A Special Request
Aug 12th 2002, 4:10 pm
#16
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
I have experienced some different types of prejudice. Like when Che-Ning and I went
to buy her some makeup. (She never wore it before) and the woman behind the makeup
counter totally ignored Che-Ning and just talked to me. It was like she thought a
foreign looking woman could not communicate. I don't know what she was thinking.
We also live in the South. We know to stay out of certain bars. People refer to
Che-Ning as my "gook wife". They can't even get their derogatory terms right. She's
a "Chink" not a "Gook"! Funny thing is, the town where I grew up, Pekin, IL, their
sports teams were all called the Pekin Chinks until well into the 1980's.
We could all focus on the derogatory, but we try not to. Usually the incidents are
far and few between. But it does burn my A$$ when it does happen.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"K" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> Originally posted by Andy Platt:
> > "rogerpenycate" wrote:
> >
> > > I rest my case and look forward to arriving and starting my new life (with my
> > > US wife) at Dulles Airport on the 25th August.
> >
> > What a horrible thought - starting a new life at Dulles!
> >
> > Andy.
> >
> > --
> > I'm not really here - it's just your warped imagination.
> >
> Unfortuantely this kind of thing has happened to me twice, Dave was working one
> night and he was saying that we had recently married and that i was from overseas,
> they then asked him if American Women wernt good enough for him.
> Another incident was when he was talking to a friend (no maybe too strong a word)
> aquaintance...in that instance i got refered to as the expensive girlfriend/wife.
> It p****s me off because at the time we were together before we got married almost
> all flights etc came from my side and not the american side of the finances, not
> that im digging at dave for it, but goddess, they really try to make you out to be
> a gold digger sometimes...even if your from the uk, talk about prejudice....not
> fair, i just hope that none of you have run into this. Its nasty.
> --
> Posted via http://britishexpats.com
to buy her some makeup. (She never wore it before) and the woman behind the makeup
counter totally ignored Che-Ning and just talked to me. It was like she thought a
foreign looking woman could not communicate. I don't know what she was thinking.
We also live in the South. We know to stay out of certain bars. People refer to
Che-Ning as my "gook wife". They can't even get their derogatory terms right. She's
a "Chink" not a "Gook"! Funny thing is, the town where I grew up, Pekin, IL, their
sports teams were all called the Pekin Chinks until well into the 1980's.
We could all focus on the derogatory, but we try not to. Usually the incidents are
far and few between. But it does burn my A$$ when it does happen.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"K" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> Originally posted by Andy Platt:
> > "rogerpenycate" wrote:
> >
> > > I rest my case and look forward to arriving and starting my new life (with my
> > > US wife) at Dulles Airport on the 25th August.
> >
> > What a horrible thought - starting a new life at Dulles!
> >
> > Andy.
> >
> > --
> > I'm not really here - it's just your warped imagination.
> >
> Unfortuantely this kind of thing has happened to me twice, Dave was working one
> night and he was saying that we had recently married and that i was from overseas,
> they then asked him if American Women wernt good enough for him.
> Another incident was when he was talking to a friend (no maybe too strong a word)
> aquaintance...in that instance i got refered to as the expensive girlfriend/wife.
> It p****s me off because at the time we were together before we got married almost
> all flights etc came from my side and not the american side of the finances, not
> that im digging at dave for it, but goddess, they really try to make you out to be
> a gold digger sometimes...even if your from the uk, talk about prejudice....not
> fair, i just hope that none of you have run into this. Its nasty.
> --
> Posted via http://britishexpats.com
Aug 15th 2002, 6:05 am
#17
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
Jonathan_ATC wrote:
! Funny thing is, the town where
> I grew up, Pekin, IL, their sports teams were all called the Pekin Chinks until
> well into the 1980's.
Now they are the Dragons
and the high school campuses are now merged into the
newer campus. My 3 oldest children live in Pekin and graduate from Pekin High. I am
from Lincoln.
! Funny thing is, the town where
> I grew up, Pekin, IL, their sports teams were all called the Pekin Chinks until
> well into the 1980's.
