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This USA forum is harsh....

This USA forum is harsh....

Old Oct 16th 2011, 1:04 am
  #1  
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Default This USA forum is harsh....

Hi people,

I used to post on BE prior to my move to Australia from the UK almost 8 years ago. Having separated and divorced from the ex some 3 years back, I met an American girl. We are now quite serious, so I’ve started poking around in the USA forums, just getting idea’s what my/our options are re visa’s etc....WOW! You guys are pretty harsh..!

I’ve really only read a few post, but already I see that some of these guys get hit damn hard (verbally beaten-up in fact) for asking what are apparently pretty stupid/un-researched/un-realistic/pipe-dream type questions. Just an observation. Now I have some questions myself. Dare I ask...?
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 1:28 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

yeah, I have observed the same. Makes me scared to ask in case question is seen to be a stupid one which I should have tried harder to find out the answer to myself before I asked - yikes.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 1:40 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by chippy View Post
I’ve really only read a few post, but already I see that some of these guys get hit damn hard (verbally beaten-up in fact) for asking what are apparently pretty stupid/un-researched/un-realistic/pipe-dream type questions. Just an observation. Now I have some questions myself. Dare I ask...?
Are you seriously saying that you haven't fully read up on 30 years' case history of US immigration law?
And you presume to ask questions that you could so easily research yourself? How dare you post here!
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 1:41 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Well if it's about how can I move to Florida I went to Disney last year and we loved it and want to move there, then they should have started by ready the Wiki is plain to see and has all the information about who qualifies to get what visa. I think they just get a bit jaded by seeing the same question asked in a slightly different format over and over.
Would you prefer that the people on the visas section string them along and tell them it's easy or let them know the truth so they can go into it with eyes wide open, cause no one at the embassy will hold their hand and give them a refund once they have been scammed by a fake agency promising visas or paid for a visa that will be denied.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 2:22 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by chippy View Post
I used to post on BE prior to my move to Australia from the UK almost 8 years ago. Having separated and divorced from the ex some 3 years back, I met an American girl. We are now quite serious, so I’ve started poking around in the USA forums, just getting idea’s what my/our options are re visa’s etc....
OK well in that case you probably already have a pretty good idea of what your options are so if you have questions there is no reason for you not to ask them.

Understand that simply by realizing that you need a visa you are already way ahead of a lot of people who want to move to the US. You are also way ahead from the perspective that (absent any complicating factors such as a criminal record or previous problems with US immigration) marriage to a US citizen is a pretty straightforward way of getting an immigrant visa.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 3:13 am
  #6  
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by chippy View Post
....WOW! You guys are pretty harsh..!

I’ve really only read a few post, but already I see that some of these guys get hit damn hard (verbally beaten-up in fact) for asking what are apparently pretty stupid/un-researched/un-realistic/pipe-dream type questions. Just an observation. Now I have some questions myself. Dare I ask...?
A few months ago I was stuck at home with flu, and I got pretty far back in the archives here. It was absolutely stunning how often the same questions were asked, over and over and over and over again. And I see many of the regular posters who responded were the same ones who are still responding today, long since my own patience would've run out.

People can call expensive embassy phonelines and get vague or bad advice; they can pay 'visa agents' for encouraging words and no actual visa. I don't have a problem with people coming here asking questions, even clueless questions that show no research, but the attitude they give is sometimes hard to take. They want a free, more accurate version of the embassy phoneline with all the fake good news of the visa agents, and, if they don't get that, they often a) get hostile, b) disappear forever, without any acknowledgment to people who've responded or c) start asking about how to do things illegally.

I've spent two years in Japan, and two in Germany, and am a member of separate expat forums for both countries. This forum is by far the most pleasant, and the only one I've made more than ten posts in. People here take the time to respond to vague or unresearched questions, even in situations where the OP has very unrealistic expectations.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 3:13 am
  #7  
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by chippy View Post
Hi people,

I used to post on BE prior to my move to Australia from the UK almost 8 years ago. Having separated and divorced from the ex some 3 years back, I met an American girl. We are now quite serious, so I’ve started poking around in the USA forums, just getting idea’s what my/our options are re visa’s etc....WOW! You guys are pretty harsh..!

