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You live in...............

You live in...............

Old Jul 19th 2005, 8:41 pm
  #1  
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Default You live in...............

You live in...............

You live in Arizona when..

1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.
2. You can open and drive your car without touching the car door or the steering wheel.
3. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
4. You would give anything to be able to splash cold water on your face.
5. You can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.
6. "Dress Code" is meaningless at high schools and universities. Picture lingerie ads.
7. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave town.
8. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
9. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
10. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.

You Live in California when...

1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2 The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
4. You know how to eat an artichoke.
5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is

You Live in New York City when...

1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
2... You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.
3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circleto Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
4. You think Central Park is "nature,"
5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
6. You've worn out a car horn.
7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.

You Live in Maine when...

1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You have more than one recipe for moose.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.

You Live in the Deep South when...

1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
2."ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.
3. After five years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are Ya?"
4. "He needed killin' " is a valid defense.
5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, MARY BETH, etc.

You live in Colorado when...

1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2... You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center.
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4... The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.

You live in the Midwest when...

1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"

You live in Florida when....

1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people
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Old Jul 19th 2005, 9:38 pm
  #2  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by Ray
You live in...............

You Live in California when...
1. 6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is
This is the most accurate piece if info you have ever posted on the site

oh and post the safety pictures I did genuinely LOL
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Old Jul 19th 2005, 10:43 pm
  #3  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by Ray
You live in...............
You Live in California when...

1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2 The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
4. You know how to eat an artichoke.
5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is

I aint got a clue how to eat an artichoke... now avocados...
my commute is 7mins and doesn't involve a vehicle
1,2,5 & 6 I'll give ya ... LAX is about 25 mins @ 2am and 4 hours @ 5pm.
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 1:02 am
  #4  
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Default Re: You live in...............

5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people

That is so true-my mother sits on two seat cushions so she can see over the steering wheel!!!
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 1:19 am
  #5  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Not wanting Mass to be left out...


* You think crosswalks are for wimps

* You think if someone's nice to you, they either want something or they are from out of town and probably lost

* You know how to cross 4 lanes of traffic in 5 seconds

* You are amazed when traveling out of town that people who work at McDonald's actually speak English

* You think it's not actually tailgating unless your bumper is touching the car in front of you

* You know that a yellow light means at least 5 more cars can get through ... and that a red light means 2 more can

* You could own a small town in Iowa for the cost of your house

* There are 24 Dunkin Donuts shops within 15 minutes of your house

* You think of Rhode Island as the "deep South"

* You believe using a turn signal gives away your plan to the enemy

* If you stay on the same road long enough, it will eventually have 3 or more different names

* All the potholes just add excitement to your driving experience

* Six inches of snow is considered a "dusting"

* Three days of 90+ heat is definitely a "heat wave" ... and 63° weather is "on the warm side"
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 1:26 am
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Default Re: You live in...............

New Jersey quote....

"I am from NJ. I curse... a lot. I say "yo", and I say it often. I never had school on Rosh Hashanah or Yom Kippur. I sure as hell don't pump my own gas. I know what real pizza tastes like, and I know that a bagel is much more than a ****in' roll with a hole in the middle. I judge people by what exit they get off the parkway. I can navigate a circle--with attitude. All good nights must end at a diner--preferably with cheese fries. It's a sub, not a hoagie or, worse yet, a hero, and I wash it down with soda, not pop. Two words... "mother ****er." I don't go to the beach, I go down the shore. And boardwalk brawls are just a part of the atmosphere. Yes, I drink cawfee. I know that 65mph really means 80. I've always lived within 10 minutes of a mall. When someone cuts me off, they get the horn AND the finger. And they expect it. I am from New Jersey, and damn proud of it."
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 2:05 am
  #7  
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Default Re: You live in...............

You live in North Carolina if

When people first meet you they ask which church you belong to

There are more churches than bars

Somehow racism is justified in the Bible

tourists can easily be spotted by there normal sized tires

there are more strip clubs than churches

being called a redneck is considered a compliment

There are more Dixie flags than stars and stripes flying

Every 5th street is named after a confederate general (robert e lee drive, stonewall jackson blvd etc)

people drive in Hurricanes but the streets a empty if there is even a rumour of snow
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 2:32 am
  #8  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by sibsie
Not wanting Mass to be left out...

