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Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Old Jun 25th 2018, 2:04 am
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Default Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Yesterday, we put our cat to sleep. He was part of our family for 16 1/2 years after we adopted him from a foster program. They said he was about 3 to 4 years old when we adopted him. So altogether he made it to about 20 years old. He was loosing a lot of weight because of throwing up and kidney failure and was becoming very weak and just didn't have any will to live anymore. I didn't realize how much we would miss him!! Both my husband and I took him to the vet together. I had planned on staying in the room while they euthanized him, but I lost it and had to walk out, while my husband stayed there with him. It was an extremely rapid process. I regret not been in the room for him during his passing.
He came into the house ruling the rooster. He was jealous when my 13 year old was brought home from the hospital, jealous when we adopted our second cat, but by the time we adopted our second child...he said screw it. He thought he was a dog because he loved to run after his mouse and bring it back to us when we would throw it for him; greet us when we came home as soon as heard the garage door go up; lay by my son while he did his homework; be my husband's 5am alarm clock.
The worst this morning when my 2 year old gives both my cats treats and when Shandy didn't show up for his treats, my son started shouting "Shandy ...where are you...treats!"
Just wondering how some of you have dealt with getting over your best friends. Please no advice on getting another pet. My hands are full and when you go on vacation it is always a hassle with pets. Just lots of guilt not been in the room when he passed, although I did go back in the room to say goodbye after he had passed.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 2:09 am
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by moi View Post
Yesterday, we put our cat to sleep. He was part of our family for 16 1/2 years after we adopted him from a foster program. They said he was about 3 to 4 years old when we adopted him. So altogether he made it to about 20 years old. He was loosing a lot of weight because of throwing up and kidney failure and was becoming very weak and just didn't have any will to live anymore. I didn't realize how much we would miss him!! Both my husband and I took him to the vet together. I had planned on staying in the room while they euthanized him, but I lost it and had to walk out, while my husband stayed there with him. It was an extremely rapid process. I regret not been in the room for him during his passing.
He came into the house ruling the rooster. He was jealous when my 13 year old was brought home from the hospital, jealous when we adopted our second cat, but by the time we adopted our second child...he said screw it. He thought he was a dog because he loved to run after his mouse and bring it back to us when we would throw it for him; greet us when we came home as soon as heard the garage door go up; lay by my son while he did his homework; be my husband's 5am alarm clock.
The worst this morning when my 2 year old gives both my cats treats and when Shandy didn't show up for his treats, my son started shouting "Shandy ...where are you...treats!"
Just wondering how some of you have dealt with getting over your best friends. Please no advice on getting another pet. My hands are full and when you go on vacation it is always a hassle with pets. Just lots of guilt not been in the room when he passed, although I did go back in the room to say goodbye after he had passed.
I'm so sorry to hear about Shandy. He sounds like a real character and a wonderful friend.
No advice about how to get over it unfortunately, it's been 6 months since we lost our goldie and the pain hasn't lessened.
Take care xx
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 2:34 am
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by moi View Post
Yesterday, we put our cat to sleep. He was part of our family for 16 1/2 years after we adopted him from a foster program. They said he was about 3 to 4 years old when we adopted him. So altogether he made it to about 20 years old. He was loosing a lot of weight because of throwing up and kidney failure and was becoming very weak and just didn't have any will to live anymore. I didn't realize how much we would miss him!! Both my husband and I took him to the vet together. I had planned on staying in the room while they euthanized him, but I lost it and had to walk out, while my husband stayed there with him. It was an extremely rapid process. I regret not been in the room for him during his passing.
He came into the house ruling the rooster. He was jealous when my 13 year old was brought home from the hospital, jealous when we adopted our second cat, but by the time we adopted our second child...he said screw it. He thought he was a dog because he loved to run after his mouse and bring it back to us when we would throw it for him; greet us when we came home as soon as heard the garage door go up; lay by my son while he did his homework; be my husband's 5am alarm clock.
The worst this morning when my 2 year old gives both my cats treats and when Shandy didn't show up for his treats, my son started shouting "Shandy ...where are you...treats!"
Just wondering how some of you have dealt with getting over your best friends. Please no advice on getting another pet. My hands are full and when you go on vacation it is always a hassle with pets. Just lots of guilt not been in the room when he passed, although I did go back in the room to say goodbye after he had passed.
Please do not feel any sort of guilt. You loved Shandy and he knew it. You cared for him and you gave him the best life.
Missing the last moment is just fine. It would have been seconds.

My wonderful old Tyler pusscat died just four weeks ago. He very nearly made it to 20 yrs old . He emigrated with me 14 yrs ago. Had Tyler not been able to come with me then I would not have emigrated. That is how much this pusscat meant to me for all of his years.