Now they are the Dragons
and the high school campuses are now merged into thenewer campus. My 3 oldest children live in Pekin and graduate from Pekin High. I am
from Lincoln.
Aug 15th 2002, 7:31 pm
#18
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
> However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" ( see
> recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed in
this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men – almost
always men – who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype – but what the
hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might be like –
– he "met" his wife through a marriage broker – his wife is considerably younger and
from a poor country – he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because
expects that she will be deferential to him – he regards her native country as that
hellhole he saved her from – because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in
this NG that there are new immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation
for their native countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages,
and who dare to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US – he reads this
NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an attorney.
> recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed in
this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men – almost
always men – who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype – but what the
hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might be like –
– he "met" his wife through a marriage broker – his wife is considerably younger and
from a poor country – he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because
expects that she will be deferential to him – he regards her native country as that
hellhole he saved her from – because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in
this NG that there are new immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation
for their native countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages,
and who dare to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US – he reads this
NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an attorney.
Aug 15th 2002, 10:33 pm
#19
Joined: Dec 2001
Location: Dixie, ex UK
Posts: 52,448
Re: Re: A Special Request
Originally posted by K:
Unfortuantely this kind of thing has happened to me twice, Dave was working one night and he was saying that we had recently married and that i was from overseas, they then asked him if American Women wernt good enough for him.
Another incident was when he was talking to a friend (no maybe too strong a word) aquaintance...in that instance i got refered to as the expensive girlfriend/wife. It p****s me off because at the time we were together before we got married almost all flights etc came from my side and not the american side of the finances, not that im digging at dave for it, but goddess, they really try to make you out to be a gold digger sometimes...even if your from the uk, talk about prejudice....not fair, i just hope that none of you have run into this. Its nasty.
Unfortuantely this kind of thing has happened to me twice, Dave was working one night and he was saying that we had recently married and that i was from overseas, they then asked him if American Women wernt good enough for him.
Another incident was when he was talking to a friend (no maybe too strong a word) aquaintance...in that instance i got refered to as the expensive girlfriend/wife. It p****s me off because at the time we were together before we got married almost all flights etc came from my side and not the american side of the finances, not that im digging at dave for it, but goddess, they really try to make you out to be a gold digger sometimes...even if your from the uk, talk about prejudice....not fair, i just hope that none of you have run into this. Its nasty.
My tip for fitting in, if you are planning to make the US your home is to make it clear that you are here to stay, NOT by making announcements and speeches, but by what you say and do day-to-day. Learn what is of interest and topical here, and have something to say about it, don't carp on about how you miss soccer, Coronation Street and Marmite. And yes, use the local lingo, arguments about "football", "gas" and how to pronounce "tomato" or spell "check" won't help you to fit in.
Things are different here, enjoy the differences and leave things perculiar to the UK behind. There are some things that you just can't get here that I loved, fish and chips, a range of ales in a convivial pub, black pudding (yes really), coverage of F1, ... I could go on. There is no replacement for them, no alternative, but do I truely miss them? No. not really. My life has changed, and there are new things to discover and enjoy. People often ask, when they learn that I have moved here permanently (not on a 2-3 year contract) what I miss about the UK, and I have always said nothing much. They also asked if I missed soccer, during the world cup, and I said that I was glad to be away from the saturation coverage.
You are now a US resident, and in a few years probably a citizen too, so immerse yourself in US culture (!?) and enjoy the many things that the US has to offer.
Last edited by Pulaski; Aug 15th 2002 at 10:40 pm.
Aug 16th 2002, 7:23 am
#20
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
Paul wrote:
> – he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
What in the world does this mean? It sounds like an insult to all on this group that
don't have high incomes. Also, just because people read the newsgroup doesn't mean
they can't afford an attorney. You can take your Georgetown education and still be
unemployed or underemployed at some point.
