Pimpbot

1.Two World Wars and One World Cup doo-dah doo-dah.
2.Warm beer.
3.You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket.
4.You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events.
5.Union jack underpants.
6.Water shortages guaranteed every single summer.
7.You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
8.Bathing once a week-whether you need to or not.
9.Ditto changing underwear.
10.Beats being Welsh.

Add your own

Yosser

When in road rage in the states, you can call the idiot that nearly crashed into you a "wanker", followed by the five knuckle shuffle action and the yanks don't have a clue what you are yelling about

doctor scrumpy

The rest of the world thinks they are better than the English

The English KNOW they are better than the rest of the world

Lion in Winter

In the U.S. your English accent will be confused with intelligence and/or education.

Stumpyguy

God, isn't that the truth!

nathan barley

If you are an Englishman in America, you will be asked how London is on several occasions throughout the day, despite the fact you've never been to the city and lived 500 miles away from it.

Americans claim to hate the French, but the British wrote the book on hating them more.

A deep, longing yearning for a real beer when a friend hands you a Coors.

Uncomfortable conversation topics with drunken American friends on the 4th of July

Playing your 'Frenchie' trump card (See above)

kazzuk

Because we know how to "belly laugh"

JerseyBoy

Not to mention all those lovely American girls telling you how "cute" and "adorable" your accent is

kazzuk

Because we understand the humour of

Only Fools and Horses
Fawlty Towers
Black Adder

ukemigrant

11. You got to occupy and rule most of the known world (for a while) and contributed to a significant part of the 20th Century's strife: India & Pakistan - leaving Kashmir in indeterminate state; Northern Ireland - 71 years of trouble and counting since creating the artifical state in 1922; Palestine and Israel - Israel's growth was ably assisted by the English government; Cyprus - made a colony in 1925, still trouble and strife to this day; China - occupied until forced out around the 1900s; Africa - large swathes occupied by Britain until mid-20th Century; Falklands - occupation of Argentinian island (although to be fair it was occupied by the French, Spanish and God knows who else prior to British occupation, but think Argentina claiming they owned the Isle of Man, or Jersey).

PS For those who don't know, the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland (UK for short) is made up of Wales, Scotland, England and Northern Ireland (obviously), making a British person English, Welsh or Scottish. But for those of you who know your English history, you can virtually equate British aggression and colonisation with English aggression and colonisation, since England has dominated the British Isles probably since the 1200s onwards.

Let the flaming begin!

Lion in Winter

Or, conversely, as in my case, American men finding us English women "exotic". Now tell me, where else in the world does THAT happen!

JerseyBoy

Well - certainly no-where else in the developed world.

Pulaski

I guess that the others were smart enough to work out that it is a God-forsaken pimple on the @rse end of the earth and got the hell out!

Anyway, Argentina's claim the Falklands is that they were occupied by Spain at the same time that Argentina was; which makes it rather like India claiming Jamaica because they were both simultaneously colonies of the United Kingdom.

Pulaski

Oh yes, those immortal words "I just luuuurve your accent!" ..... If only I had a dollar for every time I'd heard that said.

kazzuk

Exotic - yes

I have been here 12 weeks and already developed a belly that shakes when I dance