I had taken him for an overnight at the vet clinic as he felt a bit poorly. He died there unexpectedly although comfortable and pain free but without me. At least I was spared having to do that final decision which I was dreading.

You have all the hugs and more in the world from me. It is very hard as they are so much a part of our families and in our hearts.

x
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 2:42 am
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

So sorry about your loss, moi. There’s no magic trick for getting over the loss of a pet. I still miss every dog with whom I have shared my life, but the passing of time makes it easier to remember the happy years rather than dwelling on the sadness of the loss.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 5:17 am
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by moi View Post
Yesterday, we put our cat to sleep. He was part of our family for 16 1/2 years after we adopted him from a foster program. They said he was about 3 to 4 years old when we adopted him. So altogether he made it to about 20 years old. He was loosing a lot of weight because of throwing up and kidney failure and was becoming very weak and just didn't have any will to live anymore. I didn't realize how much we would miss him!! Both my husband and I took him to the vet together. I had planned on staying in the room while they euthanized him, but I lost it and had to walk out, while my husband stayed there with him. It was an extremely rapid process. I regret not been in the room for him during his passing.
He came into the house ruling the rooster. He was jealous when my 13 year old was brought home from the hospital, jealous when we adopted our second cat, but by the time we adopted our second child...he said screw it. He thought he was a dog because he loved to run after his mouse and bring it back to us when we would throw it for him; greet us when we came home as soon as heard the garage door go up; lay by my son while he did his homework; be my husband's 5am alarm clock.
The worst this morning when my 2 year old gives both my cats treats and when Shandy didn't show up for his treats, my son started shouting "Shandy ...where are you...treats!"
Just wondering how some of you have dealt with getting over your best friends. Please no advice on getting another pet. My hands are full and when you go on vacation it is always a hassle with pets. Just lots of guilt not been in the room when he passed, although I did go back in the room to say goodbye after he had passed.
Don't feel guilty about not being there at the time. What matters is that you and your DH were there for him through most of his life, and were kind and loving enough not to have him suffer. You never really "get over" having to lose a beloved family member, it's just the pain gets a little less over time. The happy memories of the funny things they did, will help.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 11:43 am
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

It is never easy to lose our family pets. They are family members and are missed as they are loved and valued. We have had to put down an elderly little lady of 20 who was in pain and wasting away and suffering. I've given daily intravenous drips to another of our cats who suffered from kidney disease but in the end her short life was ended when she was no longer responding to therapy and could not stand any longer. I've been in the room with all but one of the multitude of pets that we have had to have them euthanized. It is the hardest part of being a pet parent.
When my husband and I married 20 years ago, he moved to the US where I had 3 cats already and he brought his two with him. Of the 5, all are gone and their urns grace our bookshelves. They are to be buried with my husband's ashes in Canada when he passes, as hubby wishes to rest along side his son who died 35 years ago. She still talk about our lovely fur babies and recount the stories that make us happy that they were part of our lives. Our pets have given us comfort and love and missing them is natural.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 12:37 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

My thoughts are with you Moi. I can't imagine putting Tiger down and he has only been in the house for 5 months - you grow attached to them, they are family. Just know that you gave pusscat the best life he could have had, and in his final moments he was not in pain or scared of what was coming. There is no amount of time until you will feel better, but it will get better, in time.

Hugs.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 3:48 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by moi View Post
Just wondering how some of you have dealt with getting over your best friends.
No different from a human friend or relative. Allow yourselves to grieve in whatever way is right for you and your family. If you have young children, there are age-appropriate books out there to help them through the loss of a pet. When my brother's family lost their cat unexpectedly, my nephew got sent home from school with one as his reading homework by a very kind teacher. Some kind of remembrance like compiling a photo book or book of memories may help too. My brother's family planted a bush in their garden and hung cat toys on it and decorated it at Christmas.

The feeling that something or someone is missing from the household takes longest to fade, you can only wait for time to pass on that one. Sending best wishes.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 4:28 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

When one of my dogs died at the beginning of the year it was rough, especially on my 4 year old. We ended up buying her a stuffed toy that looked like him and it seemed to help her.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 4:37 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