<<snip>>

* You know how to cross 4 lanes of traffic in 5 seconds

<<snip>>
Now if you can do that on foot, I'd be very impressed!



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Old Jul 20th 2005, 2:44 am
  #9  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by sibsie
Not wanting Mass to be left out...


* You think crosswalks are for wimps

* You think if someone's nice to you, they either want something or they are from out of town and probably lost

* You know how to cross 4 lanes of traffic in 5 seconds

* You are amazed when traveling out of town that people who work at McDonald's actually speak English

* You think it's not actually tailgating unless your bumper is touching the car in front of you

* You know that a yellow light means at least 5 more cars can get through ... and that a red light means 2 more can

* You could own a small town in Iowa for the cost of your house

* There are 24 Dunkin Donuts shops within 15 minutes of your house

* You believe using a turn signal gives away your plan to the enemy

* If you stay on the same road long enough, it will eventually have 3 or more different names

* All the potholes just add excitement to your driving experience
That lot equally apply to South Florida bizarrely.
 
Old Jul 20th 2005, 2:59 am
  #10  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by ImHere
That lot equally apply to South Florida bizarrely.
Well you can blame the bad driving on the Mass snowbirds. Sad lack of Dunkin Donuts down your way though. I'm lost without my latte in the morning and Starbucks are on a perm ban with me.
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 5:47 am
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by sibsie
Well you can blame the bad driving on the Mass snowbirds. Sad lack of Dunkin Donuts down your way though. I'm lost without my latte in the morning and Starbucks are on a perm ban with me.
Oy, don't think we're all hickeys and live in the sticks...we have D.Donuts and even a buncha KK's around (that's two K's, not three, though there are plenty of the latter around too!)
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 8:44 am
  #12  
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Default Re: You live in...............

You live in Hawaii when......
1. Everyone you have ever known (and some you don't) suddenly want to come visit you.

2. Everyone who visits says "I didn't expect it to be so crowded and have huge busy interstates .....what state do they go to? Do they go under the ocean?!?"

3. Seeing an endangered wild sea turtle only gets a tired "OH look another turtle...."

4. You think "get off my island mainlander" is a term of affection compared to the more forthright insults.

5. Seasons of the year?........ vaguely remember what they were..... snow? sorry no idea!

6. The news broadcasters wear lais arund their necks to read the news on Fridays.

7. 'Formal' Dress is a moo moo dress or Hawaiian print skirt and tank top (you MUST paint your toenails though!).

8. Pulling flying cockroaches out of your hair becomes an evening pass time.

9. You are 30 mins late for everything in true Hawaiian time style.

10. You send birthday cards to your family that say "what do you mean this card is late? It is still yesterday here!"
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 11:52 am
  #13  
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Default Re: You live in...............

Anyone read this is in the Australia forum - similar humor/humour ...

http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=314924
 
Old Jul 20th 2005, 12:21 pm
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Default Re: You live in...............

Originally Posted by yorkshire_lass
You live in Hawaii when......
1. Everyone you have ever known (and some you don't) suddenly want to come visit you.

2. Everyone who visits says "I didn't expect it to be so crowded and have huge busy interstates .....what state do they go to? Do they go under the ocean?!?"

3. Seeing an endangered wild sea turtle only gets a tired "OH look another turtle...."

4. You think "get off my island mainlander" is a term of affection compared to the more forthright insults.

5. Seasons of the year?........ vaguely remember what they were..... snow? sorry no idea!

6. The news broadcasters wear lais arund their necks to read the news on Fridays.

7. 'Formal' Dress is a moo moo dress or Hawaiian print skirt and tank top (you MUST paint your toenails though!).

8. Pulling flying cockroaches out of your hair becomes an evening pass time.

9. You are 30 mins late for everything in true Hawaiian time style.

10. You send birthday cards to your family that say "what do you mean this card is late? It is still yesterday here!"
pmsl....by the way can I come and visit
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Old Jul 20th 2005, 12:21 pm
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Default Re: You live in...............

4. You think "get off my island mainlander" is a term of affection compared to the more forthright insults.
I never realized HI and FL's had so much in common
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