am a Brit married to an American. It used to annoy when he he'd say "have you got a pin?" and I would ask what he'd need a pin for. Turns out he wanted a PEN! Pin, pen, you would think they would sound completely different, but when he says it they sound exactly the same.
Educate the Americans on how to speak English. That's what I am doing. These flaming Americanese, can't speak proper, like what I does.
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