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Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Old Jan 11th 2006, 5:04 am
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Default Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

I would like to vent.... I need to vent....

We were set to file the "10-foot barge pole" AOS after our marriage, when we decided, for various reasons, that Toon should return to Holland as planned.

Less than 48 hours later, I'm convinced that this was the absolutely wrong move for us. My health has changed for the worse over the last few weeks, and today I suddenly realised that my blood pressure must be out of sight because I had headaches and black spots in front of my eyes. Sure enough, the monitor at work read 180/102 (and that's ON medication).

With him out of the country, I now either must go to Holland to DCF, or wait the CR-1/K-3 time. I cannot go to Holland until I can get my blood pressure stabilised, however, and I really need him here to help me with the physical grind which is one reason why my blood pressure has soared.

Firstly, I am absolutely *****ed off with my so-called government that it takes a ridiculous amount of time, effort, and money to get one's spouse a visa.

Secondly, I am also *****ed off with those who are absolutists about which route to take to get a visa. These are some lovely and helpful people, but I'd beg them to rethink advocating the one-size-fits-all solutions. In particular, those who despise the 10-foot-bargepole solution: my situation really did change during the three-month VWP stay, and it would have been in my best interest for my health and my entire family to have AOS'd. And to those who think that DCF is the silver bullet if the foreign spouse's country allows it: yeah right. It means a trip to that country, which may be very expensive, may not be possible given the USC's work/family schedule and health. It also requires an interview date at the consulate, which isn't guaranteed to be right away.

I don't know that this belongs in the US Marriage-Based Visa forum for two reasons: I don't want it to go to USENET, AND because both my spouse and I are members here, and I'd like to let everyone who has been helping us and following our story know where we are in the visa process.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 5:46 am
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Congratulations for saying it. You're one of the first actual native-born Americans who I've heard complain sincerely about the total mindless stupidity and delays in your immigration application process. And it's all for nothing: it doesn't protect against undesirables or terrorists, I'm afraid. I cannot understand why people make excuses for it.

The AOS thing is just a further icing on the cake of a system pot-holed with total hypocrisy. Either you can do it or you can't. And as it's the easiest way for two people who want to live together to actually live together, wtf not?

Anyway godspeed on the rest of your journey. Take the path that is best for you, not that dictated by the moral crusaders.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 6:11 am
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Sorry to hear about your troubles and I hope things get sorted out for you soon.

I agree with you on the absolutists. One of the side-effects of the complex mess of immigration is that there are usually several ways of getting from A to B, only one of which is typically recommended. It's been my experience though, that if you can get vis-a-vis with an immigration official to state your case, you'll have pretty good odds no matter how obscure a path you're following. It always seems to boil down to a few simple things, e.g., a) are you a desirable, and b) will you be taking from, rather than giving to, the federal government?
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 12:26 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by snowbunny
I would like to vent.... I need to vent....
Your points are valid. My belief is that BCIS and "our" government (and governments in other countries) are deliberate in making immigration hard.

If it's too easy, then there would be more abuse. I believe they genuinely believe it and that's why BCIS and other governments immigration policies are near impossible to change.

I don't actually THINK they are smart enough to DELIBERATELY make it complex.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 1:08 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by franc11s
Your points are valid. My belief is that BCIS and "our" government (and governments in other countries) are deliberate in making immigration hard.

If it's too easy, then there would be more abuse. I believe they genuinely believe it and that's why BCIS and other governments immigration policies are near impossible to change.

I don't actually THINK they are smart enough to DELIBERATELY make it complex.
Alternatively if it was "too easy", whatever that means, then maybe there'd be less illigal immigration costing the taxpayers billions.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 1:58 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by Angry White Pyjamas
Alternatively if it was "too easy", whatever that means, then maybe there'd be less illigal immigration costing the taxpayers billions.
Uh yeah!

Right now the only way it *is* easy is a) cross the border illegally; b) hire BIG TIME lawyer/take plane trips/get a Private Bill passed in Congress. So.... one way for the poor with little to lose, and one way for the rich, and the rest of us get screwed.