> – he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
What in the world does this mean? It sounds like an insult to all on this group that
don't have high incomes. Also, just because people read the newsgroup doesn't mean
they can't afford an attorney. You can take your Georgetown education and still be
unemployed or underemployed at some point.
Aug 16th 2002, 2:34 pm
#21
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
rogerpenycate <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:<[email protected]>...
> Finally, whether you are from UK. China. Pakistan, India, AUS. Canada, Phillipines,
> Russia (or former States) Nigeria or Timbucktoo, who cares. As I said at the start
> of this "book" we all have something in common. I know that all Americans are not
> in the same mould as these people, so continue to post your message, and we who
> care will reply. Finally (2) If we don't reply to these TROLLS they will go away
> and bore somebody else.
> I rest my case and look forward to arriving and starting my new life (with my US
> wife) at Dulles Airport on the 25th August.
> Roget
Your post was a breath of fresh air Roger. Thank you for that. My spouse has come
from one of the above countries you mentioned, so the bigotry spewed on this thread
does take me aback at times and I'm happy to say that I don't make myself a part of
these threads. But, when sophmoric posts of this nature spring up, I consistently
ignore them as I have been doing for the past 2.5 years as a participant here.
Trolls will come and trolls will go; but they go much faster when they are ignored!
Regards, Omo
news:<[email protected]>...
> Finally, whether you are from UK. China. Pakistan, India, AUS. Canada, Phillipines,
> Russia (or former States) Nigeria or Timbucktoo, who cares. As I said at the start
> of this "book" we all have something in common. I know that all Americans are not
> in the same mould as these people, so continue to post your message, and we who
> care will reply. Finally (2) If we don't reply to these TROLLS they will go away
> and bore somebody else.
> I rest my case and look forward to arriving and starting my new life (with my US
> wife) at Dulles Airport on the 25th August.
> Roget
Your post was a breath of fresh air Roger. Thank you for that. My spouse has come
from one of the above countries you mentioned, so the bigotry spewed on this thread
does take me aback at times and I'm happy to say that I don't make myself a part of
these threads. But, when sophmoric posts of this nature spring up, I consistently
ignore them as I have been doing for the past 2.5 years as a participant here.
Trolls will come and trolls will go; but they go much faster when they are ignored!
Regards, Omo
Aug 17th 2002, 1:19 am
#22
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
I met my wife at Florida State University She is 8 months older than me I feel
Taiwan, where she is from is no hell hole. We could easily live there as comfortably
as here. I read this newsgroup because I enjoy helping people. Hell, I wrote a whole
100 page website on the subject to help people.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"Paul" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
om...
> > However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" (
> > see recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> > stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> > (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> > objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> > we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> > become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
> I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed
> in this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men -
> almost always men - who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype - but
> what the hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might
> be like -
> - he "met" his wife through a marriage broker
> - his wife is considerably younger and from a poor country
> - he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because expects that she
> will be deferential to him
> - he regards her native country as that hellhole he saved her from
> - because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in this NG that there are new
> immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation for their native
> countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages, and who dare
> to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US
> - he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
Taiwan, where she is from is no hell hole. We could easily live there as comfortably
as here. I read this newsgroup because I enjoy helping people. Hell, I wrote a whole
100 page website on the subject to help people.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"Paul" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
om...
> > However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" (
> > see recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> > stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> > (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> > objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> > we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> > become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
> I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed
> in this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men -
> almost always men - who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype - but
> what the hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might
> be like -
> - he "met" his wife through a marriage broker
> - his wife is considerably younger and from a poor country
> - he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because expects that she
> will be deferential to him
> - he regards her native country as that hellhole he saved her from
> - because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in this NG that there are new
> immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation for their native
> countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages, and who dare
> to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US
> - he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
Aug 17th 2002, 1:23 am
#23
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
I met my wife at Florida State University She is 8 months older than me I feel
Taiwan, where she is from is no hell hole. We could easily live there as comfortably
as here. I read this newsgroup because I enjoy helping people. Hell, I wrote a whole
100 page website on the subject to help people.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"Paul" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
om...
> > However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" (
> > see recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> > stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> > (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> > objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> > we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> > become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
> I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed
> in this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men -
> almost always men - who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype - but
> what the hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might
> be like -
> - he "met" his wife through a marriage broker
> - his wife is considerably younger and from a poor country
> - he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because expects that she
> will be deferential to him
> - he regards her native country as that hellhole he saved her from
> - because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in this NG that there are new
> immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation for their native
> countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages, and who dare
> to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US
> - he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
Taiwan, where she is from is no hell hole. We could easily live there as comfortably
as here. I read this newsgroup because I enjoy helping people. Hell, I wrote a whole
100 page website on the subject to help people.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"Paul" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
om...
> > However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" (
> > see recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> > stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> > (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> > objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> > we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> > become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
> I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed
> in this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men -
> almost always men - who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype - but
> what the hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might
> be like -
> - he "met" his wife through a marriage broker
> - his wife is considerably younger and from a poor country
> - he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because expects that she
> will be deferential to him
> - he regards her native country as that hellhole he saved her from
> - because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in this NG that there are new
> immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation for their native
> countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages, and who dare
> to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US
> - he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
Aug 17th 2002, 1:25 am
#24
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
I met my wife at Florida State University She is 8 months older than me I feel
Taiwan, where she is from is no hell hole. We could easily live there as comfortably
as here. I read this newsgroup because I enjoy helping people. Hell, I wrote a whole
100 page website on the subject to help people.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"Paul" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
om...
> > However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" (
> > see recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> > stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> > (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> > objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> > we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> > become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
> I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed
> in this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men -
> almost always men - who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype - but
> what the hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might
> be like -
> - he "met" his wife through a marriage broker
> - his wife is considerably younger and from a poor country
> - he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because expects that she
> will be deferential to him
> - he regards her native country as that hellhole he saved her from
> - because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in this NG that there are new
> immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation for their native
> countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages, and who dare
> to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US
> - he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
Taiwan, where she is from is no hell hole. We could easily live there as comfortably
as here. I read this newsgroup because I enjoy helping people. Hell, I wrote a whole
100 page website on the subject to help people.
--
Jonathan_ATC
"Paul" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
om...
> > However there are some "dickheads" and TROLLs who have decided to "target us" (
> > see recent postings) with their xenophobic attitudes. This process is extremely
> > stressful (as we all know) and so that we don't waste our time on these wankers
> > (excuse my language) I suggest we ALL ignore their postings and get on with our
> > objectives of being with our partners. Most of us on here are intellegant people,
> > we do not need to sink to, or absorb ourselves in their "anti-alien" "you must
> > become citizens" "we won the war" Bullshit.
> I'm also taken aback by some of the sundry phobias and hatreds that are expressed
> in this NG. What's surprising is that some of the nastier posts come from men -
> almost always men - who claim to have foreign wives. I hate to stereotype - but
> what the hell. So I've created my own profile of what one of these posters might
> be like -
> - he "met" his wife through a marriage broker
> - his wife is considerably younger and from a poor country
> - he especially chose a younger woman from a poor country because expects that she
> will be deferential to him
> - he regards her native country as that hellhole he saved her from
> - because of the above, it drives him crazy to read in this NG that there are new
> immigrants, especially women, who retain an appreciation for their native
> countries, who insist on occasionally using their native languages, and who dare
> to recognize some of the less positive aspects of the US
> - he reads this NG because his salary at Wal-Mart doesn't leave much for an
> attorney.
Aug 19th 2002, 1:11 pm
#25
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: A Special Request
I was referring to the small band of hate-mongers mentioned in the original post
(which is why I retained the text in my message). I know what a helpful, supportive,
informative contributor you are. I don't understand why you would have taken my
remarks personally, but if you did, I apologize.
(which is why I retained the text in my message). I know what a helpful, supportive,
informative contributor you are. I don't understand why you would have taken my
remarks personally, but if you did, I apologize.