I’ve really only read a few post, but already I see that some of these guys get hit damn hard (verbally beaten-up in fact) for asking what are apparently pretty stupid/un-researched/un-realistic/pipe-dream type questions. Just an observation. Now I have some questions myself. Dare I ask...?
I would agree with you on that one. There are individuals on here that seem to relish the opportunity to make new posters feel foolish, instead of either giving the support, or just keeping quiet!

But on the flip side, there are some really awesome, patient, knowledgable, kind people here who have made my journey to the US a lot lot lot easier.

You just have to filter out the know it all, opinonated morons that lurk in the shadows, waiting to give out their snide comments!

Edit: If you want to see a really harsh forum, check out the Canada one! They are vicious to each other!

Last edited by ljaw2002uk; Oct 16th 2011 at 3:37 am. Reason: Typo
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 4:31 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Yes ..they are an absolute shower
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 4:37 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=735756

So how would you respond to the current dufus?
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 5:22 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by Boiler View Post
http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=735756

So how would you respond to the current dufus?
With reference to the following (my bold):
Originally Posted by BE Site rules
1. Personal Attacks
BritishExpats.com is an interactive site, and everyone who participates is "in it together", please treat others the way you wish to be treated. Personal attacks will not be tolerated. Challenge others' points of view and opinions, but do so respectfully and thoughtfully ... without insult or personal attack.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 5:44 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by bivlover View Post
With reference to the following (my bold):
This guy already got a whole thread of people giving him advice about the J1, and taking his questions seriously. His response has been to start a new thread about working illegally, in a forum mostly populated by people who have gone through every cost and frustration of getting visas.

(And not just working illegally: undercutting legit job-seekers in a state with terrible unemployment by working for no wage, on holiday. Bonus points for including a complaint about coffee kiosk employees speaking Spanish.)
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 10:24 am
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

I would tend to agree with the OP. When someone first approaches this forum, the volume of previous posts is staggering, and I suspect at some point the thought "I will just jump in and ask my question, rather than plough through thousands of earlier posts" crosses their minds.

It is very offputting to find posters belittling newbies wishes and desires to move to the USA, espcially when, from their avatars they themselves have made the move. You've done it, you've made the jump, why go to such lengths to put someone else off?

By all means point out the pitfalls, obstacles and drawbacks, but don't, please, sneer at someone who wants to persue their dream -just as you did.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 12:21 pm
  #13  
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by chippy View Post
Hi people,

I used to post on BE prior to my move to Australia from the UK almost 8 years ago. Having separated and divorced from the ex some 3 years back, I met an American girl. We are now quite serious, so I’ve started poking around in the USA forums, just getting idea’s what my/our options are re visa’s etc....WOW! You guys are pretty harsh..!

I’ve really only read a few post, but already I see that some of these guys get hit damn hard (verbally beaten-up in fact) for asking what are apparently pretty stupid/un-researched/un-realistic/pipe-dream type questions. Just an observation. Now I have some questions myself. Dare I ask...?
if only she was canadian....everyones really nice in the canadian forum
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 2:16 pm
  #14  
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

Originally Posted by Sancho_p View Post
It is very offputting to find posters belittling newbies
Oh, Boo-Hoo!

The answer to their questions can usually be found by a quick "Google." The rules for Immigration are clearly defined and cannot be skated around in a legal manner.

Sometimes, you just have to be cruel to be kind.

The name of this Forum is "British Expats" as opposed to "British Expat Wannabees." Help is there for those people going through a legitimate process, but, real advice is there for those who just have a pipedream.


Jim.
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Old Oct 16th 2011, 2:51 pm
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Default Re: This USA forum is harsh....

jg2802: I don't think you even realize that you are the "dufus" referred to in the above posts. It takes all kinds I guess. Run along and let the rest of us enjoy our Sunday. Thank you.



Originally Posted by MoshiMoshi View Post
This guy already got a whole thread of people giving him advice about the J1, and taking his questions seriously. His response has been to start a new thread about working illegally, in a forum mostly populated by people who have gone through every cost and frustration of getting visas.

(And not just working illegally: undercutting legit job-seekers in a state with terrible unemployment by working for no wage, on holiday. Bonus points for including a complaint about coffee kiosk employees speaking Spanish.)
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