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-   -   Homecoming Dance (https://britishexpats.com/forum/usa-57/homecoming-dance-485781/)

Sally Oct 7th 2007 3:53 am

Homecoming Dance
 
Is there any special etiquette attached to them for a Freshman boy?? I have only the vaguest idea about them from movies, which usually involve a gruesome murder.
Thanks.

Patrick Hasler Oct 7th 2007 1:07 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Sally (Post 5396249)
Is there any special etiquette attached to them for a Freshman boy?? I have only the vaguest idea about them from movies, which usually involve a gruesome murder.
Thanks.

You've gone and changed your avitar :mad: ............. You don't look like Stevie Wonder anymore :(

tamms_1965 Oct 7th 2007 1:17 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Sally (Post 5396249)
Is there any special etiquette attached to them for a Freshman boy?? I have only the vaguest idea about them from movies, which usually involve a gruesome murder.
Thanks.

It dependson the regional traditions. In Ohio, they are usually semi-formal/dressy casual. Sometimes the boy gets the girl a corsage, sometimes not. At the school I teach, a student group sells carnations and roses the week before homecoming with them being delivered the Friday before. So many times, the boys (and girls) will send a flower that way. It is much more relaxed than the prom in the spring.

scrubbedexpat097 Oct 7th 2007 2:05 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 
It is a lot more casual here than the prom. It seems that the girls like the boys to buy them a homecoming "mum" with all the bells and whistles on it. (and are usually IMO ugly!)

My daughter went to all her high school homecoming dances but my son wasn't into it at all.


http://mumsrus.tripod.com/sitebuilde...g.w300h842.jpg

jumping doris Oct 7th 2007 4:24 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Sally (Post 5396249)
Is there any special etiquette attached to them for a Freshman boy?? I have only the vaguest idea about them from movies, which usually involve a gruesome murder.
Thanks.

It was our homecoming dance last night.
This is what happens here:

Boy asks girl to be his date.
Assuming she says yes.....

He asks what colour dress she will be wearing and buys a corsage in that colour. Usually here it is a wrist corsage.
Sometimes the corsage comes with a buttonhole for him (called a buttoniere here) sometimes it doesn't so you need to check that.

Generally here the girl would buy the buttonhole seperately.

Homecoming is very formal here and the girls wear long dresses (although this year there were a few short ones) and the boys wear suits and ties. The boy will ususally match his tie to the colour of the girls dress.

They usually arrange to go to homecoming with a group of friends and they all get together at someones house for photo's first and parents go to that.
We hosted the photos yesterday and so we provided beer, wine, soda and nibbles etc.

Then they all go off for dinner and the boy pays.
Then it's on to the dance followed by the after party at someone elses house.

In January we have the Sadie Hawkins dance and then the girls ask the boys and pay for dinner. That too is very formal here and the girls wear short cocktail dresses but in other areas Sadies is much more informal.

It is quite an education!

scrubbedexpat097 Oct 7th 2007 4:30 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by jumping doris (Post 5397896)
It was our homecoming dance last night.
This is what happens here:

Boy asks girl to be his date.
Assuming she says yes.....

He asks what colour dress she will be wearing and buys a corsage in that colour. Usually here it is a wrist corsage.
Sometimes the corsage comes with a buttonhole for him (called a buttoniere here) sometimes it doesn't so you need to check that.

Generally here the girl would buy the buttonhole seperately.

Homecoming is very formal here and the girls wear long dresses (although this year there were a few short ones) and the boys wear suits and ties. The boy will ususally match his tie to the colour of the girls dress.

They usually arrange to go to homecoming with a group of friends and they all get together at someones house for photo's first and parents go to that.
We hosted the photos yesterday and so we provided beer, wine, soda and nibbles etc.

Then they all go off for dinner and the boy pays.
Then it's on to the dance followed by the after party at someone elses house.

In January we have the Sadie Hawkins dance and then the girls ask the boys and pay for dinner. That too is very formal here and the girls wear short cocktail dresses but in other areas Sadies is much more informal.

It is quite an education!


We are just so tacky and common here in our little redneck community:rofl:

jumping doris Oct 7th 2007 4:37 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Sugarmooma (Post 5397908)
We are just so tacky and common here in our little redneck community:rofl:

I was utterly amazed at the senior prom here. My daughter graduated this summer and so we went to see the teenagers arriving at the hotel.
They had a red carpet, limos and dresses to die for. They all took it in turns to get out of their cars and walk up the red carpet. The principal was waiting for them at the top with some of the school board members. All the parents were lining the red carpet ...it was like the oscars!!!!!

I want to go and I want a big frock.:rofl:

penguinsix Oct 7th 2007 4:59 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 
It all depends on your school. In today's terms, our homecoming dance was business formal and our prom was black-tie formal. Our Sadie Hawkins dance was jeans and socks (technically a 'sock hop' because they have it on the gym floor and don't want you to scuff things up) but at my school it was called a 'Mr. Irresistible' dance.

As I didn't get asked, three other Star Trek fans and I formed a one-night club called 'The Resistibles' and just ended up at the video arcade playing Asteroids until the end of the evening. :(:(

Elvira Oct 7th 2007 5:34 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by jumping doris (Post 5397919)
I was utterly amazed at the senior prom here. My daughter graduated this summer and so we went to see the teenagers arriving at the hotel.
They had a red carpet, limos and dresses to die for. They all took it in turns to get out of their cars and walk up the red carpet. The principal was waiting for them at the top with some of the school board members. All the parents were lining the red carpet ...it was like the oscars!!!!!