I'm sure there are many people who could not be there for such a sad event. Not sure I could do so. It is the life you gave him over 16 or so years that counts, don't beat yourself up thinking of the last few seconds.
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Old Jun 25th 2018, 5:03 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Saying goodbye to our pets and making that final decision on their behalf is the hardest decision we make for them and yet also a privilege and a responsibility too. In many ways it is the quid pro quo for the joy and love we experience from having them in our lives. Don't feel guilty as in no way did you fail him. In time you will remember all the silly fun things he did more than the last trip to the vets, yes you will miss him, but I am absolutely certain you will also have many good memories that will make you smile too. xxx
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Old Jun 28th 2018, 6:57 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by lizzyq View Post
Saying goodbye to our pets and making that final decision on their behalf is the hardest decision we make for them and yet also a privilege and a responsibility too. In many ways it is the quid pro quo for the joy and love we experience from having them in our lives. Don't feel guilty as in no way did you fail him. In time you will remember all the silly fun things he did more than the last trip to the vets, yes you will miss him, but I am absolutely certain you will also have many good memories that will make you smile too. xxx
x2.
I had to put T down last year and it gutted me. I adapted Tarka when she was 10 weeks old and she got me through some very tough times during the past 13 years; I often reflect to wonder, "Who rescued who?". Tbh, there are days I still miss her and I am only at the point now to entertain the notion of adapting another companion.
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Old Jun 30th 2018, 11:00 am
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by moi View Post
Yesterday, we put our cat to sleep. He was part of our family for 16 1/2 years after we adopted him from a foster program. They said he was about 3 to 4 years old when we adopted him. So altogether he made it to about 20 years old. He was loosing a lot of weight because of throwing up and kidney failure and was becoming very weak and just didn't have any will to live anymore. I didn't realize how much we would miss him!! Both my husband and I took him to the vet together. I had planned on staying in the room while they euthanized him, but I lost it and had to walk out, while my husband stayed there with him. It was an extremely rapid process. I regret not been in the room for him during his passing.
He came into the house ruling the rooster. He was jealous when my 13 year old was brought home from the hospital, jealous when we adopted our second cat, but by the time we adopted our second child...he said screw it. He thought he was a dog because he loved to run after his mouse and bring it back to us when we would throw it for him; greet us when we came home as soon as heard the garage door go up; lay by my son while he did his homework; be my husband's 5am alarm clock.
The worst this morning when my 2 year old gives both my cats treats and when Shandy didn't show up for his treats, my son started shouting "Shandy ...where are you...treats!"
Just wondering how some of you have dealt with getting over your best friends. Please no advice on getting another pet. My hands are full and when you go on vacation it is always a hassle with pets. Just lots of guilt not been in the room when he passed, although I did go back in the room to say goodbye after he had passed.
At least you were there to see him over the rainbow bridge, and he is now pain free.
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Old Jun 30th 2018, 4:41 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Sorry for your lost and like everyone else has said, it will take time to get over it. We have had 3 pets put to sleep over the last 10 yrs.
The first one I couldn't go with her. She had been crushed by a set of drawers in my son's room when she was about 6 months old and it took us weeks with daily visits to the vets to nurse her back to some sort of health. Unfortunately she was never the same kitten/ cat and suffered serious brain damage. By the age of 3.5 she went down hill rapidly and we knew it was the end. I got my son to take her to the vet. I couldn't face the grief.
When Mo, her companion cat, became too sick 2 yrs ago, the vet suggested it might be getting to the time when we might consider not pursuing anymore treatment. She saw I was very upset with this, even though I knew the same myself. That was when she suggested looking into a mobile vet who puts pets to sleep at home and arranges all the after care. A few months later we did this and I have to say it was the best way to do it. No distressed animal in the car and all the other animals were around as she took her journey. After the vet left, she send in the people who were going to cremate her. They carried her out in a special basket, taking into account our feelings all the time. Unfortunately, we had to do the same for our dear dog Angus aged 16 , just last week.
We had planned it for just over a week. So we were able to make it the best week he had for a long time, with a short walk to the creek and time for my grand-daughter to say her goodbyes. We were very matter of fact with her, telling her that Angus was very old and sick so it was best that he die with all our love surrounding him.
The problem we have, is with the younger dog who is only 4. He is obviously missing his meal time companion and is not eating all of his food at the moment. Day by day, he is getting there but it will take time for him to become use to being the only pet in the house now.
We will not be getting any more pets as we are now in our 60's. I don't want to be in the situation I had with my parents, who had 3 cats who had to re-homed when my parents health declined.
Hope your hurt subsides soon and treasure all the memories you have.
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Old Jun 30th 2018, 5:17 pm
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Default Re: Saying Goodbye To Your Fur Kids

Originally Posted by jjmb View Post
We will not be getting any more pets as we are now in our 60's. I don't want to be in the situation I had with my parents, who had 3 cats who had to re-homed when my parents health declined.
many shelters have older cats that need fostering and adopting - those that had to be given up like your parent’s cats. Could you not offer homes to them in their older age? You aren’t old in your 60s, and unless you have health issues already, you could offer a good home for cats for at least another 10 years - plus having pets offers humans health benefits too.
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