Joint Accounts
#31
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by BritGuyTN
joint accounts are beneficial for tax purposes is one partner dies.
I think the term is 'rights of survivorship' or something.
I think the term is 'rights of survivorship' or something.
Often in second marriages, a spouse may want his/her money to go to grown children rather than the other spouse. Fine, but that should all be up front. If there's an agreement that something is to go to the spouse, it should be in both names as well as IN A WILL.
#32
Re: Joint Accounts
I have my own checking account, which I added Sadegh to. I have my own savings account which I did not add Sadegh to. Sadegh has his own checking account, which he added me to. I also have another savings account through work, which Sadegh is not added to. I have 2 credit cards which I added Sadegh to, he has 2 credit cards that I am not added to.
We both earn income. My income goes into my checking account. His income goes into his checking account. The household bills are paid out of my checking account. He pays his own cell phone and credit card bills. Pretty much everything he spends money on is business related, so he pays for all of that from his checking account.
It's kind of interesting that our money is "his or hers" when it suits us better, or "ours" when it suits us better. I have to say though, he's never asked me to do anything differently with my own money than I did before he came here, and I haven't asked him to, either. I save or spend as I wish, and he does the same....we're not into each other's spending habits at all.
Something sounds fishy to me, Sibs. Even if it's innocent, his method is too demanding!
HUGS,
Rene
We both earn income. My income goes into my checking account. His income goes into his checking account. The household bills are paid out of my checking account. He pays his own cell phone and credit card bills. Pretty much everything he spends money on is business related, so he pays for all of that from his checking account.
It's kind of interesting that our money is "his or hers" when it suits us better, or "ours" when it suits us better. I have to say though, he's never asked me to do anything differently with my own money than I did before he came here, and I haven't asked him to, either. I save or spend as I wish, and he does the same....we're not into each other's spending habits at all.
Something sounds fishy to me, Sibs. Even if it's innocent, his method is too demanding!
HUGS,
Rene
#33
Return of bouncing girl!
Joined: Sep 2004
Location: The Fourth Reich
Posts: 4,931
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by sibsie
Long story cut short. Before we married and before I moved over here he told me that his place was totally unsuitable. It's his house, in his name and he owns it outright but his mother and her husband also live in it. His mother has emphasema (sp?) and had signed the house over to him five years previously to avoid the Mass Medicare taking the house if and when she went into a care home.
He'd made a basement apartment but he was adamant that it was too small for two people. So I found us a place to rent and I paid the rent for it. When the lease was up he said that the basement apartment was fine and off we went to it with me kicking and screaming in protest.
He'd made a basement apartment but he was adamant that it was too small for two people. So I found us a place to rent and I paid the rent for it. When the lease was up he said that the basement apartment was fine and off we went to it with me kicking and screaming in protest.
I'm really sorry to say this, Sibsie - him being your husband and all - but this stinks to high heaven. Seriously. How honest are you both about your money? Do you know how much he earns and precisely what assets he has? Have you seen evidence of these assets? Do you know how to access them, should anything happen to him?
I'm just concerned that he's so adamant that your money gets signed over into his name. It seems to me like if you do that, you won't see the money again. Is it possible that he has debts you don't know about?
#34
C.G.D.S
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Ireland--->London--->Spain--->Rockport, MA
Posts: 3,353
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by Wintersong
How honest are you both about your money? Do you know how much he earns and precisely what assets he has? Have you seen evidence of these assets? Do you know how to access them, should anything happen to him?
He knows how much I have left but it's dwindling as I've had to dip into it. I was thinking about taking it out of Euros and putting it in £s when I go back to England in Sept.
For day to day finances I pay for my own stuff. I have two horses which I pay for entirely and never ask him for money, though his own income is far in excess of mine. I've helped him out financially when's he asked for it and paid a few $k to him for tax arrears earlier this year.
#35
Return of bouncing girl!
Joined: Sep 2004
Location: The Fourth Reich
Posts: 4,931
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by sibsie
Well asset wise it's all a bit tricky. As far as I know, without seeing a lawyer, the house is nothing to do with me. It's an irrevokable trust and I don't have life tenancy or anything. He said it would cost too much to change the trust though he's away all week so I'll be doing some sneaky photocopying. I know how much he makes and apparently I'm a beneficiary on his life insurance but I've never seen anything stating that. The boat is worth about $100k and is in his mother's name. Not sure why, but he said it's too complicated to re-document it. I'd have thought that if her house went to him to make sure it can't get taken by Medicare, then he'd sure as hell want to make sure his boat was safe.
He knows how much I have left but it's dwindling as I've had to dip into it. I was thinking about taking it out of Euros and putting it in £s when I go back to England in Sept.
For day to day finances I pay for my own stuff. I have two horses which I pay for entirely and never ask him for money, though his own income is far in excess of mine. I've helped him out financially when's he asked for it and paid a few $k to him for tax arrears earlier this year.
He knows how much I have left but it's dwindling as I've had to dip into it. I was thinking about taking it out of Euros and putting it in £s when I go back to England in Sept.
