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-   -   Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed (https://britishexpats.com/forum/usa-57/hi-advice-h4-visa-ca-irvine-life-needed-695822/)

Sally Redux Dec 8th 2010 12:13 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by meauxna (Post 9026637)
To be fair, the OP was sort of baited with the 'why do you think it's better' question and because she gave one handful of reasons, it's suggested that she move within the UK. She doesn't want to move away from where she is (not until she was prompted to say so). She wants to move to California, where they have a job offer.
The reasons offered are likely not the only considerations.

Everyone needs to go through their own story arc. Some of the experiences here haven't been happy.. fine, you made your point, but why the need to convince someone else that that will be right for them too? Every family is a little different.

The way *I* would do it is to review a number of relocation and lifestyle threads over a period of time, to get an aggregate idea on the 'reality' factor of a stay at home H-4. Seems to me that would be the more difficult thing to deal with than 'can't find suet at the grocery'.

Just another perspective, and not directed at any one.

Fair point, I actually don't like to reply to these sort of threads because I am aware of my negativity. However, I do think the OP needs to be careful of a few elephant traps that people moving here can easily fall into, eg it's sunny and cheap so we'll be happy all the time.

N1cky Dec 8th 2010 12:27 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by Sally Redux (Post 9027438)
Fair point, I actually don't like to reply to these sort of threads because I am aware of my negativity. However, I do think the OP needs to be careful of a few elephant traps that people moving here can easily fall into, eg it's sunny and cheap so we'll be happy all the time.

Your experience only counts if it's a positive one:p

Sally Redux Dec 8th 2010 12:33 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by N1cky (Post 9027460)
Your experience only counts if it's a positive one:p

'Positive reinforcement wanted for my plan' would be a fairer title, we wouldn't waste our valuable time and could get back to the beach :lol:

meauxna Dec 8th 2010 12:42 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by N1cky (Post 9027460)
Your experience only counts if it's a positive one:p


Originally Posted by Sally Redux (Post 9027470)
'Positive reinforcement wanted for my plan' would be a fairer title, we wouldn't waste our valuable time and could get back to the beach :lol:

Tut tut, unfair, ladies. And untrue.
Now off to your high falutin' spa appointments please. :)

Serene1 Dec 8th 2010 9:31 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 
Hi, its not true that I am not condidering the kind advice of people that have posted. Infact - the replies have helped me to assess our situation financially in the past few days with much more scrutiny - now that I have a better picture of the expense of living out there re. health insurance rents, taxes etc.
Also, brought home the likely hood of being a stay at home mum - for longer than I would have planned to - and the consequences of the loss of an income vs living costs.
Also, the impact on the kids education - generally get the impression they are a year behind UK schools.
I have visited California many times on holidays - so of course that is the only perspective i have - doesn't mean im not thinking clearly.
I have posted on here to get a clearer understanding of the realitites of moving and life in the USA - before i decide whether or not to do it.
That is the whole point.

I can understand how it can seem that i am not wanting to hear anything 'bad' about making the move; totally not true. Like i said - its all being taken on board and has taken our decision process to a deeper level.
And im sad to say - am wondering whether its even worth it any more - as all i really want to do all day long in life - is walk in the sun/lie on a beach??:lol:
Totally appreciate the time people have taken to reply.
Many thanx.

Serene1 Dec 8th 2010 10:03 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 
Another point - i have been reading other peoples threads on here - where its not all worked out so well!! And its very sad! I wouldnt want to put my children or my family in a bad situation.
I guess i have thought as both my OH and myself have a decent education and professions - we would be ok - if we moved. But I can see that there are no guarantees that even a good education will help in the times of today!

And sometimes i do think that there isnt any sense in throwing away a good standard of living in the UK - for a possibility of facing initial financial uncertainty in the US. Its a fear that ive always had - that it could all go wrong - OH doesnt like job, kids dont like school, no friends, i dont find work, end up in a tiny little appartment cramped up with the kids????
See i can be very negative if i want to - just try not to be!
I have known of families that have moved to CA - albeit a long time ago - 20+ years and they cant find a bad thing to say abt their lives there and they wouldnt come back here for the world! So, I have that perspective too - that if you work hard, earn a decent living and if you can surive the change - that it can be a great place to live.

Think i will take a break from here for a while - do my sums and do some soul searching!
Have to accept or decline the job offered to my hubby NEXT WEEK!!!

Sincere thanks to everyone for all comments and ill let you know what happens!

S.

christmasoompa Dec 8th 2010 10:25 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by Serene1 (Post 9028261)
Think i will take a break from here for a while - do my sums and do some soul searching!
Have to accept or decline the job offered to my hubby NEXT WEEK!!!

One thing that may be helpful, is if you let everybody know what salary/package your hubby has been offered and what kind of lifestyle you'd want (i.e. size of house/car(s) etc) then people who live in that area may be able to tell you if it's a reasonable offer and if you would be ok financially or not? That may help your decision a bit perhaps?

Good luck with the decision!

Serene1 Dec 8th 2010 11:10 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by christmasoompa (Post 9028295)
One thing that may be helpful, is if you let everybody know what salary/package your hubby has been offered and what kind of lifestyle you'd want (i.e. size of house/car(s) etc) then people who live in that area may be able to tell you if it's a reasonable offer and if you would be ok financially or not? That may help your decision a bit perhaps?

Good luck with the decision!

