How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Hi. I have been in LA a month after badgering my husband to take up a job here. We have sold up everything in England. I was the one who really wanted to come, but now we have arrived I suddenly feel extremely homesick and anxious! I am trying to get more involved with school activities (my children are 9 and 12). Any thoughts and tips would be greatly appreciated.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Can take a day, a month, a week, a year, a lifetime. It all depends on how much you want to get involved with the US.

The US more than most places is what you make it.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

It generally takes folk about 2 years to feel settled into their new home, so what you are feeling is normal. It takes time to adapt to a new environment, but you'll soon settle in I'm sure.

:):)

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

How long is a piece of string? There's no single answer to your question.

It really, really depends on the individual and their situation. For me, when I was (ahem!) younger and moved to the Bahamas I settled instantly. But that was partly due to my different outlook on life back then and the fact that for me, at the time, the Bahamas was like paradise and the lifestyle made life in the UK look like drudgery in comparison.

In the several moves I've made since then the answer has ranged from a couple of months to over a year. It's been influenced by the fact that as I've got older moving around agrees less with me, and also by the specifics of the situation. I've tended to settle more quickly when I've lived in my own home than when I've rented.

I've been lucky enough to have had a job each time also; I'm sure that if I'd been unemployed it would have been a much longer time.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

I agree, everyone is different. It took me about eighteen months, but that is only a couple of months longer than it took to buy a house. Part of the delay was because we were unable to see our house in London for more than six months, and partly because we moved twice after arriving in New York. We left our rented apartment after eight months, and moved to a house belonging to my in-laws. Six months later I found a new, much more agreeable job, and found a house two months later. Feeling settled followed very shortly after that! :)

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

I lived in LA for a year and never got settled. I hate that place, what a total and utter craphole. It gave me my first mental breakdown and it should be flattened then burned.

My advice is to try and avoid driving and dealing with the fake self obsessed locals! Do all you can to maintain your sanity and cross your fingers!

Good luck

Paul

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Thanks for the replies. I admit the driving is definitely one of my hang-ups, which I am trying to get over as I will feel more relaxed if I can. Does anybody out there like LA?

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Yep, I like LA... I'm just glad I don't live there ;)

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

If you are willing to risk the drive you should check out Electric Karma on 3rd Street, down near Cedars-Sinai as the food is amazing (Indian but owned by a Frenchman), further down the road in Santa Monica is The Kings Head (http://www.yeoldekingshead.com/newsite/home.htm )which is the usual US attempt at a 'British Pub' but it's better than the endless sports bars or overpriced poser hang-outs. In Pasadena I really reccomend the Yard House ( http://www.yardhouse.com/default.asp ) for a nice meal/drinking session. In Glendale you should check out Portos Bakery ( http://www.portosbakery.com )

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Everyone differs on this and there is no set guide. It took me until I got settled into a full time job to feel apart of my new home.

Just don't let the homesickness let you make any quick decisions on giving up. I felt like it a number of times but stuck it out. I'm glad I did.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

I have been here 14months and still have days when i feel homesick, i too have children who are 10 & 12 and it took me a little while to get involved in school things but i'm glad i did, i'm just now starting to feel anywhere near comfortable going into school but more and more people are starting to make conversation and invite me to things, it is really hard, but it seems to get easier, the good thing for me is i read this board every day and know that these are normal feelings.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Thanks, it is good to know that things should get easier and as you say very helpful to hear of other people's experiences.

By the way, my husband is a "Geordie boy".

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

So much depends on your attitude, if you dwell on the things that you miss from home, and the things that you don't like here, you'll never make it. If you set out to find things to like it helps a great deal.

Something to understand, a lot of Americans are intimidated by a British accent and you will find it difficult to distinguish it from dislike for you. Your best way in is through the children and their schools, and school activities. My wife knew half the township before I had a beer and a natter with a neighbour.

Good luck.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

Look for Eskimo, Woodsey, and Lionheart, to name a few, who live in the area.

Re: How long does it take to feel settled?
 

She's homesick, not psychotic ;) :D