For day to day finances I pay for my own stuff. I have two horses which I pay for entirely and never ask him for money, though his own income is far in excess of mine. I've helped him out financially when's he asked for it and paid a few $k to him for tax arrears earlier this year.
Wouldn't Medicare be far more likely to take someone's luxury boat rather than the roof over their heads? Something about this story, and the fact that he keeps making excuses not to put your name on anything, just doesn't add up. I don't buy his "it's too complicated" excuse - all it would need is a lawyer to draw up the necessary papers and for all parties to sign them.
The bottom line: don't sign your savings over to him. It would be madness. I'd also be insisting to him that you open a joint account for household expenses and both pay your salaries into it each month, then open a joint savings account and transfer some of the money each month into that. If that doesn't satisfy his "proper marriage" requirements, then he has an ulterior motive.
#36
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by Wintersong
Wouldn't Medicare be far more likely to take someone's luxury boat rather than the roof over their heads? Something about this story, and the fact that he keeps making excuses not to put your name on anything, just doesn't add up. I don't buy his "it's too complicated" excuse - all it would need is a lawyer to draw up the necessary papers and for all parties to sign them.
Have you seen a copy of your joint credit report, Sibsie?
Again, I think consulting an accountant would be a wise move. I would NOT move the money over.
If your husband is more worried about his mother's financial state vs yours, he ain't your husband.
#37
Mr. Grumpy
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 3,100
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by snowbunny
Yes, they'd be more likely to take a luxury boat, but if someone needs to go into a nursing home, Medicare will force a sale of their residence.*** (this is a generalisation)
Have you seen a copy of your joint credit report, Sibsie?
Again, I think consulting an accountant would be a wise move. I would NOT move the money over.
If your husband is more worried about his mother's financial state vs yours, he ain't your husband.
Have you seen a copy of your joint credit report, Sibsie?
Again, I think consulting an accountant would be a wise move. I would NOT move the money over.
If your husband is more worried about his mother's financial state vs yours, he ain't your husband.
#38
C.G.D.S
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Ireland--->London--->Spain--->Rockport, MA
Posts: 3,353
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by Wintersong
The bottom line: don't sign your savings over to him. It would be madness. I'd also be insisting to him that you open a joint account for household expenses and both pay your salaries into it each month, then open a joint savings account and transfer some of the money each month into that. If that doesn't satisfy his "proper marriage" requirements, then he has an ulterior motive.
He won't go for me asking for joint accounts unless I've already brought my money over here and that was the initial pitch I used.
I really need to get a copy of the trust and his other stuff and take it into a decent lawyer so I know where I stand.
#39
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by sibsie
He wants the house to stay in his name along with all his assets. He said if I bring my money over then we have have a joint current account which I'm not especially keen on as he's a bit of a control freak. Things aren't especially fantastic so I want my money as emergency exit money if needs be. He reckons we don't have a "proper" marriage until I've done it so I'm under quite a bit of pressure
What is it about american men and control?
#40
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by BritGuyTN
There's no such thing as a joint credit report...... correct me if i'm wrong
Think she meant both your credit reports. There is no such thing as a joint one.
#41
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by sibsie
He wants the house to stay in his name along with all his assets. He said if I bring my money over then we have have a joint current account which I'm not especially keen on as he's a bit of a control freak. Things aren't especially fantastic so I want my money as emergency exit money if needs be. He reckons we don't have a "proper" marriage until I've done it so I'm under quite a bit of pressure
Come on gal use those old copper instincts...what are they saying to you?
#42
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by fatbrit
Think she meant both your credit reports. There is no such thing as a joint one.
NC Penguin
#43
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by NC Penguin
Surely Sibsie wouldn't be able to get a copy of her husband's credit report?
NC Penguin
NC Penguin
She's a woman, isn't she?
#44
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: Joint Accounts
Actually Sibsie - and I know its your marriage and everything - but after reading more of what you have said I would personally NOT let him have any more money, go see a lawyer immediately and get on the next boat away from him.
Does he have a secret gambling problem? My wifes ex did and it cost thousands. He kept tapping her for money every know and again making some bollox up about tax or whatever. In the end she found he was pissing something like 80k a year on the horses. He was a control freak as well.
Does he have a secret gambling problem? My wifes ex did and it cost thousands. He kept tapping her for money every know and again making some bollox up about tax or whatever. In the end she found he was pissing something like 80k a year on the horses. He was a control freak as well.
#45
C.G.D.S
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Ireland--->London--->Spain--->Rockport, MA
Posts: 3,353
Re: Joint Accounts
Originally Posted by ImHere
Does he have a secret gambling problem? My wifes ex did and it cost thousands. He kept tapping her for money every know and again making some bollox up about tax or whatever. In the end she found he was pissing something like 80k a year on the horses. He was a control freak as well.
The money thing I can probably fend off a while longer, but having to fold his bathtowel in a certain way, clean everything with an SOS pad (WTF) and be ready for baseboard inspection when he walks in, isn't something I can fend off long term. I so wish I was exaggerating.