Please do note I am not saying hiring a lawyer is bad. On the other hand if the rich folk had to muck through legal issues and taxes without high-dollar high-powered accountants & lawyers to ease the pain, maybe they would successfully agitate for change.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:07 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

I have to say that when I got married in the UK, we were going to go the route of applying for my visa from within the country, it was going to take a year (and I had to give up my passport and if I needed my passport it would re-start the whole process.) In the end, I needed to have my passport to be able to freely travel and I ended up coming back to the US and applying at the British Consulate in Los Angeles. We had everything in place (forms, etc.) and it was a relatively painless procedure - if you could afford it. We didn't need to worry about a medical certificate. However, I've heard now that you can no longer apply for visas within the country, you must go back to the country that you're from.

When we applied to DCF for my husband and I to come to the States. It was pretty straightforward. I was not impressed that my husband had to receive immunisations, though. But, again, it was all about money and once we paid for filing, medical, immunisations and the visa itself, we were out the door.

I'm sorry for your troubles Amy. I'm sure it can't be easy. I've never gone the route your going. But, I think its getting tougher to apply for visas in general.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:19 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by AmerLisa
I'm sorry for your troubles Amy. I'm sure it can't be easy. I've never gone the route your going. But, I think its getting tougher to apply for visas in general.
Yes, I believe that it is fair to say that the US is not the only country that has made filing for a spousal visa more difficult, costly, and time-consuming.

However, I firmly believe that it's paranoia over terrorism and fraud that has increased these burdens, and I think it's paranoia misplaced. It may also be a reluctance to admit more immigrants, but I find that one hard to swallow given the much shorter time for people sponsored by businesses. Seems highly prejudicial and preferential to me.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:25 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by snowbunny
Yes, I believe that it is fair to say that the US is not the only country that has made filing for a spousal visa more difficult, costly, and time-consuming.

However, I firmly believe that it's paranoia over terrorism and fraud that has increased these burdens, and I think it's paranoia misplaced. It may also be a reluctance to admit more immigrants, but I find that one hard to swallow given the much shorter time for people sponsored by businesses. Seems highly prejudicial and preferential to me.
Paranoia has always been around. Look what happened when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. Things are worse because you're the one being victimised by the whole situation.

What is the time frame now? You're not able to go to Holland? Actually you're lucky you're able to do it that way, if you could go. I had to have lived in the UK for a period of time to be to do DCF for my husband. I'm sorry I don't know the other alternative, I mean wait times, expense, etc. What are you thinking about doing?
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:25 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by snowbunny
Yes, I believe that it is fair to say that the US is not the only country that has made filing for a spousal visa more difficult, costly, and time-consuming.

However, I firmly believe that it's paranoia over terrorism and fraud that has increased these burdens, and I think it's paranoia misplaced. It may also be a reluctance to admit more immigrants, but I find that one hard to swallow given the much shorter time for people sponsored by businesses. Seems highly prejudicial and preferential to me.
Governments like to be "seen" to be doing something about any potential terrorist threat.
In my opinion they couldn't give a toss about whether the steps they are taking are actually effective or not, sure if anyone complains they can just shout them down as being unpatriotic.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:40 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

I don't understand ..any of this ..I know nothing .............
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:41 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by snowbunny
I would like to vent.... I need to vent....

We were set to file the "10-foot barge pole" AOS after our marriage, when we decided, for various reasons, that Toon should return to Holland as planned.
Mistake one ....
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:42 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by Ray
Mistake one ....
Easily corrected with a touch of luck though, I would think.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 2:59 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Have you tried phoning your Senators office for advice/help? Nothing ventured nothing gained.
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Old Jan 11th 2006, 3:02 pm
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Default Re: Warning: Marriage+Immigration can be bad for your health!

Originally Posted by fatbrit
Congratulations for saying it. You're one of the first actual native-born Americans who I've heard complain sincerely about the total mindless stupidity and delays in your immigration application process.
I've heard a few on here.
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