Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

In our case we agreed to a GAL to do the home visits, though we did have to pay for it, rather than the courts/government. If I'd refused to voluntarily have the GAL, it would have looked very bad.

Has your stepdaughter's mother refused a GAL? There's also taking the child to a psychologist or psychiatrist for evaluation. Does your husband have the legal right to do so without the mother's permission? or with, and has he asked?

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

We did. We run into the problem here of separate counties etc... The county where we live in did our assessment and we both had to talk to social workers etc.. they came to the house, interviewed us, saw her room, looked in closets etc etc... The social worker had reviewed the case from the last year, and all the litigation and the report was very favorable toward us. However, it was not the same DCS division that was doing the report at her mother's home. The people here already warned us that she lived in a very small (and backward town) and referred to "home cooking" which confused me at first.. then my husband explained she meant they all stick together, attorneys, judges, childrens services etc...

The mother now lives in a single wide trailer with no windows (she moved in with the b/f before marrying him), my step daughter's bedroom is a closet, she refused court ordered drug testing for 3 months (the magic period) before complying, has a history of reckless driving etc etc.. yet they found her to be competent and she works in a daycare - how scary is that!!

I think we have accepted we have exhausted pretty much everything we can do.. according to what attys have told us anyway. We just try to give her as much love and attention as we can when she is with us, and explain things as best we can (she is very confused) all we can do is hope that we can have some kind of influence as she grows. Until she goes to school the 1 week per month will be doable, but after that, who knows...

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

She did not refuse the GAL, the Judge did. It was in our petition to the court that a GAL be appointed. The judge said no, and he only used those in child abuse cases. :confused:

As for taking her to a psychologist, the PPP says that they have to make all medical decisions jointly.

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

Often if you do some of the things the mother and step-father can't be arsed with, they won't mind.... if they need a babysitter, or if there's a birthday party to be paid for.... sometimes you have to do all you can and pray. As she grows older, she will start to assert herself and show preferences. School is good, because even if a community sticks together, there will be social pressures on the mother to make sure the girl is ready for school.... eg has been fed, bathed, clothed, had a decent sleep, and the like. Sometimes if the mother feels less attacked, she may be more likely to allow you and your husband to do more. As time goes on, I feel far more comfortable co-parenting and cooperating with my ex, since the odds of him taking me back to court are smaller. If the combative atmosphere can calm a bit, she may cooperate more.

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

There has to be a tiebreaker clause, though. What is it in your case? In ours it's fairly complicated but there is one.

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

why does she live in a trailer when her now husband makes $100k?

Often retired strippers with crack habits end up in daycare - very scary

What court are you in?

Juvenuile, Circuit or chancery?

We have a lot of contacts both in the judiciary and legal profession who may be able to offer guidance

please tell me by PM the Judges name you went before....

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

In most states, if a report of abuse or neglect is reported ( even anonymously) to DSS, the department is required to send an assessment worker to investigate within 24 - 49 hours. Much much sooner if the situation is life threatening. The Tennessee number for such a report is http://www.state.tn.us/youth/

Then the assessment worker decides if the child should be EPC'd and a Probably Cause hearing is set within 72 hours. If the Judge finds there to be probable cause in our county a GAL ( such as myself) is assigned the case.

Usually custody cases involve a GAL who is not a volunteer but is paid. I didn't think you needed a judge's permission to employ someone who's profession it is to recommend what is in the best interest of the child.

I think the Judge may have erred and would follow up on that if I were you. Also, if you feel the county DSS where the child resides is not properly reporting a home study you should take it up with the State Office of DSS.

I feel so badly for all of you in this horrible mess. Good luck.

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

You don't need the judge's permission; you merely need each other's permission (and if you still have attorneys, they may have strong recommendations on the issue).

Re: Litigation / Lawyers in the USA / Some Thoughts!
 

:confused: Thanks guys! I have PM'd you the info....

As for the trailer part - who knows it blows our mind - he lived in a very nice condo prior to their marriage and then sold that and moved into the trailer. :confused: