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Really settled now!

Really settled now!

Old Sep 26th 2012, 6:36 pm
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Default Really settled now!

Hi,

Newbie here! I just wanted to share the fact that I feel that I have now made my move a permanent one. Have been living in South West Virginia for 3 years and this year got my 10 yr green card and will have my citizenship interview in October. To cap it off, I've sold my house in the UK and am about to close on a property here. It's been a busy year selling the UK home, with buyers pulling out at the last minute and my final buyer (no.3), holding me to ransom for a lower price the day before exchange. What a refreshing and fast system we have here by comparison!

I went back to the UK the first week of September to finalize the house sale and for my daughter's graduation and one thing that had me worried was that I might feel homesick (1st visit back). Sadly to say, I didn't one bit. Just felt that the place (Reading) looked really sad, a bit dirty and very overcrowded. By the end of the week I was looking forward to coming home to Virginia. I guess I've got used to a much slower pace of life.

However I won't say that putting down such permenant roots here isn't overwhelming! But being in our 50's and both my husband and I lucky to have jobs here, it makes no sense to uproot and rock the boat. There's no realistic chance of a job in the UK anyways for our age group I feel.

Hope to make some new friends here on this forum - that's one thing I've found difficult about moving here, leaving long time friends with mutual history and trying to make new ones.

Thanks for listening!
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 6:50 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by treasuredr View Post
Hi,

Newbie here! I just wanted to share the fact that I feel that I have now made my move a permanent one. Have been living in South West Virginia for 3 years and this year got my 10 yr green card and will have my citizenship interview in October. To cap it off, I've sold my house in the UK and am about to close on a property here. It's been a busy year selling the UK home, with buyers pulling out at the last minute and my final buyer (no.3), holding me to ransom for a lower price the day before exchange. What a refreshing and fast system we have here by comparison!

I went back to the UK the first week of September to finalize the house sale and for my daughter's graduation and one thing that had me worried was that I might feel homesick (1st visit back). Sadly to say, I didn't one bit. Just felt that the place (Reading) looked really sad, a bit dirty and very overcrowded. By the end of the week I was looking forward to coming home to Virginia. I guess I've got used to a much slower pace of life.

However I won't say that putting down such permenant roots here isn't overwhelming! But being in our 50's and both my husband and I lucky to have jobs here, it makes no sense to uproot and rock the boat. There's no realistic chance of a job in the UK anyways for our age group I feel.

Hope to make some new friends here on this forum - that's one thing I've found difficult about moving here, leaving long time friends with mutual history and trying to make new ones.

Thanks for listening!
Congrats! From my neck of the woods too (I'm from Maidenhead). Everytime I go back I feel it's got a little dingier than it used to be and I actually much prefer living over here to the UK.

Making friends can be tough, I found activities a good way to do it but I also already knew some people over here when I moved (ex-colleagues I was friends with). I joined a footy team and made some of my best friends through that but there are plenty of different groups and activities that may be of interest to you. Just one thought.

Good luck to you!
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 6:52 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Good luck! It sounds as if you've made the right decision. Not everyone adapts so well so quickly.
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 6:56 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Well done on settling so well.

Can't say I blame you, I live a few miles from Reading and it's a bit of a dump, although surrounded by some lovely countryside. I try to avoid it as much as possible and stay out in the sticks!

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Old Sep 26th 2012, 7:04 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Thanks for your replies guys! Yes, Reading never had the greatest reputation but it does have great shopping and Caversham (where I lived, north of the Thames) is pretty in places

If anything, the trip back made me realize how beautiful SW Virginia really is. Back in Reading this time around I didn't enjoy the crowds and the noise - things that didn't ever both me before. Originally a Londoner, I couldn't imaging not living in a big city - but hey ho! here I am living in a small town and enjoying it.