I want to go and I want a big frock.:rofl:

Am I the only one who thinks this completely OTT and ridiculous? :blink:

Thank god my lot refused to participate in any of this nonsense...

Why can't they just have a proper party?

jumping doris Oct 7th 2007 6:07 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Elvira (Post 5398063)
Am I the only one who thinks this completely OTT and ridiculous? :blink:

Thank god my lot refused to participate in any of this nonsense...

Why can't they just have a proper party?

My eldest didn't really become part of it. She went to one homecoming and her senior prom and that was fine. Her group did it all in a very low key way.

My middle one loves it all!!!

I don't mind because we brought them here to make a new life and for her that's part of it.

Elvira Oct 7th 2007 6:27 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by jumping doris (Post 5398155)
My eldest didn't really become part of it. She went to one homecoming and her senior prom and that was fine. Her group did it all in a very low key way.

My middle one loves it all!!!

I don't mind because we brought them here to make a new life and for her that's part of it.

It may be considered part of life here, but I have - on other forums - seen mothers completely stressed out by everything that is associated with these Prom style events. Not just the actual organising of it all, but the cost. Some parents get into serious dept just to make sure their kids (and let's remember they are just kids!!) wear the right clothes and have a 'proper' limo to take them to a 'decent' restaurant.

Frankly I don't see the point.......... why should parents have to be bullied into keeping up with the Joneses and possibly getting into debt as a result...

My sons went to impromptu parties on the nights of their proms, and I for one am sure they had a much better time than those who conformed with expectations.

penguinsix Oct 7th 2007 6:33 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Elvira (Post 5398204)
My sons went to impromptu parties on the nights of their proms, and I for one am sure they had a much better time than those who conformed with expectations.

I went to see Star Trek Wrath of Khan the night of my prom. Yet another reason I also failed to attend the Mr. Irresistible dane...

jumping doris Oct 7th 2007 8:53 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by Elvira (Post 5398204)
It may be considered part of life here, but I have - on other forums - seen mothers completely stressed out by everything that is associated with these Prom style events. Not just the actual organising of it all, but the cost. Some parents get into serious dept just to make sure their kids (and let's remember they are just kids!!) wear the right clothes and have a 'proper' limo to take them to a 'decent' restaurant.

Frankly I don't see the point.......... why should parents have to be bullied into keeping up with the Joneses and possibly getting into debt as a result...

My sons went to impromptu parties on the nights of their proms, and I for one am sure they had a much better time than those who conformed with expectations.

I suppose thats where being British helps. We join in but refuse to go the whole hog. Mind you my daughters school in the UK had a prom and that was becoming a fairly big affair.

We always buy the frock in the sale..this year it cost $14, same for shoes and they do their own hair and make up.
The middle one has her nails done but thats probably the biggest expense.
No-one in my daughters group of friends goes way over the top although I have seen some others making a fuss over not getting their own way.

The senior prom is a bit more lavish than homecoming or Sadies.

I still want to go, though. And I want a big frock.

Kaffy Mintcake Oct 7th 2007 10:09 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by jumping doris (Post 5397896)
It was our homecoming dance last night.
This is what happens here:

Boy asks girl to be his date.
Assuming she says yes.....

He asks what colour dress she will be wearing and buys a corsage in that colour. Usually here it is a wrist corsage.
Sometimes the corsage comes with a buttonhole for him (called a buttoniere here) sometimes it doesn't so you need to check that.

Generally here the girl would buy the buttonhole seperately.

Homecoming is very formal here and the girls wear long dresses (although this year there were a few short ones) and the boys wear suits and ties. The boy will ususally match his tie to the colour of the girls dress.

They usually arrange to go to homecoming with a group of friends and they all get together at someones house for photo's first and parents go to that.
We hosted the photos yesterday and so we provided beer, wine, soda and nibbles etc.

Then they all go off for dinner and the boy pays.
Then it's on to the dance followed by the after party at someone elses house.

In January we have the Sadie Hawkins dance and then the girls ask the boys and pay for dinner. That too is very formal here and the girls wear short cocktail dresses but in other areas Sadies is much more informal.

It is quite an education!

What you described is exactly what went on in my school. We had "Homecoming" in the fall and "Coming Home" (get it reversed? not that funny) in the spring. The only real difference between the two was who asked who. (Homecoming = boys ask, Cominghome = girls ask)

The prom is reserved for seniors generally, though they may choose to ask an underclassmen to go with them. Homecoming and Sadie Hawkins, etc. are for all students.

Sounds like a pretty good description to me - generally formal dress - a smidge less so than the prom, but not by too much.

Kaffy Mintcake Oct 7th 2007 10:11 pm

Re: Homecoming Dance
 

Originally Posted by jumping doris (Post 5398729)
I suppose thats where being British helps. We join in but refuse to go the whole hog. Mind you my daughters school in the UK had a prom and that was becoming a fairly big affair.

We always buy the frock in the sale..this year it cost $14, same for shoes and they do their own hair and make up.
The middle one has her nails done but thats probably the biggest expense.
No-one in my daughters group of friends goes way over the top although I have seen some others making a fuss over not getting their own way.

The senior prom is a bit more lavish than homecoming or Sadies.

I still want to go, though. And I want a big frock.

I agree with Doris - that's the fault of the parents if they are going into debt over a kid's dance. Stupid really. Whatever happened to a budget? My mother made a couple of my dresses for these occasions - and you can typically buy something on sale. Heck, I spent $200 on my wedding dress, and I like it!

The dances are a major tradition. It would be a shame to see them go away, but not everyone needs to participate, and they certainly shouldn't bankrupt anyone.


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