Thankyou - seems like a good idea!
Well, salary - its still being negotiated and will be the main reason not to go - if we think we couldnt afford it.
It's in the figure of around $90-95,000.
We have 2 kids - with their respective costs - 5yrs & 6yrs.
Could manage with 1 car for a while if I wasnt working if we had to.

I am looking at Irvine, Orange county to stay in because;
1. Good reputation for schooling and
2. we have stayed there for a few weeks and some familiarity with the area which would soften the blow, hopefully.
3. Family-friendly or from what i have read and seen on my visit.
4. OH job is in Irvine so nice that its not a big commute for him.

House - its hard to say? Obviously eventually there is the ambition to have a nice place, but we could easily manage in a 2 bed place for a bit? Just the concern is staying within the boundaries of the schools we would want for the kids.

thanks.

lisa67 Dec 8th 2010 11:37 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 
Just want to say that I disagreenwith the OP's statement about the schooling here being a year behind. My kids have been through the system here for the past 10 years and I used to be a teacher in the UK so from our personal experience the schooling hasn't been behind at all.
We're one of the families who have been on the H1/H4 visas and we love it here and wouldn't move back for the world!! :)

Serene1 Dec 8th 2010 11:50 am

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by lisa67 (Post 9028425)
Just want to say that I disagreenwith the OP's statement about the schooling here being a year behind. My kids have been through the system here for the past 10 years and I used to be a teacher in the UK so from our personal experience the schooling hasn't been behind at all.
We're one of the families who have been on the H1/H4 visas and we love it here and wouldn't move back for the world!! :)

Good for you and nice to hear that you are settled well and enjoying it over there.
I myself had had always thought thAt the US school system had a good reputation, I only have reached the conclusion that schooling is a bit behind from what I have read of peoples experiences on the various threads and also on here.
But it's encouraging to hear that your experience is a good one!

lisa67 Dec 8th 2010 12:18 pm

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by Serene1 (Post 9028449)
Good for you and nice to hear that you are settled well and enjoying it over there.
I myself had had always thought thAt the US school system had a good reputation, I only have reached the conclusion that schooling is a bit behind from what I have read of peoples experiences on the various threads and also on here.
But it's encouraging to hear that your experience is a good one!

It's really hard to know what to do isn't it? When we came over I had only been to the US once and that was to look at the area we were considering living in. We decided to give it "a go" for a few years and it took me at least 18 months to feel settled.
Education isn't always about schooling and although you have a lot of different factors to consider just remember that the experience will broaden your Children's horizons enormously and, although not ideal, you can always return to the UK if it doesn't work out. (make sure you have that written in your husband's contract!!)

TimNiceBut Dec 8th 2010 1:32 pm

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by Serene1 (Post 9028379)
Thankyou - seems like a good idea!
Well, salary - its still being negotiated and will be the main reason not to go - if we think we couldnt afford it.
It's in the figure of around $90-95,000.
We have 2 kids - with their respective costs - 5yrs & 6yrs.
Could manage with 1 car for a while if I wasnt working if we had to.

What sort of job does your OH do? Just so people who know the area can advise if the company is lowballing you salary-wise.

Also, would you end up with additional costs in the UK if you came over here that you might have to figure in? For example I'm currently renting out my house in the UK but still have to subsidise the mortgage, which is proving to be a somewhat higher than expected drain on my finances here. Don't forget to factor in these additional costs.

md95065 Dec 8th 2010 1:59 pm

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by Serene1 (Post 9028379)
Thankyou - seems like a good idea!
Well, salary - its still being negotiated and will be the main reason not to go - if we think we couldnt afford it.
It's in the figure of around $90-95,000.
We have 2 kids - with their respective costs - 5yrs & 6yrs.
Could manage with 1 car for a while if I wasnt working if we had to.

OK - this is all still quite subjective and I don't know what your husband's level of experience is but $90 - $95,000 seems a bit low to me - the number that I had been expecting after following this thread was more like $120k.

It clearly isn't impossible and, in fact, the median income in Irvine is right around $95k, so you could get by on that kind of salary, but you would definitely have to be careful.

Are the company offering any kind of relocation package? If not you should ask for one - if they are then you should ask for a bigger one. At a bare minimum you want them to pick up the cost of the air fares for the entire family along with hotel accommodation and a rental car for the first few weejs.

There are lots of one time relocation costs and you can easily see $10k to $20k go out the door within the first few weeks.

Serene1 Dec 8th 2010 2:13 pm

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 

Originally Posted by TimNiceBut (Post 9028625)
What sort of job does your OH do? Just so people who know the area can advise if the company is lowballing you salary-wise.

Also, would you end up with additional costs in the UK if you came over here that you might have to figure in? For example I'm currently renting out my house in the UK but still have to subsidise the mortgage, which is proving to be a somewhat higher than expected drain on my finances here. Don't forget to factor in these additional costs.

Hes IT softwear developer. And we kinda know that it's pretty crap! That's the dilemma?! Similar jobs in USA are paying more but aren't willing to sponsor visas! Looks like it's a trade off!?

Sally Redux Dec 8th 2010 2:26 pm

Re: Hi, advice on H4 visa and CA/Irvine life needed
 
It is really hard to advise, but I would agree the salary is on the low side to support a family of 4. Trying to manage with one car is much harder here. The schools are not necessarily 'behind', but they are struggling with huge budget problems and my problem with the curriculum is that it's all teaching to test to try to bring the stats up. Everything is tougher now in both countries than it was 20 years ago.


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