I'm going to take up your suggestions and be a bit more determined about meeting new people. Meetup seems to be a good place to start.
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 7:28 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by treasuredr View Post
Yes, Reading never had the greatest reputation but it does have great shopping and Caversham (where I lived, north of the Thames) is pretty in places
I don't really know Caversham, I think I drove through there once but that's it. I'm like you, prefer the peace and quiet and being surrounded by fields. I live in the Farley Hill/Swallowfield area so very rural, you'd never know we're only 4 miles from Reading!

Enjoy Virginia and good luck making new friends.

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Old Sep 26th 2012, 7:30 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by treasuredr View Post
Thanks for your replies guys! Yes, Reading never had the greatest reputation but it does have great shopping and Caversham (where I lived, north of the Thames) is pretty in places

If anything, the trip back made me realize how beautiful SW Virginia really is. Back in Reading this time around I didn't enjoy the crowds and the noise - things that didn't ever both me before. Originally a Londoner, I couldn't imaging not living in a big city - but hey ho! here I am living in a small town and enjoying it.

I'm going to take up your suggestions and be a bit more determined about meeting new people. Meetup seems to be a good place to start.
First of all Hellooooooo!! Glad that you've settled here, as all too often, we hear of people being very homesick and unsettled, so it's nice to hear that we are all different. My sister-in-law used to live in Reading and I thought it was a rather nice place, but I have to agree with you, when I was home for the first time last Christmas, I definitely noticed how drab and dingy my home town really was, and that everyone either looked totally depressed, or just plain angry and aggressive (nothing to do with the fact that it rained every day we were home ). I'm kind of in the same place as you, but we're not as certain of our future, still waiting on a decision on the H1-b extension and still in the queue for our GC's, so I don't think I'd feel totally settled until all that gets sorted out. Having said that, my whole attitude to life has changed since moving here, with all the stuff we've been through, I now live life one day at a time, make the most of every moment, and relish in the place that I've been blessed enough to live in for the time being.

I hope you do make friends on here, I know I have, even if I've never met them, I feel a bond with certain people who have possibly been through, and understand, what I've gone through since moving and BE is a Godsend to me. I think I'd have been in a loony bin long ago, had it not been for the guys on here.

Good luck for your future in the USA and keep posting
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 7:47 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by Brat1 View Post
First of all Hellooooooo!! Glad that you've settled here, as all too often, we hear of people being very homesick and unsettled, so it's nice to hear that we are all different. My sister-in-law used to live in Reading and I thought it was a rather nice place, but I have to agree with you, when I was home for the first time last Christmas, I definitely noticed how drab and dingy my home town really was, and that everyone either looked totally depressed, or just plain angry and aggressive (nothing to do with the fact that it rained every day we were home ). I'm kind of in the same place as you, but we're not as certain of our future, still waiting on a decision on the H1-b extension and still in the queue for our GC's, so I don't think I'd feel totally settled until all that gets sorted out. Having said that, my whole attitude to life has changed since moving here, with all the stuff we've been through, I now live life one day at a time, make the most of every moment, and relish in the place that I've been blessed enough to live in for the time being.

I hope you do make friends on here, I know I have, even if I've never met them, I feel a bond with certain people who have possibly been through, and understand, what I've gone through since moving and BE is a Godsend to me. I think I'd have been in a loony bin long ago, had it not been for the guys on here.

Good luck for your future in the USA and keep posting

Thanks for your response. I'm happy to know that BE is such a great forum and I'll definitely stick around

I too have read the homesick threads and I really feel for those people - alot of whom seem to have young families and I think that might have a lot to do with it. Having been there and done that - I've not got that to worry about with "children" of 26 and 22 both with careers in the UK. Mum is in her early 70's and still in good health (touch wood) so no worries there at the moment, although I know that this could be an issue in the future.

I think what really helped was knowing that there was no realistic possibility of returning anyway - not if we both need to work, which we do. Hubby is 59 and only 3 years from full retirement package (which he'd be crazy to throw away) and I've been lucky enough to get work at a University in an identical position I had in the UK.

I know what you mean about waiting for GC's. What a nightmare of a system. I only felt secure when I got my 10 year one in June. Naturalization will just be the icing on the cake and eliminate any immigration worries once and for all.

