Parents back home in blighty
Feb 2nd 2004, 1:42 am
#1
Guest
Posts: n/a
Parents back home in blighty
Originally posted by Taffyles
I'm in a similar position PA- my mum is 73 and not in good health- also she lives on a hill which she can't climb anymore, so has to rely on friends or taxis to go anywhere. She lives in a Welsh mining valley- so all the neighbours look out for each other and help one another BUT it is a huge worry now. I only have a brother and he lives in Brazil and commutes to Africa, so she has no immediate family in the country. We;ve asked her to come and live with us many a time- although gawd knows what we'd do about medical costs/insurance for her. She wants to stay in the valley- she's grown up with her friends there and they have a ton of social events, trips etc She gets bored out of her mind in America. I will probably be changing my job to lower paid agency work just to be able to take time off when I need- I can see plenty of trips over to the UK coming up. I think this is something that comes to many ex-pats eventually- the worry of elderly parents.
I'm in a similar position PA- my mum is 73 and not in good health- also she lives on a hill which she can't climb anymore, so has to rely on friends or taxis to go anywhere. She lives in a Welsh mining valley- so all the neighbours look out for each other and help one another BUT it is a huge worry now. I only have a brother and he lives in Brazil and commutes to Africa, so she has no immediate family in the country. We;ve asked her to come and live with us many a time- although gawd knows what we'd do about medical costs/insurance for her. She wants to stay in the valley- she's grown up with her friends there and they have a ton of social events, trips etc She gets bored out of her mind in America. I will probably be changing my job to lower paid agency work just to be able to take time off when I need- I can see plenty of trips over to the UK coming up. I think this is something that comes to many ex-pats eventually- the worry of elderly parents.
Originally posted by Pulaski
I guess that you're right, and it is now on my agenda too as my parents are getting older and my sister (my only sibling) is just about to leave the UK with her husband as he has just got an offer of a job in France.
I guess that you're right, and it is now on my agenda too as my parents are getting older and my sister (my only sibling) is just about to leave the UK with her husband as he has just got an offer of a job in France.
Originally posted by NC Penguin
For Patent Attorney-
Do you have any siblings in the UK? If so, don't they pull their weight to take care/keep an eye on their mother?
Just a thought...
For Patent Attorney-
Do you have any siblings in the UK? If so, don't they pull their weight to take care/keep an eye on their mother?
Just a thought...
Taffyles > Yes, this issue can be a cause of incredible anxiety. I felt miserably about my mum’s situation and I just had to do something about it. It was keeping me up at night. L At least now we have some closure on the problem, but I now worry about her health and access to medical care. I need to put aside a LOT of money to pay for likely future medical expenses. I was hoping that she would get some Medicare stuff soon as she takes up US citizenship.
Pulaski > Yep, it is sort of “funny-weird� how life catches up with us.
NC Penguin> In my case, my siblings don’t live near my mother. They can’t just drop by and take care of daily things like shopping (she can’t carry loads, has severe back problems and arthritis). She has to rely on taxis and taxi drivers carrying her shopping. It was a very stressful situation; she hates asking people for favors. Always been an active woman bringing loads of shopping home after work and keeping a house clean etc. So this is very hard for her to take. Now she is with me all these issues are essentially moot. I simply do some shopping and get milk etc. on the way home etc. Also, I am company for my mum; I know she greatly appreciates my company. I do need a bigger place now because her furniture arrived a couple of months ago.
Last edited by Patent Attorney; Feb 2nd 2004 at 1:44 am.
Feb 3rd 2004, 2:46 am
#2
.
Joined: Nov 2002
Location: Where bad things rarely happen in movies
Posts: 8,933
I guess a lot of us are in similar boats. My mum turns 70 this year, and while she's still firing on all cylinders, she's not a spring chicken. I was in the Far East when my dad died, and don't really want to be away until its too late with my mum, especially now we have a couple of toddlers that she would love to have around while she's active enough to enjoy them. But the reason we're here is to be close to my wifes parents, so not so easy just to upsticks and move back. And she's not going to move out here because she has a very active life back there, not to mention my 2 sisters living within a mile of her (which is a great comfrot and help, but at the back of my mind there is still a nagging tought that I shoudl be closer, especially now my dads gone). Bit of a dilemma, but I made the bed so....
Anyway, to get back to the point I came on for - I remember reading somewhere recently about a 'safety net' for people that were struggling to get insurance (medical?) - I didn't take too much notice as it wasn't really relevant, but it went by some acronym like FAIR or somesuch - Fair Access to Insurance Requirements or something like that. I've no idea whether it was a State program or Federal, but may be worth asking someone who knows more than I do...
Anyway, to get back to the point I came on for - I remember reading somewhere recently about a 'safety net' for people that were struggling to get insurance (medical?) - I didn't take too much notice as it wasn't really relevant, but it went by some acronym like FAIR or somesuch - Fair Access to Insurance Requirements or something like that. I've no idea whether it was a State program or Federal, but may be worth asking someone who knows more than I do...
