How do I know Im back in Blighty?
#1
How do I know Im back in Blighty?
...I can hear the rag n bone man crying out "Ragbone" coming up our street.
O to be in England...
O to be in England...
#2
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Don't forget that suddenly every inch of pavement wherever you go will be spattered in dog shit. It almost seems as if the local council has hired a man to wander the night chucking it all over the place.
#3
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Oh that joy is yet to come!!! only been away 3 months so nowts changed - except maybe me feeling like America is becoming home...
#8
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2004
Location: CHELTENHAM, Gloucestershire, England
Posts: 1,494
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
So all those hired local council men have plenty of work to keep them fully employed - one night spent wandering around slinging dog muck hither and thither and gobbing out spent chewing gum at the same time and then the following night clearing it all up again before a re-run the following night and so on and so on, and ably aided by the local neds and nedessed and chavs and chavettes and dog walkers of both genders all at the same time, not forgetting all the after-closing-time pissheads of both genders chucking all their empty take-away curry containers plus added vomit left right and centre just to add further flavour to the fun. Britain at its finest!
#9
Peace onion
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Denver
Posts: 5,686
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
You are so uncouth. I would recommend finding a finishing school. There are many in your area.
#10
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Britain - where Hyacinth Bucket and Vicky Pollard are neighbours.
#11
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Not any more - Dave Cameron had all the poo-spreaders made redundant along with the librarians and care workers as part of his "big society" program. Might explain why I only saw two dog turds during my recent trip to London (and I was keeping an eye out for them).
#12
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Mind you I don't think this country is in much better shape.
#13
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Things that drove me completely insane on my most recent trip back to the UK:
Dog poop
Gum on pavement
Traffic, traffic and more traffic
The smell of pee when walking past bus shelters etc.
The rain (it rained for 12 days out of 14)
The miserable faces on the shop assistants
Crap hotel/pub food
Having to pay to park everywhere you go
I think that's about it...rant over
Dog poop
Gum on pavement
Traffic, traffic and more traffic
The smell of pee when walking past bus shelters etc.
The rain (it rained for 12 days out of 14)
The miserable faces on the shop assistants
Crap hotel/pub food
Having to pay to park everywhere you go
I think that's about it...rant over
#14
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
sorry to continue taking this thread off-topic ... at least there are pavements, pubs and public transport - hence the bus shelters. Here you have to take your life in your hands and walk down the road and hope not to be hit by some outsize SUV.
By the way, if you want dog poop everywhere - go to Paris - filthy city!
By the way, if you want dog poop everywhere - go to Paris - filthy city!
#15
Re: How do I know Im back in Blighty?
Per my ex-pat husband: Taxi drivers who know where they're goin' People who understand what you're saying when you speak to them nobody saying "you're not from around here, are ya'?" and the sound of a milk float going by in the early hours of the morning with the clinking of bottles. Always knew that nothing drastic had happened overnight and the world was still in one piece. Hearing the announcement that the "train is delayed" due to "the wrong type of snow" or leaves on the line or the late running of a previous service! The curse of the final bell at closing time - the smell of diesel fuel mixed with the scent of rape seed in bloom in the spring. And being told there's an 8-12 week wait for your new 3 piece suite.