I agree, live life one day at a time and appreciate everything that makes you smile
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 8:16 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

I hope you still sympathise with those of us that still live here! It's definitely a pretty dingy and grey and largely uninspiring town we have here, but being born here you have a certain affinity to it.

Anyways, congrats on the successful move! Homesickness and missing family seem to me to be the only two particular downsides, so glad they aren't huge issues . Good to hear a story of someone who's found it ok settling!
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 8:26 pm
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When I went back to my hometown for the first time, it definitely confirmed to me that my home is now in the states. I have never had culture shock or got homesick, so it was nice to have an emotional response because I never really had one when I moved here.
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 8:51 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

We've been here exactly two years now and have felt homesick on numerous occasions, but when we visited England last year we too realised it is very small, crowded and dirty. Especially in the Midlands where we both grew up, but we do miss the little Somerset villages we last lived in.
This year we were very pleased to purchase our 1st US home and are feeling a lot more settled now.

Our GC process is under way and we hope to have them by this time next year. But I thought you had to have a GC for 5 years before starting the Naturalization/Citizenship process?
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 9:20 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by AddyLaddy View Post
Our GC process is under way and we hope to have them by this time next year. But I thought you had to have a GC for 5 years before starting the Naturalization/Citizenship process?
One assumes the OP came here through marriage to a USC, you only need to be married for 3 yrs to apply for citizenship.
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 10:49 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by AddyLaddy View Post
We've been here exactly two years now and have felt homesick on numerous occasions, but when we visited England last year we too realised it is very small, crowded and dirty. Especially in the Midlands where we both grew up, but we do miss the little Somerset villages we last lived in.
This year we were very pleased to purchase our 1st US home and are feeling a lot more settled now.

Our GC process is under way and we hope to have them by this time next year. But I thought you had to have a GC for 5 years before starting the Naturalization/Citizenship process?
Congratulations on your new home! Yes, I came here through marriage to a US citizen so I was able to apply at the 3 year mark.

I imagine the Somerset villages were beautiful - nothing here I think that compares to the beauty and history of those little villages you find in the UK.
Lived all of my life in big cities - London and Reading but I worked in Henley for many years and Hambleden, just up the road from Henley, was just beautiful!!
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Old Sep 26th 2012, 10:52 pm
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Originally Posted by EnglandToAmerica View Post
I hope you still sympathise with those of us that still live here! It's definitely a pretty dingy and grey and largely uninspiring town we have here, but being born here you have a certain affinity to it.

Anyways, congrats on the successful move! Homesickness and missing family seem to me to be the only two particular downsides, so glad they aren't huge issues . Good to hear a story of someone who's found it ok settling!
I can understand the affinity - I lived in Reading for a large portion of my life and did all of my secondary schooling there. One thing I did enjoy when I went back was Marks & Spencer!!! I wished I could have taken the store back with me
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Old Nov 6th 2012, 11:33 am
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Default Re: Really settled now!

Glad to know you've had a happy ending. I'm a USC who first came to the UK to study abroad at the University of Reading. Some beautiful countryside in the surrounding area.

My husband, a UKC, and I intend to relocate to the States, hopefully next year. We don't know where to move! I have family in Georgia and Texas, but we don't, for various reasons, want to live in either of those places. We fancy North Carolina, but are considering Virginia, too. The area where you are living appeals. We love the mountains and would both like to live somewhere with reasonably mild weather. We know what to expect in the summer: hot and humid. (I grew up in Georgia.) Not sure we can stomach harsh winters, though.

That's great that you and your husband both have jobs. Are you doing work that matches your skills? That's definitely a concern of ours. I understand Virginia has a lower rate of unemployment than North Carolina. Although my husband has IT helpdesk experience, it's not extensive. Do you know whether there are many lower-level vacancies in retail, restaurants, etc in your area? He is prepared to do pretty much whatever he can get! Your advice would be appreciated.
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